Category: General Nonsense

Errands! Let’s fill up the car!

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Errands! Let’s fill up the car!

Today, I acquired the things. I did many errands. I took off work early to go to the Psychiatrist. Then, Garvins was on that side of town so I stopped in for Hay. Then Home Depot… Then Publix to drop off my prescription refills. Listen, it was a lot. So then I napped and went to pick up the refills.

I’m working on my compost bins. I’m 90% done with Phase 1 (Yes, I will be posting). Phase 1 is just getting all the sides up. They are up, but the back three panels don’t have their metal mesh attached. So I went ahead and got stuff for Phase 2 and a bale of hay to get my compost started (hay is “browns”). Phase 2 will be the fronts. Then Phase 3 will be the Lid. So Qubie was loaded up.

Side note: Garvin’s Feed and Seed had a black cat in the store that was a sweetheart! She came up to me for attention while I was looking around. She demanded pets. She even let me pick her up and I explored all of the store carrying her around and petting her while she purred. I only put her down when it was time to check out.

Hopefully nothing is living in that bale of hay cause it’s living in my car now.

Then on to Home Depot. I got a circular saw! Yes, I’m just gonna start buying tools so I can stop begging everyone for their tools. I will slowly build up a tool collection. The one with a storage bag was $40 more. So I didn’t get that one. But a toolbox that would fit it was $50. So Sterilite steps up to the plate! Look at this shit! And since it’s clear, I can tape the front of the sales box to it and it will be so clear what’s in there. I’m so smart. S-M-R-T.

Time to go home? Nay. We have to drop off our refills from the doctor cause Mrs C needs her crazy pills. Perimenopause is kicking my ass so hard so I need them more than ever. So to Publix!

Shit, I guess this goes in the front now. Qubie is carrying her weight.

Lastly, I leave you with this. Check out these fungus things growing outside of my psychiatrists office. I bet some of you would eat this shit. Nasty. BLUE CHEESE IS LITERALLY JUST MOLDY CHEESE.

Saturday Round-Up

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Saturday Round-Up

Let’s start this post like I started my day. With Louie’s disapproving look.

He just sat like this and stared at us while we chatted in bed before getting up. This was not the pose of him being disrupted or in movement. He’s chillin’ and appauled. He hates when I don’t get up right away. Which is always.

He doesn’t want pets — no. In fact, if I pet him, he will move further away. He wants me to get up. I need to put food in his bowl that he’s not gonna eat right now cause he’s too spoiled with his evening half a can of wet food. Then we have to go outside. He might have to come in early to poop. Otherwise, he want’s to nom some grass and barf. Then I can do my thing while he does his thing in the vicinity. As long as I’m not in bed.

Currently I’m on the laptop on the couch and he’s like just sleeping in the middle of the carpet over there. This is why he wants me out of bed.

I know everyone says get him a friend. But like, I don’t think he’d like a friend at this point. He’s a ham and demands to be the center of attention. Like if you come over to visit my house, he wants to be loved. You’re his new best friend. Because everyone must worship his soft belly. But if you visit too much, or live here, he’ll be over somewhere about 10 feet away. Another cat would probably bother him. And take away the valuable spotlight. Also, he wouldn’t be getting that expensive ass food if I had two cats. I can’t afford to worship two cats. I can lavish one cat.

Look at this adorable acorn I found!

Isn’t it cute and tiny? I haven’t found a random acorn in ages. I loved finding these when I was little. I’m gonna plant it by the giant tree stump in our front yard.

Halloween is the DEVIL

Facebook advertised these super religious trunk-or-treat decorations to me. “Ain’t no ghost but the HOLY GHOST!” That ghost one cracks me up. But hey, at least these people want to still let the kids have fun in costumes and get candy. So props. Like, I guess getting candy from strangers cars instead of houses is less Satanesque.

After typing that sentence though, isn’t this the PERFECT trap? Like a venus fly trap? Like “hey kids — we have candy — it’s Halloween, we’re just religious. Here take a full sized candy ba… **SHOVES KID IN AND CLOSES THE HATCH**

Yall don’t read that if you’re the scared that Halloween will kill your children type. Come on, at least give them this.

