Category: General Nonsense

Baby Shower… or Psychological Torture

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So I’m in Amazon Vine so I see a lot of random shit. A big thing right now are these Halloween Baby Shower decorations. Someone found the phrase “A little boo is almost due.” So now there’s a million things with that theme. The first time I saw it, I said to myself is it a baby or a murder? I chuckled a bit.

Don’t get me wrong. I fucking LOVE Halloween. So if I was pregnant around Halloween, I’d be all over this theme. But the more of it I see, the more I’m like — Man, what if you wanted to just scare the shit out of someone with this shit? Hear me out:

When they’re out of the house you set up a big grand one. Something fancy with balloons like a huge announcement. Kinda like this one with a balloon arch and go all out:

They come home. They live alone. They’re not pregnant. Maybe they’re a man. What the actual fuck? Who did this? What kind of weird joke is this? They throw everything away.

Then, you keep doing it. Randomly. Some days they come home and more baby shower decorations are set up. A banner one day. Balloon letters another. A wall backdrop another.

Spread it out. Really make them paranoid.

Am I the boo that’s coming? Clearly someone insane is targeting me.

Then one day, full table set up. Table cloth, cheesy napkins, cups, plates, the WORKS. Set it all up on the table or buffet. But on the table, only set one single setting. Just all the decorations like there’s gonna be a party — but on their table just one place setting. Cheesy plate in the middle. Cheesy napkin with fork and knife. Cheesy cup in the top right corner. Just one.

So like, that’s escalation. That’s fucked up shit. Then the next day — a CAKE. “My first Boo Day” with another single place setting (cause you kept stuff for one more).

Like how fucked up would that be? This should be a movie. A psychological thriller. Someone just coming home to this shit. And the police don’t care. It’s just a prank. It’s baby stuff. Every time it happens, you call the police and they start to just be annoyed with you. No one cares. It’s just a prank someone is playing with you.

Maybe you see a therapist.

Maybe it ends with you sitting down at your place setting with the cake in front of you, resigned to your fate.

Maybe you just turn on the lights and see the cake and a shadowy figure is behind you in a doorway and the movie just ends. Maybe you’re standing there horrified and right then, a car pulls into the driveway and the headlights light up your face as they pull in. Leave it open ended.

Psychological. Torture. Thriller.

And it all came from Vine so like it was all free.

Are you “special” or just that privileged?

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So I’m on Facebook and I see this post:

Hi! I just need to.. get this out of my chest. I’ve been passing for a very bad time of my life this year. I had no job since December. I had two painful losses and… idk my mind was in a very dark place plus I was depending completely on my stash because without a job I cannot make any purchases. So… this beauty… “Princess and the pea kitty” is out of stock. I am from Mexico so I’m not able to buy it in the destash group. So… it was on Amazon and every day I was pending on the stock. Today I finally receive my first paycheck since I got a job last week and with my card ready to buy it… I entered to Amazon site and… sold out. Nothing… I’m so sad. I cried like a baby I swear. Idk why I wanted it so bad and idk why I felt it like the biggest disappointment but trust me… I’m heart broken.

I sent an email to DAC just to know if maybe by any chance they had 1 left but…

So Diamond Art Club kits are huge and like over $75.  But they have some small ones on Amazon.  This one was like $25 at full price.  I know because it’s the only square drill one Amazon had (their website only sells big ones) and I wanted to practice with the squares before I start my behemoth one.  But I didn’t like the style. 

The point is, this is a luxury that is not needed, 100%.  But it’s an affordable one.  She wasn’t aiming for a $100 kit. 

So let’s start with spoiler: Like 5 people offered to get it to her (Amazon just had Prime Day deals on these kits, hence it being gone now.  So a lot of people probably just bought it cause it was super cheap).  So in the end, she’s getting it.  She’s very happy.  The art community was like fuck me, we got a get her that cat picture.  FIND THE CAT PICTURE. 

Except for one person.

One comment didn’t understand what the big deal is. 

So my question is: are you stupid, have no empathy, or really that blessed?

Listen, I’ve been upside down a few times in life.  Like multiple.  I’ve been negative money many many times. I got laid off back in 2010 and weren’t no job to be had.  So if you’ve never been in this situation, I want to tell you this. 

