Tag: cursing cats

WE HAVE A DECK!

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So back in June, I told yall we were building a deck (click here if you missed it). And now a month later, we have a deck! It’s awesome!

When we built our pool, we did the regular concrete surround (a certain allotment comes with your pool installation). To fill in the rest of the fenced in area, we used a 2-inch rock mix. (Maybe it was bigger than 2 inches?). We have regretted this ever since. What a fucking terrible idea. They didn’t put anything under the rocks, so weeds just grow right up through them! And in the Fall, all the leaves and crap fall and it’s near impossible to clean out. Even if you spend hours with a rake and leaf blower, it has never looked 10% as good as when it was first installed (It did look wonderful when it was first put down).

The weeds are murder. There’s nothing to do for them. I’ve tried all the home remedies to kill them. For 7 summers when we clean the salt cell with acid, we dump the bucket on the rocks. Fucking morning glory vines still grow there! (In fact, there’s a little morning glory growing there right now peaking out under the new deck stair). The only thing to kill them is the purple Round Up. And that shit’s a hundred dollars a bottle (The purple is much more concentrated than the others). I mix in even more concentrated than the instructions call for. This takes about 2 weeks to fully kill shit. But you know what? It’s still there. Now it’s just brown.

This year, as they were opening the pool (I have a pool guy come remove the safety cover and start it up for me — then he comes back in Fall to close it), I sprayed Round Up. It was nice having someone out there to chat with while I worked. Problem: Poison Ivy. This is the first year Poison Ivy has shown up in the rocks. And I am INSANELY allergic to that shit. I can’t even be around when people are doing yard work because the oils in the air will get on me. So even though it’s been dead for two months, I can’t even weed eat to knock it down. I just call that corner the “Corner of Poor Unfortunate Souls” now. So that really put an impetus on the whole “we need a deck” thing. Anyway, so here’s the before:

That picture is actually it looking really good. That’s after I did the first Round Up and killed everything off. I even already have my plants up on the stairs. I specifically took this picture as a “before shot” when I found out we were building a deck. As you can see, I had to move all the stuff that was over there so they could build. Also worth noting, this square is the WORST for weeds. It must have the perfect combo of sun and water because it’s usually solid morning glory (that’s what you see already coming back under the gutter spout). I actually think it looks so good because I had put down a rug/mat and put my hammock over there. As seen in this post. I love my new hammock. So it didn’t get enough sunlight under that huge mat.

Anyway… this is what it looks like NOW:

Just LOOK at all that usable space! It’s HUGE. It’s something like 21 feet deep and maybe 23ish wide? As you can see, we not only went over the rocks, we took it all the way to the stairs so there wouldn’t be a weird concrete “alley” there. Here’s some side by side before and afters:

They did AN AMAZING job. We had discussed doing the rock square and then cutting over to the stairs — like an “L” shape. But look how he built it out like a giant rectangle with the corner off. It looks so much better than having it cut back in an “L.” Also creates even MORE usable space.

You know, I never realized that we didn’t have a ton of space around the pool. It’s always been fit for needs. When we have parties, we set all the chairs up around the tanning ledge half circle. That’s where everyone puts their stuff and everyone congregates. Now though, this is amazing! We had family over for July 4th and I got out 5 folding chairs to put out and brought over two more umbrellas. Plenty of room:

The other day, K and K2 were over and K2 and I were eating lunch — she sitting by the hammock and me in the hammock chair. K was laying out on a pool float. We still had tons of room for people to join us. Hell, that rug/mat is a 9×12 foot rug!

I also moved my plants off of the stoop and onto the deck. I didn’t think they made the stoop look crowded before, but now everything looks so much more… spread out. Nothing is crowded. There’s SPACE.

And yall, those rocks don’t count as space. You can’t walk on them barefoot. You can’t even really walk on them in flip flops. They’re just too painful. So my hammock chair has always been on the rocks, but I had those four concrete stepping stones to it and under it so you didn’t have to walk on rocks. Now those stepping stones are by the deck to get to the gate.

It’s so amazing to just walk out and sit in the hammock. Even if I don’t want to get out the hammock pad for the super nice full size hammock. I can sit in my hammock chair for a few minutes after watering the flowers or something. It’s just so luxurious compared to what we had. It’s so NICE. Like we have a gorgeous pool. Premium Hydrazzo aggregate finish — gorgeous tanning ledge — full width stairs. It’s a damn nice pool. Now we have the space to spread out by it to match! I mean the rest of the rocks still look like shit, but don’t look over there. You can just walk around. Hell, even after I empty my skimmers into my bucket and go to toss the leaves over the fence, now I don’t have to tiptoe over rocks to do it. I just step up on the desk and toss it over the fence. LUXURY, Yall.

