Baby Shower… or Psychological Torture

So I’m in Amazon Vine so I see a lot of random shit. A big thing right now are these Halloween Baby Shower decorations. Someone found the phrase “A little boo is almost due.” So now there’s a million things with that theme. The first time I saw it, I said to myself is it a baby or a murder? I chuckled a bit.

Don’t get me wrong. I fucking LOVE Halloween. So if I was pregnant around Halloween, I’d be all over this theme. But the more of it I see, the more I’m like — Man, what if you wanted to just scare the shit out of someone with this shit? Hear me out:

When they’re out of the house you set up a big grand one. Something fancy with balloons like a huge announcement. Kinda like this one with a balloon arch and go all out:

They come home. They live alone. They’re not pregnant. Maybe they’re a man. What the actual fuck? Who did this? What kind of weird joke is this? They throw everything away.

Then, you keep doing it. Randomly. Some days they come home and more baby shower decorations are set up. A banner one day. Balloon letters another. A wall backdrop another.

Spread it out. Really make them paranoid.

Am I the boo that’s coming? Clearly someone insane is targeting me.

Then one day, full table set up. Table cloth, cheesy napkins, cups, plates, the WORKS. Set it all up on the table or buffet. But on the table, only set one single setting. Just all the decorations like there’s gonna be a party — but on their table just one place setting. Cheesy plate in the middle. Cheesy napkin with fork and knife. Cheesy cup in the top right corner. Just one.

So like, that’s escalation. That’s fucked up shit. Then the next day — a CAKE. “My first Boo Day” with another single place setting (cause you kept stuff for one more).

Like how fucked up would that be? This should be a movie. A psychological thriller. Someone just coming home to this shit. And the police don’t care. It’s just a prank. It’s baby stuff. Every time it happens, you call the police and they start to just be annoyed with you. No one cares. It’s just a prank someone is playing with you.

Maybe you see a therapist.

Maybe it ends with you sitting down at your place setting with the cake in front of you, resigned to your fate.

Maybe you just turn on the lights and see the cake and a shadowy figure is behind you in a doorway and the movie just ends. Maybe you’re standing there horrified and right then, a car pulls into the driveway and the headlights light up your face as they pull in. Leave it open ended.

Psychological. Torture. Thriller.

And it all came from Vine so like it was all free.