Seroma… but POOL

So I just realized I never updated. I did, in fact, go to the surgeon last week to have my seroma aspirated. So I do have a seroma (AKA a collection of fluid under the surface of your skin). I waited over an hour in a hot room wearing paper and sweating through it to see the surgeon. He poked around with his fingers and said yeah there was fluid, but there wasn’t a good place for him to aspirate or put the syringe. He said my swelling is coming down and it should absorb eventually with time.

It’s uncomfortable in that I can feel it there. When I stand super straight it feels tight and like I have a big ol’ ball of something there. But it’s not noticeable to other people. And it’s a million times better than having the drain — because I can get in the POOL!

Yep. I waited until it was good and closed before getting in. I’m also getting in my own private pool which I know is extremely clean water and actually over-chlorinated. Were it a public pool, I’d wait longer. But this weekend we had two pool days!

K2 came over Saturday for a super fun Sorted Food live viewing with pool breaks in between. We love Sorted Food on Youtube. So I got us tickets to watch the live streams of their making 3 videos Saturday. It was, quite honestly, funnier than we even expected. And in between episode recordings, we got to hop in the pool. Sunday K had planned to come over but it’s supposed to storm all week, so we thought it would be a wash.

Even Sunday morning I was a bit discouraged that the pool had dropped 3 degrees. But K came over anyway. It turned out to be absolutely perfect. There was the occasional cloud, but super sunny and perfect water for floating around in an eggplant float or swim ring. So it was shorter than we’d like because of schedules, but it was the perfect pool day. Yay!

Oh, and I don’t notice that the implants float anymore than I floated before. In case you were wondering. I was wondering if they would. My breasts aren’t particularly loose or large, so I guess no improved buoyancy. I did point out my spiffy cleavage to my husband but he wasn’t particularly impressed. Only because I had to pad my bathing suits previously. I had to pad them all. So I usually used TWO cup size pads in my bathing suits which made me look much larger in the chest than I was. I threw all my cup pads away last weekend when I tossed my old bras! Woot!

Six Weeks Post-Op

In two days, I’ll be 6 weeks postop from my Breast Lift, Augmentation, and tummy tuck revision. I had my 6-weeks follow-up with the surgeon today. It was a “meh” appointment. The good news is that all of my incisions are healing up beautifully. One breast has dropped nicely and the other hasn’t moved. I have not been concerned about this as I’ve read so many times that they drop at different rates — two breasts, two different surgeries that heal differently. However the surgeon was more concerned.

Apparently, that breast is more tubular. He showed me on my “before” pictures and yep — the dropped breast was wider before. So he said I would have to work to “aggressively massage” them. He also put me in a band. It goes around you and sits on top of your breast to apply pressure downward — you know, pushing the breast down. So that’s all I need — ANOTHER thing to wear LOL.

I showed him my arm scars (from the arm lift in December). They’re keloiding near the elbows. So he gave me some silicone gel to massage into them twice a day. He wants to try that before injections. He gave me a $80 bottle for free, so sure, I’ll try it.

My hips are still comically swollen. Think I’m exaggerating? There’s almost 20lbs of fluid on these babies:

Look at all those layers I have on. That’s my bare minimum layers. Surgical bra, breast band, tank top, binder, underwear, and compression pants. As you can see, I’ve still got my drain. Ah drains, the bane of plastic surgery.

The nurse agreed with me that perhaps trying the bed again and having my hips level with my heart at night will probably help the fluid come down some. She also told me I gotta wear my compression pants. So I got out the compression pants. And let me tell you, getting my fat, swollen ass in those tight pants — Jesus. There was so much pulling and shaking and jiggling and just general unflattering gyrating to get those things up. I’m compressed now, okay?

Note the red glasses I’m wearing. More about those in another post…

Three Week Post-Op

Today I’ll go see my surgeon for my three-week checkup. This is from my breast lift and augmentation and tummy tuck revision. Technically it won’t be three weeks till tomorrow. But you know how doctors work: when they want to.

I’m extremely happy with my tummy tuck. That’s the surgery that has brought me the biggest self confidence boost for sure. Especially with the revision that smoothed things out some more. I still have a belly, but it’s a normal belly and not a melted wax figure belly. I love it. My arms are a struggle. The scaring is significant, especially around the elbows. And they’re still big arms. I have to keep reminding myself how bad they WERE. So when they start to get me down, I pose in the way that would have made all the crepe skin bunch up and drape and I feel better. Plus, eventually, at least one of these will be covered by a tattoo.

I’m not sold or unsold on the breasts. As I’ve said, naked they’re hands down great. But clothed, I don’t feel any umph from them. They’re also still extremely painful so I can’t just model them around and have a look-see. I’m too busy being very careful not to make them hurt. Also there is still a lot of swelling. I should have no side boob. But I have major side boob right now. So I can’t judge them yet. It’s just way too early in the process.

My drains were 60cc and 75cc yesterday so… yeah, not even pretending those are coming out any time soon! But at least this time, ones not partially pulled out and taped up ’cause I nicked it with scissors.

Still sleeping in the recliner in the living room. My master bedroom now looks like a bachelor lives there. Mr C living that single life up there.

Some Things 3/29

1) So today marks two weeks since my breast lift, augmentation, and tummy tuck revision. Tummy tuck, 100% fine. Breasts are extremely tender and achy. Especially if I let myself get cold (which I prefer to do because I’m hot natured). If I get cold, it’s game over – the boobs doth protest. Also I still get a sharp pain on the right with a deep breath. Because he sewed them to my ribs. Can’t wait for that stitch to dissolve! Did not expect to still be in any kind of pain at this point. I thought the boob jobs were easy peasy!

2) I go back to work in 1.5 days. I’m dreading it with all my being. I suck at my job — or at least I feel like I do. I don’t derive any happiness from it. I just feel inadequate.

3) I tried to call my sisters and sis-in-law this morning. As usual, no one answered. They won’t return the calls either. It’s so lame. My brother would answer but he’s so busy and might be at work. I just wanna keep in touch with my family. Also, I just had surgery — you don’t wanna know how I’m doing? I call LAME. Lame flag on the field.

New Boobs Hurt

So yesterday I unlocked a new pain level. I think that at 11 days post op, perhaps some of the dissoluble stitches are giving up the ghost. Maybe? Until yesterday, I felt like I was wearing a tight underwire bra that I’d worked out in and had been wearing for days and it was eating into my skin. I attribute this to the fact that he sewed the breast pocket down to my ribs. For some reason yesterday (or actually the day before) it changed to more of a general, “no it all hurts” now. But less of the wire feeling. I’m just really sore. Like I’ve been severely beat up. Which, I have.

I have a TON of side boob. Which is all swelling due to having my actual side boob removed. So when my arms just hang, they’re pressing on it. It’s like wearing a puffy snow suit of pain. And that sucks. Also when I take a deep breath, it sucks. Not air, but pain. I feel like this is a good thing though — going from a specific point of pain to an overall pain. Like a bruise mellowing out and becoming larger as it dissipates.

I’m insanely swollen in the hips and side boobs. I look like a little fertility goddess figurine. Not in a flattering way.

However, thanks to my nifty blog here, I know that my swelling didn’t start to go down until two and a half weeks post op last time. So that’s par. My drain output increased about 3 days ago by a ton. So not expecting those out any time soon.

I’m basically just parked in the rented recliner (with cat) riding this out. Half of the steristrips on my tummy tuck incisions came off and revealed scabs. I freaked out at first, fearing they would become new openings. However, they’ve stayed just scabs. I’m trying my damnedest to not touch any of the tape around my torso (or, god forbid, nipples). Heal incisions, heal. Don’t have openings. Just heal up nicely.

So that’s where I am. Sore boobs. Gonna make some of that creamsicle jello though. I want something fruity.

One Week Post-Op Breast Augmentation

So it’s been one week and one day since my second plastic surgery. I had my one-week post-op appointment yesterday. Every thing looks good. I’m still in pain. But I switched the prescribed pain killers for Ibuprofen. Not that it really helps. I feel very much like I’ve been wearing an extremely tight underwire bra for days and all I want to do is take it off. At first I thought it was the surgical bra I’m wearing digging into the incisions. So I took it off. Nope. Still digging in.

Well, yesterday I got an explanation. He did a “lateral placation.” Apparently, he stitched the breast pocket to my ribs to hold it in place and keep these big implants (650cc each) up. The right one hurts worse than the left Even taking a deep breath feels like my bra is way too tight. She said I was stitched tight and it would loosen up. Other than that, if I stay in one position long enough, I’m fine. But moving around moves the way gravity pulls on the breasts and incisions and it hurts like flames.

I’ve got incisions almost all the way around! I’m gonna have to tattoo them if they stick out the back of my bathing suits — some non-obtrusive but disguising vine or something. Maybe match my sleeve.

I feel like I went too small. I emphasized heavily that I didn’t want to be bigger than a DD. I didn’t want to have trouble shopping for clothes and bras. But maybe my fat ass could use bigger than DD? I mean in the nude, they’re huge and a completely different look. However, in clothes, they look the same as before. I guess it’ll change when I go back to real bras and clothes. I’m hoping that it will show a lot in a bathing suit. Maybe a push up bra giving me more cleavage will make all the difference.