I even got a weatherproof storage box/bench for my hammock pad and a few chairs (also the mosquitos coils and stuff goes in there). And do you see the beautiful sun sail!?

So Husband asked how we would shade it. I said eventually, we could get a sunsail. So I pulled them up to show him what I was talking about. Holy shit, why are sunsails so cheap? That sunsail there is 20x20x28 feet with a full three year warranty for $65 (Amazon link, now it’s $60 plus 5% off). So fuck yeah, we went ahead and bought one. We went ahead and had the builder install a 6×6 anchor post on the other side of the fence and hang it for us. Now, I knew he’d do a good job hanging it – better than I could hire anyone else to do it. He used 9 inch bolts to attach the anchors to the house where the second floor floor-joists are so it aint going anywhere. Now, did I know he was going to charge $300 to hang that sail (in ADDITION to the $300 to install the anchor post) — NO. No, I did not. But anyway — moving on.

I was actually going to get grey or beige but when I asked Husband what color we should get, he said a bright one. Weird for him, but OK! And I LOVE IT. I think it looks fantastic. I’m so happy with it. Unfortunately, due to the curvature on the sail to keep it taught, it’s not actually nearly as big as a perfect 20x20x28 triangle would be. However, where the full sized hammock is remains shaded all day from sun up to sun down. I did not get a waterproof sail because of wind and tiki torch smoke. Mostly tiki torch smoke. If you know, you know. So when I saw that it was just a lightish weave, I was afraid it wouldn’t be shady enough — but it totally is! It says it blocks 95% of UV rays and I believe it. It’s so nice laying in the hammock and looking up at the bright teal and hearing the pool bubblers.

I moved my plants out there too. They had been up on the stoop by the door. They look so good against the dark fence! The bright colors of the coleus really pop! I put the fern by the stair to kind emphasize that stair edge there. I’ve since added a lavender plant from Publix and a tropical looking plant from the nursery. No, I don’t know what the tropical looking plant is. It’s cool and has big leaves. It’s tropical. Speaking of, tomorrow I need to remember to drill a drainage hole in that plant stand. It was full from the rain this week.

But yeah — my deck is AWESOME. I’m so happy about it. I’ll have to get up early this weekend and enjoy my hammock before it gets too hot. Sunday should be great for a pool day! Maybe husband will come sit in the hammock and read to keep me company for a bit?

I’m told to give it at LEAST one month to dry out before we finish it. I’m going to use a sealant/finish combo and make it like a greige color. Have to protect the investment! That shit’s expensive.

Oh, and I didn’t want to pay to move my pool filler’s shut off valve. Because, why? The builder was like, we can just move that. I was like no. I’m not paying for that. So we made a cute little trap door in the deck that you can pick up to access the shut off valve. I currently have a spare key on the pool fence in a lock box. I’m thinking of moving it to install it on the bottom of my trap door. Just for funzies. It’s like a little secret.

Dammit.

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Holy. Shit. So I’m reading Reddit, like I do. It’s a story about malicious compliance. Basically, this guy was getting overheated working and went to get water and his dick manager said no. So he went back to work and purposefully had a heat stroke.

Anyway, in the comments, people were talking about heat intolerance and how every time something like that happens, it can get worse and you tolerate heat less and less. And I’m like wait, tell me more.

Symptoms:

* feeling very hot in moderately warm temperatures

* excessive sweating

* not sweating enough in the heat

* exhaustion and fatigue during warm weather

* nausea, vomiting, or dizziness in response to heat

* changes in mood when too hot

What the fucking fuck! I have all of those except for the not sweating one which is canceled out by the excessive sweating one!

I have literally been diagnosed with sun poisoning before. Twice, random strangers have stopped me, sat me down and brought me water because I looked like I was gonna pass out (once at the ice cream place with friends — but we were by the drive thru so the heat exhaust from the cars was on me PLUS Alabama summer. A lady took me to a bench and sat me down and bought me a water. Then another time, I was leaving a grocery store and someone stopped me to ask if I was OK. I sat down on the curb and they went and got me water and ice).

I’m ALWAYS HOT. I just bought a fan for my desk and told Husband TODAY and K yesterday (she recommended the fan I bought) how pleased I am to have a nice fan blowing on me at work now.