Sometimes you focus on one little thing.  Nothing big.  You wouldn’t dare hope for something unachievable because your heart can’t handle it if you don’t get there.  Maybe you’re gonna eat out with your first paycheck.  Maybe you’re gonna get the good milk.  Just something that is your focus.  And when you get real sad you think about how you’re totally gonna get the good milk soon.  That thought gets you through.  It’s stupid and little, but it’s also the world. 

So for 7 months this girl has been saying, I’m getting that cat picture.  And fucking Prime Day puts it on sale the weekend before her first paycheck and now it’s gone forever.  And she’s distraught and crying because that was her THING.  And now she’ll never have the thing!  But she went through so much for the thing!

How can you NOT empathize with that?  Fuck me, I’ll pay the shipping.

Like is this an internet troll or what? Literally everyone else in the comments is trying to find a copy and offering to help pay to get it to her.  And one dumbass doesn’t understand. 

Palate Cleanser

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So things have in fact gotten even worse since my last post — but fuck that. This post isn’t about that. This post is about some new wonderful developments.

Third Day

Third Day is doing a 30th anniversary REUNION TOUR!

Third Day broke up back in like 2018.

Roll it back. So in 1998 or 1999, I was in Highschool. A girl in my class had been gifted a cassette of “Time” for Christmas and she hated it. (Yes a cassette — I’m old.) I was a very much bubble Christian (ugh, I know, I hate me too) so she gave it to me. I fucking loved it.

I became a huge fan. Remember message boards? I was on the Third Day message boards. I started traveling to my current city every year to see them live at Big Spring Jam (yall remember when concerts were super cheap and highschoolers could afford to drive 2 hours to see their favorite bands at big outdoor concerts with lots of stages?). I went down the Third Day rabbit hole, my friends. Any time I could see them, I saw them. I had a lot of shit going on in my life having moved in with my dad and antifreeze sister being abusive and bat shit crazy — Third Day got me through that shit.

Then, sometime around 2000 or maybe 2001, an AMAZING THING HAPPENED. I won a sweepstakes to go see them on tour! I got go to Phoenix Arizona. I met the band saw them there. Then we went to California and saw them there! I even got a prize package and spending money. It was fucking awesome! I took mom with me. They lost my luggage so I wore this shirt for like the whole time:

Obviously, the trip was amazing. We got to see new places and meet lots of cool people. And of course, see my favorite band of all time, TWICE. I mean they were probably creeped out that I had seen them double digits of times — but considering the second winner was a couple who didn’t even know any of their music, I think they were at least glad a fan won. Also a fan who was prolific on their message boards so every night I got online and gave all the fans a recap of the days events. I remember Tai Anderson even asked which one of us was the one posting on the message boards — yeah, that’s me. I got to dip my toes in the Pacific at the beach too!

After that, mom became a die hard fan. I think it was what really bonded mom and I. We hadn’t been close before that. But that coinciding with me moving away and getting a fuck ton of therapy years later helped us become great friends. So after that trip, we’d go to all their concerts together. Yes, I have everything they’ve ever put out — including the rare stuff from before they became known. I was that kind of fan. Mom had all of their CDs and played them constantly.

So imagine our heartbreak when they announced their farewell tour in 2018. Of course we went though. I had actual job money by then so we went to see them at the Fox Theater in Atlanta. And I treated us to a swanky swank hotel room directly across the street with a view of the theater. You might recognize this photo from her service and as the one I have framed in our bedroom. That’s her looking out at the theater:

And then here’s pictures of us before the show and during the show. Last time we got to see them ever 🙁

RIP, Mom. We played Third Day music at her funeral. She was a bigger fan than I was. I loved their early more rock music and she loved their later more worship music. We just loved going to see them whenever we could though.

So then this week it pops up that they’re doing a tour? It’s not until next year but the presale started today. Well, I don’t know who I’m going with, but I got two tickets:

They have a Birmingham show and a Nashville show. With all the clusterfuck in Birmingham this week, I was like — um, Nashville please. Don’t know the plan or even who I’ll go with, but I got tickets just in case. The thought of seeing them without mom is super sad — but again, just in case. I got the tickets.

Birthday Trip!

I haven’t seen my bestie M in forever! And I’ve never visited him since he moved away to work in DC. I’ve kept saying I want to, but haven’t made it happen. I never have PTO and money. I’ve also never been to DC. So this year, we’re taking a birthday trip to see him! I’m so excited! Something to look forward to!

Husband and I want to start taking trips being that we’ve been on a single trip alone in our 13 year of marriage. Also since my family fell apart and doesn’t do holidays, maybe take trips those years we would have done Christmas with them. You know, give me some shit to live for and look forward to.

So we were discussing when my long weekends are and I was like lets make something happen this year. So we’re looking at visiting M this year — maybe for Veterans Day because M and I are both November babies. Then maybe Banff Canada next winter. (Husband found Banff and thought I’d like it cause it looks like a castle. And you can see the Northern Lights from there and that’s a bucket list for me). And then maybe finally take our damn honeymoon for a 15th anniversary in 2027.

So… BIRTHDAY TRIP! I get to see M’s cats and meet his new half feral friend, Ivar. And see his house! I hope Fenrir will come sleep in the bed with me. Fenrir is snuggly.

Husband wants to drive up so we might take 2 days for travel both ways with a solid three in the middle for time with M and museums. He wants to see the space and flight museum and I want to go to the Smithsonian and the Art Museum. With this fucking government mess, I do NOT care to see any of that shit right now.

What the fuck, Walmart?

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Listen, the economy is in the shitter, so I’ve started ordering a bunch of groceries through Walmart. Specifically, Walmart Plus AKA Walmart+.

When I do grocery delivery, I’ve been pretty happy. The drivers are always nice — they like their jobs. If something is missing, it’s super easy to hop online and get a refund. Then I got to Publix to get my meats and whatever Walmart didn’t have. The only extra cost is the tip to the driver. They also do free shipping.

Well, I did a huge order this weekend. But I split it in two. Stuff I needed for Monday and perishables, I got deliverered from store. Everything else I did shipping. That way it wouldn’t be a massive total to tip on and I didn’t care if the other stuff sat on the porch.

So for shipping, I ordered:

  • Four big bags of prepopped popcorn (don’t judge, husband doesn’t like the fresh made as much).
  • Five bags of keto chips (four smaller bags per bag).
  • Four boxes of keto poptarts.
  • A bargained size box of garbage bags.
  • Six bags of keto cereal.
  • FOUR CASES OF CANNED DRINKS.

Now, I assumed all of this would come from a local store. Usually, they just have their drivers drop off “shipping” deliveries that are just in grocery bags. I have ordered the case of drinks before and it did ship FedEx (in this same clusterfuck fashion) with some other stuff, but I thought it was because my store didn’t have that flavor.

So I get a notice that it will come in two shipments Monday and Tuesday or I could pick one shipment on Wednesday. Fuck you, being my shit quicker. They didn’t get that memo because Monday, I get a notification that it has shipped via FedEx from TEXAS. States away. It will be here Wednesday. I didn’t think more of it though because I didn’t have anything I’d run out of before then so whatever.

Today, Wednesday, I get my delivery. An enormous box that is already torn open with all my shit just thrown in it. It’s torn open because nothing is actually holding any of this shit in place — it’s just a bunch of shit thrown in a box and shipped.

So I dragged the box in because it was huge and heavy and here it is:

I haven’t touched anything in that box for this photo. That’s how I got it. Cases of cans with no padding except for my other groceries. Hell, look — even the case of cans have come open and spilled cans out. Crushed boxes, crushed chips, and one popcorn even just gave up the ghost and exploded to fill the air with a lovely toasty scent and get all over my floor. There’s six bags of expensive ass cereal in there too — under on of those cases of drinks. And this is over $200 of groceries in here. All just in this one big giant box.

Even if you wanted to ship it out in one absurd box, couldn’t you package the crushables in a box and the drinks in a box and put those side by side in here? Even the damn drink boxes are banged up by each other.

Hang on, are you getting the scale of this box? Like boxes this big aren’t for shipping individual things. They’re for appliances. Or bodies.

See? That’s my fat ass IN THIS BOX. And I can’t even do anything about it. Because it shipped, if I want to do any returns they have to be SHIPPED VIA FEDEX back. Yeah, usually when you need to return something, Walmart+ drivers just come pick it up. Cause they delivered it. I fucking love that. BUT NOT IN THIS CLUSTER FUCK.

Also, like I said — this isn’t a one off. I had a case of cans mixed with a bunch of groceries once before — they just weren’t quite as crushable as these. Nor was the order as large. So there wasn’t as much box for the CASE OF CANNED DRINKS to party in.