And if you’re the type of mom I’d be — give them this until sundown when they can hit up the neighborhoods. That’s right, rake it in, my little pumpkin. Let’s go to the rich neighborhood next. Of course you don’t have to go to school tomorrow. You’re probably gonna be barfing because you ate half that shit. Fuck what your teacher says. THIS IS HALLOWEEN, DAMMIT. It’s one goddamn day. Oh hey, do you need me to tape that back on your costume? Come here, I’ve got tape and we can plug in the glue gun if we need to. I’ve got some trim we can cover that up with. Is my hat on straight? Awesome. Yeah, I know — dads lame. Next year we’ll have to blackmail him. Maybe we could all be Marvel characters! I got him to be Tony Stark once. You gotta start working him in like August.

And here’s my Monstera!

I got it a fucking grade A grow light handing from the second floor. It’s very happy. It’s my favorite. Don’t tell the others. Like the prayer plant is my second favorite. But of course I love you too, my sweet jungle cacti! String of Bananas, we’re working on our relationship. I know, you’re doing fucking amazing. But like, you need something on top. I might get you like a topiary ball frame or something to wrap around before you trail down. I’m working on it.

DEADPOOL! Deadpool deadpool DEADPOOL!

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on DEADPOOL! Deadpool deadpool DEADPOOL!

Are you aware that Deadpool 3 AKA Deadpool and Wolverine comes out Thursday? TWO DAYS FROM NOW. Did you know?

So tonight, I’m watching Deadpool. Tomorrow, I will watch Deadpool 2. And you’re damn fucking straight I already have our Thursday tickets. I bought them this weekend. DEADPOOL DATE! Yep, my husbands going to see Deadpool with me!

Let’s Fucking Go.

No seriously, I’m fucking JAZZED. Look at this adorable Deadpool Lego mini figure I got this weekend at Nerdy Noel. I have him sitting on my monitor like he was sitting on the highway in the first movie. See his little legs are even swinging:

And I didn’t know this until after I bought it and had it at home — BUT HIS MASK COMES OFF! His face is all fucked up and everything:

I’m kicking myself for not getting all three Deadpools they had and I don’t know the booths name to contact them. They had Bob Ross Deadpool and also Deadpool in the X-Men in Training shirt from the second movie.

Oh and I had to replace my refrigerator notepad. I had the “Note from Jack” pad but it got lost in moving. Somehow I have the BACK of the notepad, but none of the paper. So I got a yellow one with gold foil that says “Let’s Fucking Go” off of Etsy. Don’t yall act like you put that pad on yellow on accident. Uhuh.

DEADPOOL! I gotta go get dinner and then me and Louie are watching Deadpool 1. And just because I’m seeing it Thursday doesn’t mean I won’t go see it with you. You going another night? I’m down. Let’s Fucking Go. I already know I’m going to be obsessed with it.

Bring back the stocks?

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Bring back the stocks?

Today I learned the difference in stocks and pillory thanks to Reddit!

Stocks vs Pillory WITH PICTURES:

STOCKS

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stocks

PILLORY

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pillory

Why did we get rid of stocks?

I always thought “stocks” referred to the pillory! I didn’t even know the actual stocks was a thing!

So I get that the pillory is kinda harsh cause they can’t sit and all, but why did we get rid of stocks? I’m 100% seriously asking this question.

You just sit there with your feet bound for people to judge you. As long as someone’s making sure the people in the stocks are safe, it doesn’t look too bad, honestly. Set some up on courthouse square. Most of the pictures even have multiple stocks in a row. So you’re sitting there WITH someone to chat with who’s in the same predicament.

This is way cheaper than a jail cell for like sobering people up or just minor offenses where you get community service or no time. Or for people let off with a fine. Like politicians. One hour in the stocks for the Instagram.

Seriously, this sounds like how I always had to stand against the wall in the back of the cafeteria for talking too much. Like, most days my ass was standing in the back of the cafeteria. Same thing. I was heavily bullied in school, but standing in the back of the cafeteria never particularly bothered me. Way better than detention. I’d get told to stop talking while I was standing there.

Men be living on easy mode

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Men be living on easy mode

Guys be living on easy mode and don’t even know it. I know that’s not a grand revelation. Duh. We all know this. But it comes down to the smallest things.

My house has been a construction zone for a month. Workers in and out most days. My cat lives at my friends house. That mess is still on going but the end is in sight. So why am I saying this? I gotta put on a bra.