And yall, KNOW I get angry when I’m hot and thirsty like no ones business.

The other day, Husband’s sister, was talking about working in a room with no AC and how she was pretty much OK until it hit 88 and I was like, no shit I WOULD DIE. No way could I work in 80 degrees. No way. And K and K2 can tell yall how I’m basically a water fountain when I work out.

So now I’m like worried, what causes this? They’re talking about underlying conditions — I don’t have diabetes. I am fat — but this was a problem when I was 175 too. I distinctly remember being crazy bitter that everyone said I’d be cold all the time when I lost weight and I WASN’T.

Husband can attest to being freezing in a robe while I have the fan turned on pointed directly at my face in a tank top.

Parkinsons? MS? Gillion Barre?

Graves disease.

Oh FUCK YOU.

Well. I guess now at least we know why I’m hot all the time. I swear to God last time I slept at the InLaw’s it was winter in the NE and I cracked the window and slept under my light weight fuzzy blanket.

I’m not crazy! Just Graves. Awesome.

Reuse and Recycle

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So I’ve been taking excellent care of my tattoo. Only the best lotions and sunscreens. Long sleeves if I’m swimming. Excellent care.

So it occurred to me, I could actually take care of my face too. Right now, in mid summer, my face doesn’t look terrible. That’s because it seems swimming in the pool helps my complexion. Usually though, I have zits and tons of ingrown hairs. PCOS gives me chin and lip and sideburn hair that has to be shaved daily. Every day. So when there’s a zit or something, there’s never time for it to heal. It’s getting shaved over every single day. I don’t wear makeup daily so this makes me very self conscious.

I’ve also got a secret, I don’t use lotion. Yep (or nope?) I never developed a skin care regimen. I don’t even know where to start. But like, I decided I should try it on my face. So I went through all the subscription box stuff I just tossed in drawers over the years and googled easy facial routines. Now I’m doing a routine. Evening: Wash, Toner, Serum, Lotion. Morning: Wash, Lotion with sunscreen. I’m so fancy! So apparently you need cotton rounds to apply toner. So I bought some. But like, these are ugly. How shall I store this?

Oh yeah. That’s right. I’ve been married over a decade, and I finally have a good use for my old leather condom box. Magnificent. I’m so chuffed with my condom box.

Anyway, I’m making an effort here. Does anyone have any advice for sunscreen lotion? I bought some for $18 and it burns my eyes just like every god damn sunscreen I’ve ever put on my face. The only sunscreen I can use on my face is Sun Bum stick. It’s so solid that it doesn’t move or sweat. It’s on ’til you wipe that shit off. Everything else eventually ends up in my eye corners and burns! Help!

Give it to me.

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I went to the Tattoo Expo with K and her boyfriend. I’ve never been to a tattoo expo. We saw some work by legit amazing artists. Then there was one guy who wanted us to get these tiny flash for $200. Are you kidding me? You want to do 10 minutes of line work for $200? NO.

So today ran from 2:00 – midnight. So I figured it would be better in the evening. So we met up at 6:30. And guess what? We missed the good stuff! WHAT THE FUCK? I’m legit going to complain to the organizers. We couldn’t find a schedule for this show anywhere. Big fancy website, no schedules. I even went the the circus people’s website (sword swallowers and stuff) to see if they had a schedule. Nope. Walk in and the first thing they give me is a lovely laminated schedule hour by hour for the whole weekend. Oh look, we missed the circus by an hour! DAMMIT. I’m legit pissed about this schedule thing.

Anyway, none of us were really shopping for tattoos. There were 200 tattooists there from all over. And they do tattoos right there. But I’ve got plenty of work to do on mine as it is. But I tell ya, I did see a lot of flash I liked.

There was a booth of a lady selling crystals — like carved crystals and jewelry and stuff. So K and I were looking at the necklaces. I asked her what was good for anxiety and she hands me a white one. Like the most boring of the stones. But she says it’s good for anxiety and getting rid of negative energy. She said it basically says fuck off to bad energy. Oooo. Give me. The card said it was good for sleep too. White Howlite.

According to some random internet search: “It can help reduce your levels of stress and anger, and dispel anger that is directed towards you from others. Howlite works by absorbing negative energy and filling the void with calming properties that help you feel at peace.”

Yeah, fuck the colors. Give me that.

At least it matches everything.

We’re building a deck!