Does anyone know how the fuck to complain about this? Yes, I called. I filed a complaint. But it’s with a call center in India so you know it won’t get seen.

If you ship anything — make sure to order heavy things BY THEMSELVES. Separate orders. Wait for the heavy shit to ship out — then order the rest. Cause good god. $200 doesn’t even buy you packaging or two boxes.

Christianity

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Rabbit hole

OK, so out of no where topic. Not REALLY though because I typed this all up as a reply to someone on Reddit. Let me explain the Rabbit hole:

I won’t bother with the Reddit post because it wasn’t even about Christianity, it was about a Muslim chick not wanting music at her baby shower. And then in the comments there was shit about religious people cherry picking what they believe (because some Muslims listen to music and some don’t). So, naturally, Christians got brought up — specifically by a guy with some trauma from his Christian dad who hates gay people. So then someone “explained” that some of the Old Testament laws are applicable and some are not. I think he used the terms “Moral” and “Cultic.” So then someone is like where, exactly, is that laid out? And I said Romans. Literally just that. Cause that’s where most people get that from. I just said “In Romans” — neither agreeing nor disagreeing just answering because the guy who initially said it refused to answer anything and told the guy to google. So THEN the guy asks me “Where in Romans?”

Ok, all caught up? Here’s my answer:

Oh you are asking the wrong person on that. I believe that the letters in the Bible were written with specific intent for their specific audience they were written to. They were written by men after Jesus. It’s not like Jesus pooped out the new testament.

The New Testament was put together over time with humans giving weight to what they thought was most important. Most people cite Paul’s letters to the Romans as laying out the law. But it’s all over Romans. A few examples:

~~~~~

Romans 13:
8 Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law. 9 For the commandments, “You shall not commit adultery, You shall not murder, You shall not steal, You shall not covet,” and any other commandment, are summed up in this word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” 10 Love does no wrong to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.

~~~~~

Romans 7:
4 So, my brothers and sisters, you also died to the law through the body of Christ, that you might belong to another, to him who was raised from the dead, in order that we might bear fruit for God. 5 For when we were in the realm of the flesh, the sinful passions aroused by the law were at work in us, so that we bore fruit for death. 6 But now, by dying to what once bound us, we have been released from the law so that we serve in the new way of the Spirit, and not in the old way of the written code.

~~~~~

Romans 14:
5 One person esteems one day as better than another, while another esteems all days alike. Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind.

~~~~~

Now that in mind, I believe we are bound by what Jesus told us, not men. And that was to love God and to love one another. Paul tries to lay that out in Romans. He also mentions this in his letter to the Corinthians:

~~~~~

1 Corinthians 9
20 To the Jews I became as a Jew, in order to win Jews. To those under the law I became as one under the law (though not being myself under the law) that I might win those under the law. 21 To those outside the law I became as one outside the law (not being outside the law of God but under the law of Christ) that I might win those outside the law.

~~~~~

The Old Testament is the old covenant(s – Adam, Noah, Moses) which Jesus released us from when he established the New Covenant. But Jesus also noted that this was not just free for all lawlessness:

~~~~~

Matthew 5
17 “Do not think that I came to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I did not come to abolish but to fulfill. 18 “For truly I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not the smallest letter or stroke shall pass from the Law until all is accomplished. 19 “Whoever then annuls one of the least of these commandments, and teaches others to do the same, shall be called least in the kingdom of heaven; but whoever keeps and teaches them, he shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven.”

~~~~~

Now NOTE what he said there. Anyone under the New Covenant who accepts Jesus’s sacrifice still gets into Heaven. That’ all you HAVE to do. THAT’S the requirement. But then he points out, those who do keep the laws will be called great.

I am a nondenominational Christian as I think all the denominations bicker over insignificant crap. Though I do fall into some sort of the non-Catholic’s as I agree with Martin Luther in the 1500’s when he told them they were full of shit. Like I’m with Luther on that.

I think if you asked Paul which is more important — following the letter of the old testament or behaving as Jesus would have behaved — he would go with the latter. And Jesus wasn’t hanging out with the Pharisees, he was with the sinners showing them love.

And there in that Corinthians I posted, Paul even says he himself changed the laws he followed according to who he was with to win them to Christ. Because the laws are not what is important. Winning people to Christ is what is important as he is the only way to Heaven.