Every fucking day. I’m working from home but if I wanna go get a drink from the garage, I gotta put on a bra because there’s strangers in my house. Does my husband have to do this? No. He can roll out of bed and go to the grocery store. Can any woman do that? NO.

You might be telling yourself that I don’t have to wear a bra. Technically true — but I’m 41 and fat and my nipples always poke through everything. And I don’t like showy nipples. So just to leave my bedroom, I gotta put on a bra. Men don’t have to do any of that shit.

Thank you for listening.

Presidential Election Candidates

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Presidential Election Candidates

Biden is 81 and Trump is 78. Do you think either one of them could navigate a self checkout? I propose a test:

  1. Send them to Walmart with a list of 5 regular grocery items.
  2. Have them estimate the total cost of their transaction.
  3. They have to get to Walmart ALONE. I understand that the secret service may have to tag along, but they are to offer no assistance. They have to locate and drive to Walmart alone.
  4. They shop alone for their items.
  5. They go through the self checkout. And yeah, they wait their ass in line. Maybe put makeup on to disguise them.
  6. Then they must navigate and drive back to the starting place.
  7. Compare expected cost vs actual cost for fun.

Think either one could do it in a reasonable amount of time without visibility struggling at any part? And they’re supposed to represent ALL OF US.

I wonder if they could even pump gas and pay at the pump.

Do you think they know about tap-to-pay?

Most Americans can’t even dream of when they’ll finally be able to retire. What’s retirement age now? 67. If you wanna retire, you gotta work and grind for 47 years. And that’s assuming you save up to be able to retire at all, and don’t start working before age 20. I started working at 15.

These out-of-touch motherfuckers could have retired 13 years ago. Most people don’t even live long enough to reach their age.

THEY HAVE OUTLIVED THE AVERAGE AMERICAN MALE LIFESPAN (76 years).

And that’s the current male life span. Trump (the younger of the two) was born in 1946. The average American male life span when he was born was 64. He’s 78.

He turned 16 in 1957.

  • Gasoline (not 10% ethanol bullshit, either) was 28 CENTS a gallon.
  • TVs were black and white.
  • Leave it to Beaver hadn’t even PREMIERED YET.

He turned 21 in 1967. THE PRIME OF HIS LIFE.

  • Gas was 33 cents a gallon.
  • Minimum wage was $1.40 per hour
  • PBS was starting.
  • The handheld calculator was INVENTED.

Biden is even older.

We’re so fucked.

Why isn’t there a maximum age for this shit? They shouldn’t even be allowed to drive at that age (unless they pass a driving test every year).

UPDATE!

What if we put them on The Price is Right!?

Netflix’s Polar

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Netflix’s Polar

It’s my fake Friday. I took a long ass nap. I’m gonna make a frozen Quest pizza and stay up super late.

Some background: I decided to do another booknook. I ordered a generic “Rose Detective Agency.” One that is clearly knocking off Sherlock. The address is 210B Rose Street. Well, that can’t stand. Clearly I’ll have to fix the address and street sign. So if I’m doing that… I might as well do some other customizations… So this led me down a Sherlock (BBC, Benedict Cumberbatch) hole. I’ve decided I’ve just got to rewatch the show for inspiration. I was going to do it this weekend.

So I find myself up late with time to kill. I’ll start my Sherlock binge early! So I pull up Netflix as I assume it’s on there. And I see this:

Interesting, maybe I’ll add it to my watch list. The description: “John Wick meets The Equalizer.” John Wick kinda already was the Equalizer over the dog, but show me more. I watched the trailer.

Well, fuck. Now I’m waiting on my pizza to be done so I can start my movie. It’s totally Mads Mikkelsen as an over-the-top John Wick. It won’t be as good, but it looks like a damn good ride. I’m down.

REVIEW:

It takes over an hour before they even inspire the guy to do any vengeance. In that hour there’s a LOT of gratuitous sex. We’re talking a LOT. Even boobs against a window at one point. The characters are just insanely over the top caricatures of villains. I’ve paused here at the 1 hour and 21 minute mark and it’s FINALLY about to get good. With only 36 minutes left — at least 6 of which is probably credits.

To even compare this to John Wick is just insulting to everyone. I feel like this movie is insulting to Mads Mikkelsen’s talent, even. I mean fuck. It better be a damn good 30 minutes.