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We’re building a deck for the pool! I’m so excited! Like, I’m so excited, I think I’ll clean up the chair hammock and give it’s wooden bar a paint refresh. I’m gonna put both hammocks on the deck so when K2 falls asleep in the new one, I can chill in the hammock chair.

And I can have lots of plants ’cause I can water them with the hose now! First on the list is lemon grass! It keeps mosquitoes away. I can only find tiny little lemon grass plants. But when you see pictures, you see big bushy bunches of lemon grass. How do I get that? Do I have to seed it in Spring to get that? Is that a next year thing? I’ve got a big ass pot so I could have a huge bush of it. Maybe even drop a tiki torch in there! Yeah! I asked on nextdoor if anyone has any lemongrass to spare.

Lavender is supposed to be good for mosquitos too (good meaning, they don’t like it). My first priority is keeping mosquitos away from me.

They’re gonna start on the deck next week!

YAY!

That’s some fucked up shit.

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I’m scrolling Facebook and see this Ulta ad:

A vibrator necklace and a Disney bag. Choose a lane, Ulta! Also is that really a vibrator necklace? How small are the batteries? Surely not. I gotta click that shit.

“The iconic necklace that brought together pleasure and self-expression. Crave’s Vesper is designed to enable beautiful experiences in public and in private, both as a statement jewelry and a strong slim external vibrator.”

Benefits

  • Vesper represents beauty, pleasure, and self-expression. As a stainless steel necklace, it enables the wearer to toe the line between subtle and provocative, to create conversations and to openly express their desires
  • With a removable chain, the Vesper easily turns into a slim external clitoral vibe with a rumbly feel and a smooth rounded tip for pinpoint sensation. Not for internal use

That’s some fucked up shit, yall. Don’t be wearing your vibrators out in public. That’s gross. What is wrong with you people? EW.

Happy Hammock

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So I posted about how I had been extremely anxious and too depressed to get off my ass and take care of the weeds around the pool. I did that last weekend. Then I was anxious about all the poison ivy! And I didn’t even want to get my pool stuff out. Well, I made myself do that Sunday. I’m happy to report, I feel better! Do the rocks sill look like shit? Yes. Yes, they do. However, now there’s colorful things to look at to distract from them. I think with the poison ivy problem, they’re not getting raked out this year. It just is what it is. I’ll try to stay on top of them with poison, but I can’t rake it out or weed eat. So I’m kinda fucked with the rocks. Here’s hoping I get off my ass and take care of it.

I put out my hammock too!

Yall, it’s so comfortable. Hammocks are the best. I forgot how comfy they are. I needed a hammock. And I love that this hammock has a removable padded fabric layer. So it’s really comfortable and doesn’t give you rope indentations. Yet, that layer is removable. So it’s always clean! I can just put it away when I’m done and it’ll be clean for next time. No leaves and rain and bird shit. Awesome! Here’s a link to it on Amazon (it was on my wish list). Here’s the stand too if you need the whole setup (link). My in-laws gave it to me for Christmas!

As you can see, I bought a big 9×12′ plastic straw outdoor mat to put it on. I’m hoping now weeds won’t grow threw it. I also like how it makes a nice little Hammock area. The hammock would not look nearly as good just sitting on those fucking rocks. Good thinking, me!

And look how cute mom’s beloved flamingos look where I moved them by the shallow end. They were too cluttered with all the stuff around them. I like just the three. Mom’s original two (with new paint) plus little Stewart who lights up and was a gift from her.

I had today, Monday, off work. I wanted to lay in my hammock but not worry about the sun. So I waited until evening. I used my smoking mosquito coil to keep the bugs away. I still just read Reddit trash on my phone. But I did it outside. Comfortably. And with the sounds of the pool bubblers, it was so relaxing. I came in after sundown when the solar lights all started to come on. It was very nice.

Thankfully, Louie hasn’t figured out he can see me from the window. So far, he just parks it by the door and waits for me to come back in. Tonight, when I came back in, he came running and purring and meowing like I had been gone all day. Lord, if I have to see his sad face in the window, it’s not gonna work.

So who’s coming over for Memorial Day? I haven’t even gotten in yet!

BONUS: Here’s some links to things. I need a freaking Amazon affiliate link, I swear:

Trying to give me a damn heart attack

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Listen. I’m just shitting around trying to delay going to bed. So I decide to look at my checking account. I just wrote a big check for the pool opening and of course paid C for cleaning — I just check sometimes, OK? And they changed their UI. Now it shows pending charges as RED. So when the page pops up my eye goes straight to THIS:

WTF? I’M NEGATIVE MONEY? NEGATIVE MONEY? The overdraft fees gonna be more than that! I have great credit — I can’t remember the last time I overdrafted. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? I’m going to die.

