Airing of Grievances & Warranties.

Festivus has come (early or late?). We’re having the airing of grievances. I’ve got a lot of problems with you people, and now you’re gonna hear about it.

First, I fucking LOVE my Vornado fan. So much so, that I’ve bought three. When the first one died, I ordered another online. Then it (the ultimate fan in question) began to act hinky so I ordered a third fan to replace it. Well, hinky guy straightened up after that so I just had two. That’s cool. Amazing fan.

Cut to now and hinky is acting up again. Replacement already has another use so I need to order another. That’s cool. I love my Vornado. So I hop over to Amazon (after comparing prices to Walmart because I’m trying to switch over to Walmart+ because FUCK AMAZON). I have ordered this fan twice before. I know. Thank you. But wait — 5 year warranty? How old is this one? Well, hinky is only 4 years old. Thank you order history.

I look them up and they are an American company and seem to be pretty good (I mean it’s a fucking amazing fan, so I’m not surprised). So I contact them about my fan, hinky. They’re like “That’s cool. Just cut the cord and send us picture evidence so we can ship you a new one.”

Wait what? I get a FREE fan? I was just about to pay $50 for one!

Well, I have other warranty things that have been bugging me too. So it’s warranty day, bitches.

Calphalon lifetime warranty? What does that cover? I watch a youtube where they replaced his so yeah — I’m filling a claim on this expensive ass pan. We were gifted two from our registry for our wedding (no idea how two were purchased from the registry). Well, I never opened one. It’s moved with us in its original packaging. It’s been my favorite pan for 12 years. But it’s finally just not at all non-stick anymore. So I broke out the old-newbie. Holy shit. This pan is amazing! I forgot how great this pan used to be. I’m filling a warranty claim! Back up your words, Calphalon!

Mailboss mail box. Lifetime warranty. Why does my $300 white mailbox look like such shit after a year and 2 months outside in a mild climate in near drought? Why you so rusty? Lifetime warranty? But warranty doesn’t cover rust and finishes. Well, I’m arguing this is a fucking defect in yalls paint. So I called and they asked me to send pictures. So I did.

Pictures of all three products were sent in today. I’ll let you know if I get replacements. I’m pretty positive on the Vornado because they already accepted the claim — I just needed to send evidence that I “destroyed” the old one by cutting the cord — literally. We shall see on the others.