***SPOILERS AFTER THIS POINT***

Not that he should be alive at this point, having been tortured for three days and I don’t think they gave him water to drink during any of that and he’s bleeding like a lot — for three days. So very implausible — but he’s finally about to escape and do some killing. Here we go.

So he’s escaping and kicking ass. Only the occasional stop to pant to show he’s struggling. He’s even been shot in the leg by this point. He’s missing an eye — part of the 3 days of being tortured and bleeding. Like maybe if they had only tortured and starved and dehydrated him for one day, I’d give it to you. I mean give me SOMETHING to buy here. But he was literally chained up the whole time. They made a point to show him still chained on the floor before and after each torture — next to a floor drain — for the blood, of course. So like, he hasn’t even been able to go shit or anything. Much less get a drink of water. This is stupid.

And surprising left filed twist ending plus a set up for a second movie.

THUMBS DOWN. You suck, Netflix. I should have watched Sherlock.

I can’t fucking believe you DARED to compare this to John Wick. Fuck.

Weekend in Review

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Weekend in Review

This weekend, I made Lumalee!

The mouth is pretty jacked up, so ill probably work on that. Also, I feel like the green should have started sooner. Did I do an extra blue row or something? And how did I jack up one leg so badly? I did not notice that at all while I was making it. There are parts of it I am unhappy with, but I think it’s cute. I enjoyed making it. It was very much trust the process because it look JACKED-THE-FUCK-UP until I stuffed it. I should have taken a picture.

I really liked how the designer did the top to split it off into two points — very clever IMO. There are changes I would make if I did it again, but I won’t be doing it again. Super glad I bought an extra skein of blue because I sure did need it. I want to do a red mushroom, but I think responsibly, I should do Mario first so I know I have enough red for him first.

The Christmas blanket saga continues. But I’m honestly thinking of putting it aside. It’s not a project I am enjoying at all. I hate the yarn. I have more amigurumis I want to do — but I also really want to do a sampler blanket in greys. I could pick a yarn I actually LIKE. And each rectangle will be a different stitch. I think I’ll pick like three shades of greys — like this kit on Amazon that I am not going to buy:

1) I’ve had to buy compression gloves because working the Christmas blanket has hurt my hand.

2) I’m not enjoying it. It’s a chore, not a fun hobby.

3) The sampler blanket would let me pick a yarn I enjoy working with and that isn’t so damn hard to work with!

4) I’d get to learn a lot of new stitches. And it would keep changing up and not being a slog because once I finish one rectangle, the next would be totally different.

So yeah, thinking of putting the Christmas blanket aside for more enjoyable projects.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Also this weekend, I washed the cars! I meant to wash mine inside and out, but I only got the outside done. But I also did Husband’s car. And I put it off for so long that I was still washing at dusk and got to see BATS IN THE BATHOUSE!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I bought some of these camisoles at Duluth Trading. I’ve been living in them since. I would live in camisoles if I could. I get hot so easy. And if I’m cold, I can throw something on over it. But I can’t live in camisoles because I don’t like not wearing bras around people. I’m sorry, I’m an older generation and I don’t like my nipples showing. My boobs are awesome and do not need support — but I still have pointy nipples. Also, my mom was always braless at home growing up and it embarrassed me. Sorry mom. I wouldn’t have worn bras 24/7 either for my kids. Fuck that.

Anyway — these camisoles have the worthless “shelf bra” built in. BUT BUT BUT — with PADDED CUPS.

Holy fuck, it’s like I unlocked a new life reward. The camisole stays in place — no nip slips. and also NO POINTY NIPPLES.

Yall, they were on sale and I bought one of every color. And when the season changes, I’m gonna see if they have more colors and buy them too. You think I’m kidding? Husband is reading this thinking I spend too much money — honey, have you noticed me wearing that purple one, then the grey one, and now this teal one? Have you seen me wear anything else for like over a week? Do I have too many camisoles? Fuck yes. Burn all the others if you want to use that line of thinking. These are all I want now.

I can go out to the mailbox. My sister slept over and I didn’t have to put on a bra. I can answer the door if needed. No bras or robes required. I can live in my camisole now. It’s fucking amazing. BUY THIS SHIT (Clicky). 10 out of 10, 5 stars all the way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

EDIT: FUCK, How could I forget? I started my first ever seed babies!