As far as the tummy tuck revision, it’s going well. I only have one spot where I feel a tug sometimes. And my legs are swollen. I’ve been (and will continue to be) sleeping in the rented recliner so they don’t get the night session of being lower than my heart to drain. So I got out a lot of pillows to prop them up high and brought out the compression socks. I’m really happy with how much he tightened me up. Of course, I’m also extremely swollen. I had switched from a plus sized girdle to a regular, now I’m back in the plus. My hips are huge again! So that’s how it’s going.

She understood the assignment.

I texted my girl friends and asked for some pads to pad my bra. I have very long incisions along my bra line where he removed my side-boob skin (it was lipoed in the first surgery). So with the bra right on those fresh cuts, it’s a lot. So I asked someone to please dear god bring me some pads. The cheapest fattest pad you can find. My ladies understand what I mean — the pads that feel like a diaper. Here’s what she brought me:

K2 understood the assignment. And yes, that’s my favorite ice cream that they don’t sell at my grocery store. This had to be the most embarrassing checkout ever. That’s love.

Then last night K brought dinner and watched some TV with me. Tomorrow A is gonna bring dinner. I’m feeling so loved and supported by my peeps! Thank you all so so much. I didn’t want Mr C to get overwhelmed and it’s working beautifully. (I didn’t send him for pads because he’d have been LOST in the tampon/pad aisle).

Mr C has been great, of course. Today he ran out to get me some iron tablets. He has to keep refilling my waters because I can’t reach out enough to hit the water button on the fridge or lift enough to pick up the brita. So he keeps coming down and filling my water bottles for me. And he keeps moving things to the lower shelves for me like my protein drinks and stuff. And he washed my hair for me. So I don’t want to in any way imply that Mr C has not stepped up to the plate and batted a home run. He totally has.

I just want to thank my girl friends who aren’t legally bound to me who have been helping me out. It means so much to me. I wanna do a gift of some sort for yall. Because really it’s not just the physical sandwich, it’s that you cared enough to help me out. That’s everything. I love yall.

Day 3 Post-Op

I have turned the corner. Yesterday, I started to feel less like fiery hell fire. I know “fiery fire” is redundant, but it is totally applicable in this case. Yesterday, I had a shower and got to see my new boobs. I think I got a good high off of how excited I was so that helped too. K came over with some Firehouse subs that were fucking delicious. And we watched a surprisingly entertaining show call “Is it Cake?” Man, K and K2 are the BEST. I love yall.

Of course, by 8:00pm I was exhausted. I tucked in early but couldn’t sleep to save my life. The hell fire was better, but I still felt like I had the shit beat out of me. Have you ever been in a accident where you got bruised all over? It felt like that. Just like a general “ow.”

I’ve decided that Experel shot was the difference in the surgeries. It gets you past the first three days of absolute hell and then wears off around the turn around point. K is gonna get her boobs reduced and we’re gonna make sure she gets that damn shot. We gonna get her a lift recliner and gonna request that shit specifically by name.

OK Ok Ok, Jack has been rearing to get in my lap while I type this so im gonna let him in. He’s been my recovery partner. I keep a pillow in my lap so he doesn’t sit on my incisions or drains. He just sleeps there and looks cute. I love him.

NEW BOOBS!

Oh my god! I just took a shower so I got my first look at my new breast implants! They’re so good! I’ve only seen them in the bra with all the padding and they look about the same as usual — maybe slightly bigger than when I wore them with padded bras before. But yall, they’re not. They’re real boobs. On my chest. And I’m really swollen again in the hips so I basically look like a badly drawn sexy character.

I’m so excited I want to send nude pictures to all my girl friends but I’m resisting. When I get the drains out I can take pictures in the two piece bathing suit I took before shots it. The difference is HUGE. I love them.

Day of Surgery Number 2

So it’s 5:30 in the AM. I’ve already downed 40 ounces of recovery drinks per instructions. I’m about to hop in the shower and get ready for plastic surgery round 2! Breast lift and augmentation, removing extra skin around the sides on the bra line, and a tummy tuck scar revision (where he hopefully takes more skin).

I’m not worried about the breasts. I really want to talk to him before surgery about the revision. There’s a good chunk of scar tissue where that stitch popped and I had an opening that I want him to cut out. Also, I want him to take a lot more skin from my mons area. And of course I’m worried something bad could happen. Fucking Ides of March.

I’m also worried about my sweet Mr C getting overwhelmed taking care of me. I hope I’ll be able to take care of myself a good bit. I feel pretty good though. It’s not an over-nighter. The lift recliner was delivered yesterday. I’ve got two weeks off work for recovery. And I’m gonna look great in a bathing suit!