So I hate that so many people are driven from Christianity by a bunch of hypocritical Christians who “cherry pick” like this guys says. BECAUSE THEY’RE MISSING THE BIG IMPORTANT PART.

It’s not about all the little things you do and rules you follow. It’s not about the laws. The New Covenant does not require us to follow them. The New Covenant is for us to love and to do what is true in our spirit and heart. Like that part about the Sabbath — those who choose Sunday — awesome! Those who choose Saturday — awesome! Why are we telling each other the other is going to hell cause they picked a different day? They are following what God calls THEM to do. And both are following the rule of Love.

(Keeping in mind that love is not lawless — murder aint love, adultery aint love for your spouse)

In Matthew 7, Jesus is also quoted with the famous “Judge not lest you be judged.”

I firmly believe that we will be held to the highest standards we judged and held others to. And I personally, am a piece of shit. So I’m just gonna let God decide what is a sin and what is not a sin. I also don’t believe there are any unforgivable sins (again, I’m with Luther, the Catholics are wrong — don’t get me STARTED on suicide I will go OFF).

Now

OK, so that was the end of the post. And I think it was beyond the character limit because I couldn’t even post it. So I wanted to share HERE on my blog, because I think it really shines a light on what I personally believe. And it has come up in my life. Why do I curse? And I’ve already defended tattooing on here once.

And really when I read that Corinthians verse I was just like THAT’S ME!

I’ve tried to explain to people before. I am not a perfect Christian. I’m not holy and hoity. I curse and I am who I am. And because of this, I’m a lot more approachable. I could specifically name three individuals right now without much thought who asked me a lot of questions about Christianity on which they were curious but would not have been willing to ask… oh say.. my mother in law. And that’s why I truly believe in my heart, that I am perfectly fine. Because God uses me anyway.

It’s like with mental health. I want you to know that I have issues and it’s OK to have issues! You can talk to me about it. I’ll tell you everything. (Speaking of, I had to RUN from work today due to impending mental breakdown due to anxiety attack — like I emailed my boss, set up my OOO replies, and speed walked to my car cause aint no one here close enough to see me crying and breaking down).

It’s like how I tell people, psychopathy is a scale. And we actually do need psychopaths. They’re not all murders. Most CEOs are psychopaths.

God needs ALL TYPES of Christians. And yes, that include the ones like me who curse and talk raunchy.

And we don’t even have to discuss it cause the “Old Laws” are moot. We have a New Covenant! With Jesus — and Jesus is fucking awesome! I talk to him every night! And sometimes while I’m driving. And I remind him a lot that I fully expect to see my fucking cat when I get there. No seriously, I do say that in my prayers. I might be one of those lower levels in heaven, but I better have my damn cat.

Sorry, I got distracted. Jesus is awesome! God was like these fucking morons can’t follow a rule to save their damn lives. And THAT’S why Jesus came and fulfilled the Old Covenant with Moses and made the New Covenant that has like two rules. Love God. Love each other. AND YALL CANT EVEN GET THAT RIGHT.

First, I don’t believe being gay is a sin. I just don’t. Sue me. God can decide what is a sin. But okay, so you’re argument might be “but what if it IS — love the sinner hate the sin” some bullshit like that. Ok well here’s my reply.

Jesus said to love one another as I have loved you. He was talking to the Apostles. Read that again. HE WAS TALKING TO THE APOSTLES. Who were they? No, don’t name them. Name one of them — Judas. Uhuh. And what did Judas do? He fucking sold Jesus out and got him hung up and crucified. And that is a gruesome death — and they like overdid it with Jesus too. Normally they’d break your legs to let you suffocate so you’d die faster and they didn’t do that for Jesus. That’s why they finally just stabbed him out of pity. Shit, I’m distracted again.

Judas.

Jesus knew he’d do it. He told them one of them would sell him out. He full on KNEW Judas was a bastard. And he treated him no different than he treated any of his other apostles. He didn’t even TELL the other apostles that Judas was a bastard. And they begged him to tell them who it was. He treated them all with love equally.

So yeah, kick out your child for being gay and call yourself a Christian. That’s TOTALLY what Jesus would have done.

Anyway. I’m done. Hope that was helpful to someone one day.

TikTok’s Savior. Nothing is ever new.

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Trump is the the savior of TikTok! All praise Trump! The man who first suggested the ban himself when he was in office previously. Biden’s administration told them they didn’t have to shut down yet and there would be no penalties yet. TikTok said promises weren’t enough. Two days before Inauguration they go dark with a message about working with Trump. Day before the Inauguration, Trump’s promises are good enough to come back online. It’s all a stunt. There is nothing new under the sun.

From the Roman satirical poet Juvenal (c. 100 AD):

“Already long ago, from when we sold our vote to no man, the People have abdicated our duties; for the People who once upon a time handed out military command, high civil office, legions — everything, now restrains itself and anxiously hopes for just two things: bread and circuses.”

Two impeachments, 30+ felonies. Give them TikTok and watch them dance.

Errands! Let’s fill up the car!

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Today, I acquired the things. I did many errands. I took off work early to go to the Psychiatrist. Then, Garvins was on that side of town so I stopped in for Hay. Then Home Depot… Then Publix to drop off my prescription refills. Listen, it was a lot. So then I napped and went to pick up the refills.

I’m working on my compost bins. I’m 90% done with Phase 1 (Yes, I will be posting). Phase 1 is just getting all the sides up. They are up, but the back three panels don’t have their metal mesh attached. So I went ahead and got stuff for Phase 2 and a bale of hay to get my compost started (hay is “browns”). Phase 2 will be the fronts. Then Phase 3 will be the Lid. So Qubie was loaded up.

Side note: Garvin’s Feed and Seed had a black cat in the store that was a sweetheart! She came up to me for attention while I was looking around. She demanded pets. She even let me pick her up and I explored all of the store carrying her around and petting her while she purred. I only put her down when it was time to check out.

Hopefully nothing is living in that bale of hay cause it’s living in my car now.

Then on to Home Depot. I got a circular saw! Yes, I’m just gonna start buying tools so I can stop begging everyone for their tools. I will slowly build up a tool collection. The one with a storage bag was $40 more. So I didn’t get that one. But a toolbox that would fit it was $50. So Sterilite steps up to the plate! Look at this shit! And since it’s clear, I can tape the front of the sales box to it and it will be so clear what’s in there. I’m so smart. S-M-R-T.

Time to go home? Nay. We have to drop off our refills from the doctor cause Mrs C needs her crazy pills. Perimenopause is kicking my ass so hard so I need them more than ever. So to Publix!

Shit, I guess this goes in the front now. Qubie is carrying her weight.

Lastly, I leave you with this. Check out these fungus things growing outside of my psychiatrists office. I bet some of you would eat this shit. Nasty. BLUE CHEESE IS LITERALLY JUST MOLDY CHEESE.

Saturday Round-Up

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Let’s start this post like I started my day. With Louie’s disapproving look.

He just sat like this and stared at us while we chatted in bed before getting up. This was not the pose of him being disrupted or in movement. He’s chillin’ and appauled. He hates when I don’t get up right away. Which is always.

He doesn’t want pets — no. In fact, if I pet him, he will move further away. He wants me to get up. I need to put food in his bowl that he’s not gonna eat right now cause he’s too spoiled with his evening half a can of wet food. Then we have to go outside. He might have to come in early to poop. Otherwise, he want’s to nom some grass and barf. Then I can do my thing while he does his thing in the vicinity. As long as I’m not in bed.

Currently I’m on the laptop on the couch and he’s like just sleeping in the middle of the carpet over there. This is why he wants me out of bed.

I know everyone says get him a friend. But like, I don’t think he’d like a friend at this point. He’s a ham and demands to be the center of attention. Like if you come over to visit my house, he wants to be loved. You’re his new best friend. Because everyone must worship his soft belly. But if you visit too much, or live here, he’ll be over somewhere about 10 feet away. Another cat would probably bother him. And take away the valuable spotlight. Also, he wouldn’t be getting that expensive ass food if I had two cats. I can’t afford to worship two cats. I can lavish one cat.

Look at this adorable acorn I found!

Isn’t it cute and tiny? I haven’t found a random acorn in ages. I loved finding these when I was little. I’m gonna plant it by the giant tree stump in our front yard.

Halloween is the DEVIL

Facebook advertised these super religious trunk-or-treat decorations to me. “Ain’t no ghost but the HOLY GHOST!” That ghost one cracks me up. But hey, at least these people want to still let the kids have fun in costumes and get candy. So props. Like, I guess getting candy from strangers cars instead of houses is less Satanesque.

