Migraines and Math

Yall, my head hurts. I was flirting with a headache all weekend. You know where it comes and goes? Never really enough to get up and take anything though. But Tuesday I went into work and was just like… No. My head hurt and it’s only Tuesday. I can’t do this. So I took a Nurtec (prescription migraine medication can only be taken every 48 hours) and went home. That evening a tree fell on my lawn and I was like fuck it, I’m not going in Wednesday either. All this stress is not helping the migraine.

Wednesday was a headache all day. It comes and goes in waves. Like waves of headache vs waves of migraine. At one point I laid on the couch to rest and I was uncomfortable because my wrist was bent at an odd angle but I did not have the energy to move. Like to move at all. I was just in pain. Also hungry. I was going to ask husband to bring me some peanuts and medication and help me sit up because I could move my lips, but he was about to have a meeting (he works from home). So I was just like. Meh. This is my life now. Then like an hour later I heard him get up and wrangled up the energy to move my wrist finally and Louie came over for pets while I slowly recovered the will to move.

Since I couldn’t really even watch TV yesterday and my cat doesn’t like snuggles, I went to work today. If I’m gonna just intermittently read Reddit, I can get paid to do it. I’m gonna be in pain either way. I can’t miss a full week of work. This could go on for who knows how long. But bonus — it’s been 48 hours so I can take another Nurtec! It didn’t work again. But last night husband went and got me a refill of Excedrin Migraine and I’ve been living off that (I tried Tylenol first and it was a no go). Excedrin Migraine seems to ease the pain for between 1 and 2 hours — but I can only take it every 4.

Last night I couldn’t sleep well (SURPRISE!) but at like 4am, I realized my head didn’t hurt! Holy shit! I was so relieved. I still couldn’t sleep, but it was over. I had feared it was just going to keep going for weeks. So I was just happy and relieved. I was like, I can sleep now!

So yall know, I have a sleep disorder. What I usually do to fall asleep is try to think of the last dream I had and get in that mind space. But the last dream I had sucked. Steve Irwin was in it and I was helping him and another trainer with these platypus stingray things. Well, not platypus. More stingray. But like fat. Like squishmellow stingrays. They had that stingray mouth thing where their mouth is like on their stomach. And I was inside in a murky pool area that was connected to some outside pool or lake. I was supposed to entertain the baby squishmellow stingray while they worked with the adults outside. I think we were getting them ready for a show or something. So I was playing fetch with the baby. Like I had all these pool/bath toys I would throw for him to fetch. But not like dog-fetch, like cat-fetch. Where they go get it and you act all happy but they don’t actually bring it back. So me and baby squish were actually getting along OK. He liked to be petted and kept like rubbing up on my shoulder cause he was having fun. I got over the weird mouth thing. He was kinda cute. But like, he’s a baby and he got bored so he swam out to where the other two were and it was murky water so I couldn’t see him. And that messed up the training with the parents and Steve Irwin went fucking ballistic on me for not being able to just entertain baby squish.

He was really mean.

And I love Steve Irwin. He and Mr Rogers are like fucking saints. They were too good for us. So nowhere in my brain do I really think that Steve Irwin was an asshole. I’m also afraid of murky/dark water and water dreams end up with sharks and sharks terrify me so I was like fuck that dream, we’re not going back there. So I let my mind wander around to things I needed to do. I need to put out fertilizer this weekend. I’m also going to tighten up the sunsail over the new deck. It has stretched quite a bit and I’ve proven to myself that I can reach the anchor points.

So I was thinking, which anchor point should I tighten first? Because that will affect which way the shade gets pulled. So I was trying to visualize the geometry of it from above — a triangle with two points I can pull towards. But it’s not that simple because they both have to be tightened so I’m trying to visualize the outer triangle which is the anchor points and the inner triangle which is the sunsail and how I want it to shift. If I tighten one more than the other, I can almost rotate it a bit inside the outer anchor triangle. I kinda want it to pull more towards the house, so if I tighten that one as much as I can first it’ll shift the sail closer to the house overall…

BAM — Insta-pain.

IT’S MATH. That was the big problem when I had my brain injury. I couldn’t do math. At first I literally just could not even do simple math. Then as I healed, it hurt my head to do math so I had to be careful to push myself but not too far. Now my headache of 3 days went away only to come back when I try to do MATH. Fuck.

I called the neurologist today and left a message. I hope the nurse calls me tomorrow. Like maybe they could give me an Ajovy shot? But then I was thinking an Ajovy shot is going to cost 125$ and I’m hemorrhaging money right now. Also, I probably couldn’t get it tomorrow because I’d need insurance pre-approval BS. But then this afternoon, I remembered that once, they gave me Ajovy in the office. So like, maybe I can ask if they can prescribe it and I can come pick up a sample? I just want my headache to go away.

Oh and here’s what I think of when I think of weird stringray mouths. Also probably why baby squish kept rubbing my shoulder. Fucking meme.