But no, they just changed the colors around. I’m fine. That’s just a pending withdrawal. There is money to cover it. WTF, Wells Fargo? I almost DIED. I used to be poor, Wells Fargo! You’re giving me poverty flashbacks over here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

In other news, Louie found a frog in the house. And he wanted to eat it. I saw him stalking something with the intense butt wiggle. I had to check to see what it was. Demon? Wood Roach? What are you doing? It looked like trash from my spot in the kitchen until IT JUMPED. It was a frog. It came in in my watering can. And now it’s hopping on all the chair legs under the table as I try to catch it while Louie ties to eat it.

Husband came to the rescue. Thank you, husband.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Also, I’m FREAKING OUT about the poison ivy in the pool rocks. I can’t handle it. I sprayed it with the $100 round up on Sunday and it’s not dead. NOTHING IS DEAD. How am I gonna get rid of it? I can’t weed eat poison ivy, I’ll be covered in it! As will the rocks and it’ll get on me every time I’m out there barefoot which I am BECAUSE IT’S A POOL. I can’t handle this. I don’t even want to get out my pool stuff. Cause there’s poison ivy! And I thought about a flame thrower but that will disperse the oils too — I looked it up. I can’t pull it, I can’t cut it, I can’t flame thrower it — WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? This is not OK. I am not OK.

I just wanna put out my Christmas present hammock!

God, I have to go to bed. It’s only Wednesday. I’m not gonna make it.

Sunscreen Ad?

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So today, I read a post my my bestie M on Facebook that got me off my ass. He posted about suffering from ADHD. Particularly “Executive Dysfunction.” Which, I know nothing about. So I can only say what he conveyed about it. He said he would go for days without eating actual food because he couldn’t make his body go to the grocery store no matter how much his brain told it to. He said, and I quote: “it presents externally to the outside world as laziness, it’s actually a WAR between mind and body to get done what you know needs to get done.”

Wait, do I have ADHD? Yall. Listen to WHEN I read this. So I posted the other day about having a legitimate panic attack. I did. I’ve had a few. Because I’m insanely stressed. You know what I’ve been most stressed about? Needing to clean up the backyard around the pool. Hear me out.

So it’s surrounded by rocks. Every year I have to rake out all the branches and leaves and bullshit that piles up in there and not rake out all the rocks. I need to pull weeds. I gotta spray poisons. It’s a huge effort. And the weeds will just come back over and over and over and over again. All fucking summer. It’s a nightmare and I HATE IT. Those pool rocks were the WORST decision we made with this house. Seriously the number one worst decision. I cannot emphasize that enough. The rocks are my #1 regret about this house. Need more closets downstairs? No, IT’S THE ROCKS. No lighting in the backyard for night swimming? Did you hear me say ROCKS? It’s the motherfucking rocks.

If the rocks weren’t there, the yard guy could just mow those weeds along with all the other weeds. Easy peasy! And this years there’s kind a bigger onus on it. I got the hammock and stand I wanted for Christmas — awesome. So like, I need to clean up and put it somewhere. Maybe buy some paving stones to get to it (BECAUSE ROCKS). So like I need to do this thing. And I’ve needed to do it for a month and I can’t make myself do it. Not because I’m having fun. No, I’m not having fun. I’m napping on my couch because fuck, I’ve got so much that needs to get done and I’m STRESSING OUT.

So today, I wake up and grab my phone. Good weather today and tomorrow. Oh no. The forecast of rain was the reason I couldn’t spray the poison. So that means today would be a great day to do the thing. So I stayed in bed for almost 3 hours. Just going “no.” Because if I don’t get out of bed I don’t have to make decisions. HA! Logic. And then I read M’s post about the grocery store. And I realized I have caused myself actual physical pain over not getting this done. Fuck it, I’m doing it.

I didn’t even eat breakfast. I got dressed in my overalls. I ate half a chocolate bar and grabbed some poweraids and went outside. Note, I actually went back inside to put sunscreen over my tattoo — important for later.