After typing that sentence though, isn’t this the PERFECT trap? Like a venus fly trap? Like “hey kids — we have candy — it’s Halloween, we’re just religious. Here take a full sized candy ba… **SHOVES KID IN AND CLOSES THE HATCH**

Yall don’t read that if you’re the scared that Halloween will kill your children type. Come on, at least give them this.

And if you’re the type of mom I’d be — give them this until sundown when they can hit up the neighborhoods. That’s right, rake it in, my little pumpkin. Let’s go to the rich neighborhood next. Of course you don’t have to go to school tomorrow. You’re probably gonna be barfing because you ate half that shit. Fuck what your teacher says. THIS IS HALLOWEEN, DAMMIT. It’s one goddamn day. Oh hey, do you need me to tape that back on your costume? Come here, I’ve got tape and we can plug in the glue gun if we need to. I’ve got some trim we can cover that up with. Is my hat on straight? Awesome. Yeah, I know — dads lame. Next year we’ll have to blackmail him. Maybe we could all be Marvel characters! I got him to be Tony Stark once. You gotta start working him in like August.

And here’s my Monstera!

I got it a fucking grade A grow light handing from the second floor. It’s very happy. It’s my favorite. Don’t tell the others. Like the prayer plant is my second favorite. But of course I love you too, my sweet jungle cacti! String of Bananas, we’re working on our relationship. I know, you’re doing fucking amazing. But like, you need something on top. I might get you like a topiary ball frame or something to wrap around before you trail down. I’m working on it.

DEADPOOL! Deadpool deadpool DEADPOOL!

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Are you aware that Deadpool 3 AKA Deadpool and Wolverine comes out Thursday? TWO DAYS FROM NOW. Did you know?

So tonight, I’m watching Deadpool. Tomorrow, I will watch Deadpool 2. And you’re damn fucking straight I already have our Thursday tickets. I bought them this weekend. DEADPOOL DATE! Yep, my husbands going to see Deadpool with me!

Let’s Fucking Go.

No seriously, I’m fucking JAZZED. Look at this adorable Deadpool Lego mini figure I got this weekend at Nerdy Noel. I have him sitting on my monitor like he was sitting on the highway in the first movie. See his little legs are even swinging:

And I didn’t know this until after I bought it and had it at home — BUT HIS MASK COMES OFF! His face is all fucked up and everything:

I’m kicking myself for not getting all three Deadpools they had and I don’t know the booths name to contact them. They had Bob Ross Deadpool and also Deadpool in the X-Men in Training shirt from the second movie.

Oh and I had to replace my refrigerator notepad. I had the “Note from Jack” pad but it got lost in moving. Somehow I have the BACK of the notepad, but none of the paper. So I got a yellow one with gold foil that says “Let’s Fucking Go” off of Etsy. Don’t yall act like you put that pad on yellow on accident. Uhuh.

DEADPOOL! I gotta go get dinner and then me and Louie are watching Deadpool 1. And just because I’m seeing it Thursday doesn’t mean I won’t go see it with you. You going another night? I’m down. Let’s Fucking Go. I already know I’m going to be obsessed with it.

Bring back the stocks?

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Bring back the stocks?

Today I learned the difference in stocks and pillory thanks to Reddit!

Stocks vs Pillory WITH PICTURES:

STOCKS

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stocks

PILLORY

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pillory

Why did we get rid of stocks?

I always thought “stocks” referred to the pillory! I didn’t even know the actual stocks was a thing!

So I get that the pillory is kinda harsh cause they can’t sit and all, but why did we get rid of stocks? I’m 100% seriously asking this question.

You just sit there with your feet bound for people to judge you. As long as someone’s making sure the people in the stocks are safe, it doesn’t look too bad, honestly. Set some up on courthouse square. Most of the pictures even have multiple stocks in a row. So you’re sitting there WITH someone to chat with who’s in the same predicament.

This is way cheaper than a jail cell for like sobering people up or just minor offenses where you get community service or no time. Or for people let off with a fine. Like politicians. One hour in the stocks for the Instagram.

Seriously, this sounds like how I always had to stand against the wall in the back of the cafeteria for talking too much. Like, most days my ass was standing in the back of the cafeteria. Same thing. I was heavily bullied in school, but standing in the back of the cafeteria never particularly bothered me. Way better than detention. I’d get told to stop talking while I was standing there.