It’s March. Again.

It’s March. Yall ready for this? ‘Cause last year wasn’t none of our asses ready. We’re still getting our asses kicked from the clusterfuck that was last March. You got your toilet paper? Your prescriptions? Charged the batteries in your car jumpers and emergency power banks? You got plenty of gas? You make sure the food and batteries in the tornado shelter aren’t expired? You ready to build a fire for the next Winter-Storm-Of-1993? Washed all your masks? Spare cash? We gotta be ready for anything.

“Beware the Ides of March.” Ides of March my ass! Caesar ain’t going down, we all are.

Things I didn’t have last March:

• Spare freezer.
• Toilet paper stash.
• Preferred branch of paper towels stash.

Things I did have last March:

• A mother.

Be ready, bitches.