So MK was actually opening my pool when I got up! Awesome! So this was a bit late to be getting this done. However, it meant I had he and his daughter for conversation as I did it which was super nice. So I pulled the weeds I could get roots on and sprayed the rest. I did not rake up the leaves and stuff, but just doing SOMETHING was massive. So I’m super happy I got that done. Also, note that I took a LOT longer than I expected. Like a few hours. And I only sunscreened the tattoo. So…. there’s a tan line around the tattoo now…

Not sure if that’s a great advertisement for the sunscreen or not. Maybe? I’d still only give it 3 stars out of 5. It’s mineral sunscreen stick so the zinc very much whites out the area — even though it says “sheer.” It was also very thick. So great for a day on the lake. However, I was hoping it would be a good everyday protection this summer. I’m not whiting out my tattoo everyday. So if anyone has good sunscreen suggestions, send them my way. Highest SPF available if possible. I’ll be swimming in long sleeve rashguards but I need something for general daily wear. This ones great for sweaty activities like yard work. Or I guess swimming, if I was gonna risk that.

Anyway, so I treated the weeds! Finally! But tragic news. This year there’s poison ivy in the rocks. Yall, I’m SEVERELY allergic to poison ivy. I didn’t notice it until I was spraying. Which means I was probably all up in it when weeding by hand. UGH. So after I finished up everything, I dumped everything (even the hat) in a hot wash and hopped in the shower. I recruited Husband to scrub my back for me with the instruction to scrub like you’re trying to peel off a layer of skin. I washed thoroughly like 3 times. My skin was squeaking. So I’m praying I don’t get a rash. Dear god PLEASE no rash and hives. PLEASE.

Husband is letting me get a quote to do a ground level patio/deck and removing the rocks. I have literally no idea the ballpark that would even cost. So our builder is coming over and I’m gonna get him to do a quote for the lower patio (concrete, wood, composite? Don’t care) and then a quote for getting this god forsaken evil rocks out of my life. Hopefully, I’ll meet with him tomorrow. I say hopefully because he was supposed to meet with me Friday and then today and neither happened. PLEASE TAKE THE ROCKS AWAY.

Catfished by a cat?

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Listen, I need to vent. I know we’ve only had Louie for like 5 or 6 weeks. He’s also young, so he’ll change a lot. But… I’m feeling a little catfished.

Remember that snuggly stoner cat in the cat lounge? The cat that just wanted to be held and fall asleep on you? Like if your lap was open it was going to be sat in? This is not that cat. And when I first brought him home and he wanted to be in my face as much as possible? Gone.

I kinda feel like this cat tricked me.

Don’t get me wrong, he’s still a really cool cat. I’m not gonna trade him in for a better model… you know, like one who WANTS TO CUDDLE. Ehem.

Husband refers to him as a “proximity cat.” He enjoys being in the same room as you. Right now he’s sleeping on the couch near me. Proximity. But he no longer wishes to sleep on me or in my arms. Like at all. He either doesn’t sleep in our bedroom or sleeps under the bed. I’m not sure. When I go to bed, I don’t see him again until morning after I wash up. He does not wish me goodnight. (Which BTW, was my most cherished memories with Jack). When I go to bed, he does not come. For a while, when I get up in the middle of the night to pee, he’d come out and let me snuggle him for a bit before leaving. However, the past few nights, I’ve called for him and got nothing. I actually thought Husband might have shut him in the office. But after brushing my teeth and coming out of the bathroom, there he is ready for attention.

The cat likes me. Don’t get me wrong. But he’s certainly a far far far cry from the velcro cat I requested. This isn’t even like cheap velcro. This is like that cheap double sided tape they use in china to stick cheap seasonal decoration bits together that have already separated by the time you get them.

And on top of everything, he likes Husband better than me.

Yeah. I got catfished. Maybe this is why he wasn’t recommenced to me initially. He wasn’t what I wanted. He didn’t “choose” me, he fucking catfished me.

I mean, don’t get me wrong. I just need to vent. I’m upset that he’s not a snuggler. He’s not even sleeping on Husband’s side of the bed anymore. I miss Jack so much. I needed a snuggle buddy. He’ll change. And it’s good that he’s so comfortable to just lounge around where he pleases and not cling to me out of fear.

I don’t think another cat is the answer. If Louie was all over us trying to get attention, I’d say he needs a friend. But Louie is totally cool with just doing his own thing. He loves looking out the windows. And he plays with his toys a lot — just by himself. I got him a motion activated chick. He attacks it and it starts chirping and waving it’s wings and then he just leaves it until hes ready to sneak attack it again.

I like having a cat. I LOVE that he greets me at the door. He does do that. He’s very excited when I wake up (after I’ve cleaned up) and when I get home. It’s just… I feel like he tricked me with all the snuggles and love bombing.

Jack was so fucking awesome.