It’s all lemongrass. Lemongrass is crazy expensive, I learned last year. SO I’m just seeding a fuckton of it. It keeps mosquitoes away. I’m also gonna try to grow pumpkins this year!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Crochet pattern by AzeliaCrochet.

It’s the end of the world as we know it.

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 2 Comments on It’s the end of the world as we know it.

Please be sure to sing that title as REM would.

So yesterday, I posted about how my car was 10 and needed a cleaning. Well, this weekend is my long weekend and my Friday plans I was excited about got damned, so I can clean my car! I looked up the weather. Nice. I’m gonna do this. I’ll clean the inside too! So I’ve got outside car stuff, I wanted to get the Armor All wipes for the inside. I don’t like bottled cleaners — wipes are so convenient. So I go to Amazon.

I find what I need and put it in my cart. We’re checking out — when’s this gonna arrive? NEXT TUESDAY? What the fuck? Six days? SIX DAYS? On a prime item!? Are you kidding me? You also have raised your prime cost multiple times and now put commercials in my shit. Not cool, Amazon.

So if I don’t wash my car this weekend, it aint getting done. So I figure — Walmart pickup. I get everything in my cart for pickup. I’ll grab it tomorrow cause I gotta go into the office. Then it’s like Walmart turned into a shiny demon … in the middle of the road. AND HE SAID

“Want this delivered?

For free?

Today?”

That’s right, bitches. Walmart plus is free for the first month with free same day delivery. If you choose to keep it, it’s only $13 a month after that. Oh AND it comes with Paramount+. Wait, don’t you already pay a hundred dollars a year for Paramount+? “hisssssssssssss.”

And here’s my shit. On my counter.

That’s right. I even added some heavy cat litter and frozen pizzas. Got here in a few hours — only that long because I didn’t give a fuck so chose a time that it said was a “slow time.”

And this is the license plate frame I’m gonna go with:

So yeah, Amazon is going down. You know I’m always way behind on trends so if I’m here — they’re done for. And have you seen all the articles and videos about how Amazon is just filled with drop shippers and fake Chinese knock offs now? You don’t see quality name brands on Amazon anymore. They’ve made it nearly impossible to sell on their platform for legitimate businesses and they don’t care. They want you to buy the cheap Chinese junk. And most of what you see is “Sponsored” shit that doesn’t even match your search inquiry well.

Dammit. I hate Walmart AND Amazon. But I need convenient and FAST. Amazon Prime and Walmart+ prove that people will pay more for the speed. Can I get Home Depot in on this?

Also, I had the “End of the World” music video mixed up in my head with the “Bad Day” video which I always found funny. So BONUS TRACK:

It’s been an absolute fucking shit show of a week in the C household so it’s appropriate too.

ONE WEEK TO HALLOWEEN!

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 2 Comments on ONE WEEK TO HALLOWEEN!

One week til the best holiday of the year! Get your candy, carve your pumpkins, queue up all the fun movies! Get some candy in case you get trick-or-treaters! I have yet to get one, but I’m gonna get a full size candy bar just in case we get our FIRST one. It’ll be “the Golden Snickers.”

I had husband take some festive photos when I had my Halloween dress on for the Hocus Pocus drag brunch. Thanks, husband! If I ever go missing or die — THIS is the official photo you are to use:

And how could I leave out Norbert:

Sunday, K2 is coming over to do a Hocus Pocus marathon (both 1 AND 2). I hope she makes pumpkin muffins!

My in-laws will be here on Halloween day. Man, they better not bring any of that zealous catholic guilt and try to ruin my best day with some “Satan’s Birthday” bullshit. I don’t have anything planned for the day of. My big Halloween was the Drag Show and our movie day this weekend.

Drag show was awesome. The venue made it insanely overpriced because fuck that venue. The show was fine but then in the second half where they actually did Hocus Pocus numbers was fantastic! The finale was all three Sanderson Sisters doing their big song from the dance in the first movie, “I Put a Spell on You.” It was fucking fabulous.

Oh and I watched Renfield on Amazon Prime. It’s a new movie with Nicolas Cage as Dracula. It’s got Awkwafina too! It’s a Horror Comedy. It was especially hilarious to me because Renfield’s thing is that he goes to CODA (Codependants Anonymous) meetings. Which LOL, so do I! So, of course, I found that hilarious all by itself. Here’s the trailer if you’re interested: