Category: Work

Bringing Joy & Passive Aggressive Teams Icons

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 2 Comments on Bringing Joy & Passive Aggressive Teams Icons

Yall, I’m so petty, and I have NO SHAME. So, if you are blessed enough to work telework at all, you are familiar with the Zoom and Teams meetings. The little squares or circles of peoples initials. Most people don’t bother to upload a picture. If you’re REALLY lucky, someone uploads their pet as their icon.

One afternoon I ran into a girl with pink hair at work and recognized her from her icon — because pink hair. And I was like OMG! I’ve been debating what to make my icon. Like do I go professional, tattoo, or pet? Cause I do love the pets. Well, I went pet. Classic Louie with the sunglasses. That’s been my icon for months. People recognize me by it. I’ll introduce myself in person and say “I’m the cat with sunglasses!”

So I usually hop into meetings a few minutes early just so I don’t lose track of time. One meeting a while ago — we were still a few minutes from start and I joking said “oh man, we already have two cats and a dog — this is gonna be a good meeting.”

Well, asshole chimed in that he prefers people to use their faces so he knows who people are. I just joked it off that I prefer animals.

Yall, this motherfucker’s picture is a black and white selfie in sunglasses and a ball cap that had to have been taken 15-20 years ago. — Just for the full picture.

Then he’s mentioned it in two meetings since. The last time, he called me out directly. It was a meeting with nothing remotely related. I was talking about requirements and he said something like “I’ll agree if you stop using your cat for an icon” or something. IN THE MIDDLE OF A MEETING WHERE WE WERE HAVING PROFESSIONAL DISCOURSE. So, I snapped back that I’ll change mine when he shows his face as in his own icon as he’s got a hat and sunglasses on. He says he’s perfectly recognizable in his. I disagree.

So today, he has pissed me off. He does that a lot. So TODAY, since it’s OCTOBER, I changed my icon to Louie with batwings and a pumpkin (from last year). It’s Microsoft, so it will take a while to trickle down through the various apps.

Yall. What can I do for Thanksgiving and Christmas? I gotta get under his skin REAL GOOD. How can Louie reflect Thanksgiving?

It’s got to be funny and cute because normal people will find this adorable and a bright spot in their day to see my cat dressed up in the work meeting. And every time someone compliments it, it will FUCKING KILL HIM INSIDE. So we need max cuteness.

WHAT IS THIS? A school for ANTS?

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on WHAT IS THIS? A school for ANTS?

Look at this hat, yall. I’m looking for a new pool baseball cap. So I searched for “Baseball hat ponytail.” Amazons fucked up algorithm showed me a “men’s baseball cap” first (Sponsored ad, of course) and this abomination:

My scalps gonna burn right through that damn thing. AND no ponytail elastic — FAIL.

OK WAIT — before we move on — what the actual fuck is this? This one doesn’t protect your scalp or block the sun from your eyes. Why does this abomination exist?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anyway, new topic. Also, I do understand the irony in this next situation.

So did you read my last post about how life saving and amazing my new BedJet is? Well, you just got the summery. So it blows air into a cloud sheet to keep you cool under the covers. Awesome. Until…

Yeah. Four times now, I’ve woken up a sweaty mess because Louie is blocking the air vent. Is Louie doing this to be near me? Fuck no he’s not. Louie isn’t a mushy lover. He has NEVER slept on my side of the bed (on occasion when we sleep late and he’s waiting for me to get up and feed him, he’ll be on the bed — on Anthony’s foot corner). And he’s not sleeping with me — hes RIGHT on the air output.

So nearest I can figure, It’s the vibrations or noise? The only place I feel anything from the BedJet is right there at the outlet — you feel the air blowing inside the sheet and therefor against your feet so it’s kind of a waveform/vibration feeling.

If he was on either SIDE of the airjet, it wouldn’t be a problem. However, hes completely blocking any air from dispersing into the sheet. This is a problem yall.

Yeah I get it hahaha, that’s so funny.

NO IT’S NOT. I’m SWEATING. I’m hot. Today, after I took this picture, I had to get out of my PJs and put on new underwear because I was so sweaty. I had a good thing and now I don’t. How do I fix this?

I just moved the nozzle to the side of the bed in hopes that maybe that will help? I don’t think it will, but we’re gonna find out. Is there a fabric that he would find very uncomfortable? Keep in mind that covering the counters in parchment paper had zero affect on him. Like would he do it on a tarp? Is there an very offensive pointy side of the velcro fabric?

And yes, I get the irony. For over a year, I’d wish and wish that he’d want to sleep in bed with me. Now it’s NOT COOL. I didn’t even intend that pun there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lastly, an update: Our floor is getting fixed! They’re coming to pack up our entire first floor including kitchen appliances and move it all into the garage. They’ll be here Wednesday at 8:30am. So this is great!

And terrifying. Cause this week they’ll move stuff and fix all the dry wall. Then they wont start on the floor until like next week. I think next Wednesday? Or was it the NEW floor is going in Wednesday? I don’t know. But multiple week thing. Gotta move all our shit. Living upstairs and out of the garage. For lunch and breakfast, I gotta go in the garage where my fridge is and pass workers. I’m not looking forward to this.

Also, the mold remediation with the loud fans did something to Louie. It fucked him up. He’s all jumpy and scared of noises now. So we gotta get rid of him before any of this goes down. We can’t traumatize the cat again. So K is gonna take him in Tuesday night. But it’s gonna be MORE THAN A WEEK. And I already feel so bad leaving him! And also, like how often do I visit? Like I’m lazy and I don’t wanna go visit all the time — but he IS my cat and she doesn’t live far away. So like how often is often enough to not feel guilty? You know the answer is no amount. I will feel guilty no matter what.

So I did up a huge list of shit that’s gotta be done because I am stressed. Today, I wanted to lay on the couch and be a depressed crying blob of anxiety paralysis. However, my sweet husband kept looking at my list and going “hey we can do this” — and doing a lot of it himself. Like we tidied up the garage and got a table ready with the toaster oven. We clipped Louie’s nails. We put the card table in the master bedroom and moved all the plants upstairs. Then we took a nap and I planted some plants.

Yall, this week at work is also gonna be a SHIT SHOW. A fucking huge shit show dumpster fire. It’s not good.

STRESS

Snake in the Grass

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 1 Comment on Snake in the Grass

OK, I came here to post a review about cat hair cleaner. But I can’t I gotta talk about something else. Something bigger. Something fucking huge and infuriating and disgusting. I was going to post about it when I had time to reread the initial email and use quotes but fuck it — here we go.

First, yall know I don’t like people. People suck. They only give a fuck about themselves. But I don’t live in fear of people. I don’t expect every person I walk past to stab me, I just think they’re probably a selfish asshole or a dumbass until they prove otherwise. I’m actually a nice person. Despite the fact that I’m bitter and shit. I’m also southern. We’re nice down here. So let me tell you — when I got fucked over SO DAMN HARD this week, it was actually a shock.

Like, damn, I knew she was a bitch — but I didn’t know she was snake in the grass. What the fuck? Who DOES THAT? Bad people.

Like I know, my moral compass doesn’t line up with yours. But my moral compass is strong. I have values. I have rules you just don’t break. I have unacceptable. And this… holy fucking shit.

So. The Snake has come after me. There’s this bitch at work (previously “bitch” — now we’re out of curse word range. Like she has passed jovial words at this point). No one wants to deal with her. I only deal with her when I have to. No chatting. Just emailing each other questions to get the job done. We don’t work in remotely the same department or line of work, so we don’t even interact that much. I have no idea of her work location. I’ve never spoken to her over voice chat, phone, or in person. She’s just one of those people you have to deal with sometimes. And whenever you ask her a question, she’s almost always a bitch about it and says that’s not her job or you should already know or some shit. And she’s always blaming my group (of 2 — but mainly me) for shit to customers. And she’s rude as fuck to customers. Like this bitch is so rude, I’ve complained about it to my boss multiple times. And yeah, I have the receipts because some were in writing.

But everything was fine. Sometimes you just work with bitches and assholes. You just try to avoid them. You ask other people when possible. Or when you get a snappy reply you just forward it to your boss and ask for help.

Yall know I don’t give 2 fucks about work. Work isn’t my life. I don’t get my kicks and personal satisfaction from work. I just wanna do my job and go home. My boss knows this. I’m pretty positive I said it in the interview. So you know that I don’t have enough fucks to give to be mean to someone. One, I’m not mean. Two, I don’t shit where I eat. Three, I can’t be bothered. I just need the information to do my job so I can go home and pet my cat. And as far as I know, until this week, this person quite liked me. I COULD be wrong. I’m not sure when her attitude changed about me.

It might have happened early this week. She sent an email about some paperwork she’s corrected on the last 4 things I’ve submitted. My coworker was copied on it and gets in way earlier than me so there were already some back and forths on the chain before I joined in. So I get it and go — my bad, I’m a dumbass. I didn’t even KNOW there were multiple of that thing — I’ve literally been copying and pasting from the last one I submitted. Can you send me the different ones and what they are for? (Obviously the email was longer and didn’t curse).

So as is her normal, she responded with a bitch of an email. Like 4 paragraphs that started with something like “Mrs C, you have been on countless emails where I have sent blah blah blah blah blah. You should know blah blah blah blah blah. It’s not my job blah blah blah blah blah. I sen out an email months ago blah blah blah blah.” And never actually gave me the information. Just said I already had it and should know it. And she reiterated that she’s corrected it on my last 4 submissions and she doesn’t call people out on every little thing because she’s not that kind of person. She will only call someone out when it’s a repeated error and so they might need a better understanding of the process.

So I replied back. I did not curse. I was totally politically correct. And I was a BITCH. There were TWO “per my last email”s and one “per your last email” and one quote from her last email that I referred to as the “antithesis of helpful.” It basically came down to “per my last email, I’m a dumbass and never knew that there were multiple of that thing. Per your email, you only point things out when someone needs a better under standing of the process. I’m telling you directly that I need a better understanding of the process. Saying “blah blah blah blah blah you already know” if the antithesis of helpful. I will ask you again as per my last email, please send me the things and what they are for.”

And this isn’t in some vacuum. There’s at least 5 people on this email chain. So one of them pipes in with hey hey hey, lets step back and turn things down a few notches. Why? Because I’m never so rude and it was obvious (on purpose) that I was DONE.

***** Inserted later — oh an earlier that morning she had emailed my boss (without me on it) complaining about my charging overhead on my time card. She was super mean and spiteful and said STRAIGHT OUT that I should not be allowed to work without a direct charge code — even though she had literally started a email complaining about me doing something wrong that morning so she knows I’m working. And she DEMANDED an explanation. Well, my boss is awesome and this snake has no level to demand shit from her — so she COPIED ME in her 5 word response that she had already talked to X about it. So my email of politically correct direct fire also included that she knew, “from her curt email this morning about my lack of charge codes” that I was doing work for programs I was unfamiliar with and that’s why I didn’t know about the things. *****

Has anyone sent me the thingies or where to find them and when to use them? Nope. Still nope. Because that would be helpful.

So Wednesday, I go for an in person meeting. Before the meeting, I swing by my boss’s office to ask her about one of these submissions (new one). Like I said, I try to avoid asking the snake stuff if I can. So we discuss it, she’ll reach out to this other person to get the answer cause neither of us know. And then at the end, she’s like “hey, when this person if making you mad, let me handle it. And NEVER drop the f bomb in an email to her.” And I’m like OK. I curse a lot, but I never curse in email so whatever. Check, boss. And she says that she complained that I kept dropping the F bomb in emails which I suspected to be untrue but couldn’t prove right then. So then we went to our meeting.

So hours later, I get home. I immediately check my emails I’ve sent to her. Nothing. So I PDF every single email I’ve ever sent her and send it to my boss. I tell her I find it concerning that this person has complained about me twice that I know of and that I have not: 1) ever incorrectly charged my time or 2) cursed at her via email. I DID go through my entire chat history with her and had used two curse words (in a year, pretty impressive). I screen capped those two occurrences and attached those as well to be fully transparent.

(For the record, they weren’t AT her. One of them was me AGREEING with her that that was “fucking” stupid of them to do.)

Then, I message my coworker and tell them that this person is a lying snake in the grass! I checked EVERY EMAIL with her in the “To” line and not a SINGLE ONE had a curse word. I used advanced search functions. And coworker says “yeah, but at least we don’t have to deal with her as now we’re to copy boss on EVERYTHING”. And I’m like wait, what? She didn’t tell me that. When did she tell YOU that? And coworker says boss called. And something about a complaint. So I’m like wait wait wait — WHAT?

    So I call my boss. Me and my boss get along great. I’m like um… what’s happening?

    So boss tells me that snake sent an email to HER division director and my boss (who is my division director because I’m missing a lot of people in my chain of command — I refused to take the position of my own boss even though I could). So like she skipped from zero to overboard already by never saying anything to anyone and jumping to directors. So my boss is cool. She says “I can’t SHARE this email with you, but I can SHOW you it.” So she screenshares the snakes email to all these directors. (I screenshot it, don’t tell).

    YALL. YALL.

    YALLLLLLLLLLLL.

    When I got off the phone I SCREAMED for my husband to come look at this. Not that I was screaming at HIM — I was just screaming because WHAT THE FUCKING GOD DAMN FUCK IS THIS BULLSHIT?

    She sent an email as a victim. That she has sat on this overnight to think about before saying anything. But she’s put up with this for too long. She’s kept it to herself and only talked to AAA about it (*AAA loves my ass, BTW). She tried to ignore it as she’s a peacekeeper, but Mrs C has created a toxic workplace. She can provide “at least 25 emails” of Mrs C being horribly rude and hateful (or something, I refuse to go upstairs to read this lying piece of shit again). That no one should dread work this much and that it has come to where she comes to work in a state of fear. She used all the key words — harassment, fear, toxic work environment.

    Coincidence that we had training on this like last week and she knows the supervisors are required to elevate this up the chain? Oh I think not. She filled that email with so much lies and bullshit and made sure to use EXACTLY the right key words to get my ass in huge trouble.

    Snake came after MY JOB. Like FOR REAL. With an email of LIES.

    LIES YALL. 100% LIES.

    And my boss was ON the chain of emails that started this. And I had already sent boss every email I’ve ever sent this woman. I went through them — they’re all just questions. Mostly when I was super new and didn’t know shit. Absolutely ZERO kick back until that last email. And absolutely ZERO inappropriate language. So I’m like BOSS, you gotta forward that email to her director! I literally HAVE ALL THE EMAILS. If she’s going to accuse me of this, I want receipts! Tell her to provide those 25 emails! I give you full permission to send that PDF of emails out as proof.

    Boss is cool and just trying to calm me the fuck down. She’s like don’t worry about this woman. If it was some other director, we’d have a problem — but her director knows how she is and I know you so we’ve already talked about it. Worst comes to worst, you’ll have to be sat in a room together with us and HR and hash it out. And I’m like “I can’t sit in a room with her and not call her a blatant liar to her face” — Boss says that’s cool as long as I don’t curse.

    So now I’ve been in a panic since Wednesday. Like, my job is not at risk. I know that. My boss loves me and NEEDS me. Also, I have receipts. Crazy snake doesn’t have receipts. I also have receipts of emails I sent my boss complaining about this woman’s unprofessionalism. I wonder if she ever complained about me?

    Like yall, I’m gonna have stroke any minute now. I can’t NOT THINK ABOUT THIS. Husband is like “you can’t fixate on this” and I’m like ‘WOULDN’T YOU?”‘ To which he says yes, and that’s why he knows how bad it is.

    I don’t want boss to sweep this under the rug. I WANT this to go to HR and I want to go pay staples to print out binders of EVERY GOD DAMN SINGLE WORD I’ve spoken to this woman so I can collate and earmark it with colors and put it in front of everyone in the room as MY RECEIPTS and ask her to show where I’ve harassed her? Where I’ve made her “FEAR” me? I’ll even highlight the TWO times I cursed and sincerely apologized because, yes I was wrong. It wont happen again and wish she’d have told me it offended her. And I’ll use one color — maybe green? — to mark all the times she’s praised working with me and how thorough I am.

    Do I need to sign up for the union? Seriously? Like am I being stupid thinking this isn’t HUGE because my boss has my back and these are obviously all lies?

    But honestly, before I sent her every email in PDF format with assurance there were no “F bombs.” — boss probably believed her. Because I do curse casually. So she’s using this one truth — Mrs C is casual and curses a lot to wrap up this huge lie of my harassing her and making her fearful of me.

    Yall, I CALLED coworker so we could speak off the record and prefaced this with, can we talk off the record as friends here? And told her ALL of this. She was APPALLED. She was like — “how can you create a toxic work environment when yall don’t even work together?”

    I KNOW, RIGHT?

    And she’s been on almost every email I’ve every had with this woman. None of them are rude (except for that last one when I purposefully owned her ass). She said that Snake is just mad that I threw her words back at her. She’s like an uncle I have — can dish it all day but can’t take a single bad word back. Husband had already said he same thing. And it is true — everyone knows how bitchy she is and just ignores her.

    Yall, I’M DYING OVER HERE. I know people are pieces of shit. I know it deep down in my soul. But for someone to randomly just go from zero to threatening MY JOB? Holy shit. What kind of person ARE YOU? It’s like, man I’d be less insulted if someone pulled a gun on me to rob me. Like if you shot me, I’d be less insulted. Because on my morality scale, that just makes you a druggie that shoots people. I’d just take you to court and hope you got prison time. To to be so… slimy. So… disgusting. So two-faced. Just… wow. To just blatantly throw out a shit full of lies and threaten someones job because they hurt your feelings, I guess? I mean holy fucking shit.

    This is why I curse so much yall. There is ONE VERSION of Mrs C. I’m never gonna surprise you. You’re gonna be like “yep, saw that coming.” Because holy fuck, these snakes in the grass. At least someone robbing a bank just owns that they are robbing a bank. Does this snake see how bad her actions are? Does she think life is just some game where you can be a “mean girl” and toss around such accusations at your whim? How can you do this to someone?

    I can’t believe I’m so shocked that someone is a scumbag. Like Mrs C, you knew she was a bitch. But yeah, I knew she was a bitch, yeah. I didn’t know she was… THIS.

    You know whats funny? He has now harassed ME. SHE HAS CREATED A TOXIC WORKPLACE. I’m now scared to email HER. How fucked up is that?

    Laugh at my Failure

    Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 2 Comments on Laugh at my Failure

    Yesterday, I had an email thread I fucked up so very badly, that I’ve been sharing it with people to cheer them up. Because hey, I fucked that up like three ways — you should get a laugh and realize we all fuck up and look like dumbasses sometimes. Enjoy.

    First, if you’re not someone who has known me long enough to realize it — I get words mixed up. I meet a Kevin or a Keith? Fuck no, they’re both 5 letters that start with a K — it’s not happening. My brain cannot process this. This happens a lot where I mix up words based on what they start with — sometimes going so far as to be the phonetic start and no the actual letter. My husband has become an excellent mind reader when I do this. Context clues, people! So with that in your head:

    Wednesday, we had half of a team flying in to tour and meet up with the other half of the team. So I’m tagging along to tag up with my other half. This is an all day event. I’ve told everyone I’m busy all day and my status shows as busy. But I still have my good old leash. It’s a fucking iphone and I hate it because I’m an android person – CAN I GET A PIXEL? It’s half the fucking price! That has nothing to do with this though.

    So where was I? So I get a TEAMS message asking me to email Shelby about the A1111 program funding. OK, I can do that. First, I ask for a last name and they’re like “it’s in your email.” Well, outlook on the iphone doesn’t have a goddamn search feature so is it SO HARD for you to type the damn name? It literally takes less strokes than writing out “It’s in your email.” So I’m thinking ShelbyA but this is a different Shelby. Also, note that I do more budget shit that anything else. I’m a configuration manager with experience as a software engineer and a computer science degree — why am I pushing contract money? So keep in mind also that I’m pushing money for shit I have nothing to do with. I don’t work these programs, I’m just submitting the contracts for the people who do.

    So I email Shelby and ask about funding for the A2222 program real quick during my lunch break. They reply:

    “Ma’am, I’m the POC [Point of contact] for the A1111 program.” Fuck.

    So I’m flustered, embarrassed, and still don’t have a lot of time here to deal with emails so I reply with something close to:

    “Ma’am, I sincerely apologize. I intended to ask about funding for A1111.”

    They reply with the fact that they’re not continuing funding, they told my boss this last week, and….

    “ALSO, I’m a man. Shelby is a unisex name.“

    Fuck me.

    How much dumber can I look to this person? Also, I didn’t even KNOW Shelby was a unisex name. In fact, I didn’t believe it so I googled that shit. Apparently it’s Norse and it means “from estate by the willow.” Ok, Viking name, badass. But how much did you get made fun of in school?

    I’m southern — so when I hear Shelby, it’s Shelby from “Steel Magnolias” played by Julia Roberts. It’s a fucking fantastic, classic movie. If you live in the South, you know this movie by heart. Highly recommend. Look at the cast!

    StarringSally Field, Dolly Parton, Shirley MacLaine, Daryl Hannah, Olympia Dukakis, Julia Roberts, Tom Skerritt, Dylan McDermott, Kevin J. O’Connor, Sam Shepard
    (I copied this from wikipedia and the links came along. You’re welcome, I guess?)

    Also, the red velvet armadillo grooms cake? That shit is fucking GOLD.

    Anyway, ShelbyA is also a female. I’ve never known a male Shelby. But then my husband points out some fancy sports car named after a Shelby and I’m like “but have you seen Steel Magnolias?” He has not.

    So there you go.

    It’s the end of the world as we know it.

    Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 2 Comments on It’s the end of the world as we know it.

    Please be sure to sing that title as REM would.

    So yesterday, I posted about how my car was 10 and needed a cleaning. Well, this weekend is my long weekend and my Friday plans I was excited about got damned, so I can clean my car! I looked up the weather. Nice. I’m gonna do this. I’ll clean the inside too! So I’ve got outside car stuff, I wanted to get the Armor All wipes for the inside. I don’t like bottled cleaners — wipes are so convenient. So I go to Amazon.

    I find what I need and put it in my cart. We’re checking out — when’s this gonna arrive? NEXT TUESDAY? What the fuck? Six days? SIX DAYS? On a prime item!? Are you kidding me? You also have raised your prime cost multiple times and now put commercials in my shit. Not cool, Amazon.

    So if I don’t wash my car this weekend, it aint getting done. So I figure — Walmart pickup. I get everything in my cart for pickup. I’ll grab it tomorrow cause I gotta go into the office. Then it’s like Walmart turned into a shiny demon … in the middle of the road. AND HE SAID

    “Want this delivered?

    For free?

    Today?”

    That’s right, bitches. Walmart plus is free for the first month with free same day delivery. If you choose to keep it, it’s only $13 a month after that. Oh AND it comes with Paramount+. Wait, don’t you already pay a hundred dollars a year for Paramount+? “hisssssssssssss.”

    And here’s my shit. On my counter.

    That’s right. I even added some heavy cat litter and frozen pizzas. Got here in a few hours — only that long because I didn’t give a fuck so chose a time that it said was a “slow time.”

    And this is the license plate frame I’m gonna go with:

    So yeah, Amazon is going down. You know I’m always way behind on trends so if I’m here — they’re done for. And have you seen all the articles and videos about how Amazon is just filled with drop shippers and fake Chinese knock offs now? You don’t see quality name brands on Amazon anymore. They’ve made it nearly impossible to sell on their platform for legitimate businesses and they don’t care. They want you to buy the cheap Chinese junk. And most of what you see is “Sponsored” shit that doesn’t even match your search inquiry well.

    Dammit. I hate Walmart AND Amazon. But I need convenient and FAST. Amazon Prime and Walmart+ prove that people will pay more for the speed. Can I get Home Depot in on this?

    Also, I had the “End of the World” music video mixed up in my head with the “Bad Day” video which I always found funny. So BONUS TRACK:

    It’s been an absolute fucking shit show of a week in the C household so it’s appropriate too.

    MY ROCKS!

    Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 3 Comments on MY ROCKS!

    To really capture the excitement I have over these fabulous rocks, let me transcribe the text messages my three besties and K’s biologist S.O. got from me today: Ehem:

    ~~~~~~~~~begin~~~~~~~~~

    “OH MY GOD. I got my rocks and they are better than I imagined!”

    **Insert five more pictures of close ups of the various color groupings — ask if you want to see those***

    “There’s three types of Obsidian and they’re so distinct! The Gold Sheen Obsidian doesn’t look special until you hold it up to the light and, well, gold!”

    “And what’s the Blue Sand Stone that looks like GLITTER”

    “Hematite is heavy as fuck”

    “The Opal is so gorgeous”

    “OH MY GOD, you have to come over so I can show you my favorites”

    “Look at the glitter in this one!”

    “This is genius marketing. Like, I know these are the chips that come off [when they’re] making those carved stone skulls and angels and shit. They took their scrap and marketed it and I AM HERE FOR IT.”

    “Look at this Citrine!” ***Insert picture of Citrine***

    “Look at this, it’s pure black when not in the light”

    “Oh and Louie got a window bed in my office”

    “Opal was moms favorite”

    ~~~~~~~~~end~~~~~~~~~

    So needless to say, I was so excited! I’ve wanted these for months. And they weren’t expensive — Click here for the amazon listing for $41.99 plus a $5off coupon you can click. Gift giving season was coming up and I thought they were a good price point for a gift. They were at the TOP of my wishlist. Birthday, Christmas — Husband got me the shelves I picked for them to go on for my birthday, but no one gifted me the rocks! I figured surely husband would get the Christmas. Nope. It might be the fucking lame ass marketing. The Amazon name is “Consine Witchcraft Supplies, A Set of 49 Different Gemstones Crystals in Glass Bottles, Crystal Chip Natural Reiki Healing Stones, Random Stuff Witch Crystals for Meditation Therapy and Witchy Decor”

    I suppose they are getting those hippy hits and all the Wiccans with this advertising, but some of us just like rocks, OKAY? Geology is fucking amazing! I can’t afford to actually own all of these beautiful stones. It would be an awesome collection though. It would also be a bit disorderly with stones of different sizes, and how would I label them? But when I saw THIS? Oooooooo ho ho. All the rocks in beautiful uniform little glass jars? Fuck yes. Give it to me.

    Fucking genius marketing. Taking SCRAPS and selling them off. They just tossed their scraps in a tumbler (some aren’t even tumbled, actually — but most are).

    The little jars are only 2 inches tall. I scoured Amazon for the perfect shelves for them. Honeycomb shelves! Are they made for Essential Oils? Yes. Fucking hippies all up in my shit. Husband gifted me the shelves for my birthday and they look great in my office! I even bought a cheap package of empty vials to set on the shelves (click for link. $8.99 I need an affiliate thing) — but I also plan to fill them with other things. Maybe other stones? Sand from Florida; Sand from Maine. Two are already filled with broken bracelets — one is pearls of different colors.

    NOW LOOK AT MY OFFICE!

    Of course, I already need more shelves. Maybe for Valentines 😉 Though I can’t find the white on Amazon anymore, so I might have to get the brown (click) and paint them all a uniform white.

    I arranged the rocks by color for the shelves. First black to white to browns:

    Then the prettiest shelf is reds to pinks to oranges to yellow to greens:

    Then flowing with the rest of the greens into the blues and purple:

    Are the labels jank? Yes. Yes they are. I might fix them at some point. It would be a lot of effort. But I could get some cute tiny printable labels (maybe in silver or gold?) and print them. Then put them on STRAIGHT and at the same level all across. That would also cover the miscellaneous jars I add. It’s an option I am considering. I was going to shelve them with the labels facing the wall, however, I don’t know their names. I also want to show people my favorites. As you can see from the shelf pictures, the Gold Sheen Obsidian and Blue Sandstone are AMAZING in the sunlight, but look bland and black on the shelf. Same with the Garnet and Blood Stone (though it’s more the lighting in the picture for the Blood Stone).

    So yes, I am THRILLED. I love them. Guess what else? I rearranged my office today. My desk was facing the window. Theoretically, so I could look out the window. But work let me borrow these huge-ass monitors and I see no window. Also, Feng Shui says you should face the door to be in a position of power.

    So I rotated my desk. Now I’m facing the closet and door — really the closet. But, the closet is blocked by my monitors. Now I’m sitting right next to the window with a nearly full view of the pool. And to my left is my wall of happiness — including my rocks.

    And believe it or not, I also knocked a big very visible work task off my list today. I fucking love my office. You know what I can do? ADD CAT SHELVES. Husband won’t let me anywhere — BUT NOW I HAVE MY OWN ROOM.

    OH MY GOD!

    PS: Link to Louie’s new bed. He fucking loves it. Came with two covers that velcro on. No screws or anything required. You do have to have a functional window that opens though. It hooks into the window slot and braces against the wall. Oh the price has gone up to $22.90 since I ordered it — still totally worth. Clicky.

    PS #2: I’m trying to change directorates (kinda like getting a new job completely — just less paperwork). If it works out, maybe they’ll let me work more than 2 days from home a week!

    PS #3: On researching Blue Sandstone:

    “Blue Sandstone (also known as Blue Goldstone) is a man-made stone made up of natural minerals (quartz sand, copper, gypsum and feldspar) Although this stone is man-made, its infused with naturally occurring minerals found in nature”

    “Are you referring to the dark blue stone with a shimmering/sparkly star-like effect? If so, it’s also referred to as “blue goldstone” and a couple of other names.

    This material is primarily silica glass. Some people make the glass from sand, which is why one name used is sandstone. The elements used change the colour; I think blue goldstone uses cobalt instead of the copper used in the brown version.”

    Tasting that Telework Life

    Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Tasting that Telework Life

    I’ve been tasting the telework life, and yall, it is sweet. I’ve been given permission to work two days a week from home. So I chose Monday and Tuesday. Then last week, we were iced in and had to work from home all week long. It was fucking amazing.

    I can sleep super late because I don’t have to get dressed or drive in. I can wake up and be on a meeting in 5 minutes. Does that piss Louie off because he has to wait for his breakfast? Yes, it does piss him off.

    Also, I can be comfortable. I have a foot rest under my desk. I fucking love having my feet up. And no ones gonna creep up and catch me talking to myself or fucking around or just looking like shit. Plus, I love my office! It’s the board game room. I added some shelves to move the books off of the game shelves and sprinkle in my own things. And I love my shelves of nick-knacks!

    Today, I did some more obsessive tweaking of where everything goes. I wanted to make room for my yarn stash for crochet. I have a ton of yarn for the never-ending Christmas blanket, plus the leftovers from other projects. I moved around the books too. I rearranged the crappy mis-matched books by height and it looks much better. And I moved some shelves around that were stuff before and made them books so the stuff is more spread out. Don’t worry. If I need more space, I will not hesitate to buy another cheap Target shelf.

    Yes, the pillow is on the floor so Louie has more room in the chair. He was crowded, OK?

    I love my office. I love stuff. Stuff stuff stuff. I’m a stuff person. I mean do you SEE The Professional Leon-Mario crossover down there waiting to assassinate someone? Lord Concord, Star Trek Figures, my Mini Masters Jayne? All my Witcher books, that was an adventure! Notes from mom, photo booth photos of Husband and I. And my precious Penny Arcade Goombas I traded for at PAX! I got that little orange elephant keychain with mom when I took her to the chinese lantern festival at the Botanical Gardens! D & C were there and we ate at the Highway Kabbobery food truck while we watched a live martial arts play in the grass. Baby Yoda is wearing my wedding tiara that I’m wearing in that photo there — the famous texas hair photo of my momma.

    There’s other stuff in there too. There’s the giant stuffed blue shell K2 gave me on the game shelf. And my desk has a sweet Bob Ross bobble head circled with the glass worry beads mom brought me back from Greece. Also the Goomba Fate sent and a special edition Funko Pop set of Crowley and Aziraphile. Plus a fake succulent with a tiny goomba tucked in the center. Like a wheres-waldo but with goombas.

    I even have a light up cat ball that K gave me for Christmas. I had to plugged into the monitor and yall, I’m so stupid. So I have two huge new government issued monitors. I plugged the cat ball in to one. It happens to be the one that just won’t be turned on by the dock. The right monitor springs to life every time, but you have to turn the left one off and back on again for it to recognize it has a signal. The power button happens to be by the cat ball. So I noticed the cat ball turns itself off after a while — nice feature. Also, it appeared to detect motion to turn itself on as it would come on when I put my hand near it … to … turn on … the monitor … that it was … powered by … Ooooohhhhhhhhhh… I’m dumb.

    Anyway. I have a JOB INTERVIEW Friday! It’s still government so it would just be a simple transfer with barely any paperwork. I could get away from my clusterfuck team! I bet I could be more than 2 days a week at home too! I HOPE I GET IT. And that it doesn’t suck if I do get it.

    Tour My Office!

    Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Tour My Office!

    I have an office now! I’m very excited about it. Back when I worked from home at my last job, I bought a desk on Facebook Marketplace. I just shoved it up against the window in the guest room and turned the bed sideways to make it work. It worked but I did not like it. It was nice that Jack slept on the bed behind me though. But I hated the bed looking terrible being sideways and the desk shoved up against the curtains that I had hung and even installed pretty adorable globes in.

    Most people at my current job work from home. You have to come in at least one day a week. If you want to keep your desk, you have to come in three days a week. I haven’t had a ton of work to do, so I haven’t wanted to work from home. But now that I have a steady stream of work, I filed the paperwork. I still want to keep my cube space at work, so I’ll be working Mondays and Tuesday from home. I did last week, but only half days as I had in-person meetings both mornings. So tomorrow is like my first day from home!

    Check out my office:

    This room was always the “game room.” When we moved in, we put those old three shelves in here and all of our games and books. When we got a king sized bed, we put our old bed in here and made mom’s room mom’s room and this room the guest room. Well, we don’t need two guest rooms, so I asked husband if I could make it my office. He said I could! So K&K came over and we moved beds!

    I don’t have to have my desk scrunched against the window now. I added some short shelves and bam! I bought that stuff organizer you see on top of the shelf by the window. I gathered all the miscellaneous electronics and bits all over the house and gave them a home. All the wires, battery backups, chargers, ipods, earbuds, adapters, wireless speakers, camera zoomy things, old tablets, USB drives, chromecast, Sphero — organized. You wanna see something extremely satisfying? Check this out:

    Isn’t it beautiful? I just want to stare at it. Look at that organization. It pleases me greatly. It’s smaller than a book. But holds all my cables. Why do I have 5 short USB type B cables? No idea. I’ve got USB extenders, Audio extenders, USB C wires, plug adapters, various other adapters. A whole junk drawer of wires in perfect alignment. Yes. Praise Jesus. Look, here’s the Amazon link. For $10 it is SEVERELY underselling its usefulness. They’re selling it for travel. No; sell if for junk drawers. Those are your people.

    That shelf also has all my boxes of cards and some miscellaneous bins I got from cleaning out moms rooms. It’s an organization shelf. Giving homes to shit that didn’t have homes before. ORGANIZATION.

    As I said, this has always been the “Game Room.” We call it that because it’s where we hoard our board game collection. With my addition of a few more shelves, I was able to get all the books and other junk off of these shelves (except for my craft bag of junk there on the left). So that gave me room to spread the games out and actually showcase some. Like the out-of-print Formula De that I ordered husband from a chick in England. I like how on the top left, I stood up Cat Lady and Leaving Earth (with a rocket ship). I told husband that’s me and him. Those puzzles on the bottom were mommas. The doors one hasn’t even been done. It was her last Christmas present.

    So these shelves are where it kinda becomes MY office. First, let’s get the inflation comment out of the way. That shelf in the middle? Same shelf from the same store. Cost more than the others but shrunk in depth and height. Yep.

    I had to move all the miscellaneous books over here and I thought it would look like shit. Especially because I also gathered up the sprinkling of books we had all over the house (Husband is a reader). I think I did really good though! And now I have a place for my favorite tchotchkes! I’ve always been a fan of making my work desk homey and comfortable. But now that I have MY OWN OFFICE, I could bring some home. Obviously, most of them stayed at work (Like my voodoo Dammit Doll). But I brought home my favorites that are more valuable that I’d be heart broken if someone stole them. Like the Good Omens Pops you can spy by my monitors in an earlier picture. Here we also have a Star Trek homage with a RARE tribble. That’s right, that red headed bastard was only available as a loot crate exclusive. And my Mini Masters Jayne Cobb figurine! He was a gift. Oh and my goomba on top of the Witcher books. Also this is the only place Grogu (Baby Yoda) has ever made sense. He’s a damn good quality toy. The sculpting is top notch. I just never had a place for him. He looks great here!

    There’s a magnetic dry erase board on the wall with a few notes from momma. Oh and those are battery operated candles. There’s one lit in that blue Moroccan lantern. I have a plan for the wall too. I have my Amazon wish list stocked with some hexagon shelves and some gemstone jars.

    I love me some pretty rocks. This is a cool way to have all the gemstones but affordably and orderly and labeled!

    Don’t those look gorgeous? 49 different gemstone types in adorable little 2 inch apothecary jars with cork tops! Don’t you think they’d look so great lined up in some little white beehive hexagon shelves? I do hope someone will get them for me for my birthday or Christmas. I’m a little worried no one will gift me the GORGEOUS gemstones because they’re advertised and sold as witchcraft supplies. I’m not a witch, I just really like rocks, OK? Also if White Howlite really does tell negative energy to “fuck off” like the lady at the tattoo expo told me, how is that bad?

    On my Arm Lift. And tattoo.

    Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on On my Arm Lift. And tattoo.

    Usually, I write off my brachioplasty (arm lift) results. There’s multiple reasons. I didn’t get liposuction (would have if I knew to ask!) so I still have really big arms. I also still have that obnoxious fat overhang on my elbow. So I’m usually frustrated with it. Like I went through ALL THAT and still have huge arms. Really? This shit was so expensive too!

    Also, when you compare my other surgeries, those are just far more impressive. I had a stomach pouch for years even after I lost weight so tummy tuck — huge. And boobs — they make every single outfit look better. Combine those two, and there’s so much oomph! This is the only time in my whole life where my breasts have stuck out further than my stomach. Seriously. I’m pretty sure I was fat before I grew breasts, so yeah. I mean the abdomen is just a complete overhaul. The difference is amazing. So yeah, I’m usually not too jazzed about the arms in comparison. Also huge scars. I’m not terribly bothered by the scars but I am disappointed that they looked like they would be so perfect and neat right after surgery but have since expanded.

    HOWEVER (yes, in all caps), if you look at old photos, the arms do look hella better. They’re not all floppy either. There was a good bit of skin removed there. Before this, I’d never have worn a tank top to work. I’d CERTAINLY never have considered a tattoo sleeve. Fat flabby arms can’t have tattoo sleeves. Now that I have tighter arms and working on a fucking fabulous tattoo sleeve, I’m all about some tank tops.

    Whenever an ad for a sale at Lane Bryant or Torrid pops up, I’m like “do they have any work-appropriate tanks tops?” I have a smallish collection of work tank tops hanging in my closet now. They’re my favorite to wear. I gotta show of my sweet tat.

    I know it’s a work in progress. I can’t wait till we do the shoulder! But it’s nice and substantial and damn cool already. Hopefully, it greatly detracts from my balding head and acne/hairy/PCOS chin. No seriously, I’m having big issues about feeling ugly so let’s all look at the boobs and tattoo. Oooooooo.

    I’m so so so glad it has my Jack in it. I miss him so much. I rub between his eyes and tell him I miss him. (He liked having me scratch right between his eyes sometimes). So I do frequently look at it and touch his little face. And people love it.

    Almost everywhere I go, someone comments on it. Seriously. Just about everywhere. “Love your tattoo!” “Gorgeous tattoo!” “Who did your tattoo?” “Is that a cat!?” “Where’d you get it done?” “That work is amazing.” “Holy shit! I love it!” It’s a hype piece. A conversation starter for sure. I love it! Nearly everywhere I go, it’s mentioned.

    (And yeah, hopefully it’s drawing attention away from my face. Look at my cleavage or something.)

    Commercial Break?

    Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Commercial Break?

    Sorry for lack of posting. I’ve been in a funk. I moved offices at work and I’m supposed to be doing a fuck ton of training before I can take over this other job. A job, I don’t want mind you. And the person leaving that job is leaving in two weeks. So I have two weeks to do a weeks worth of training and then be taught how to do this insanely important job. Oh and this one person who has been doing it is one of those crazy work-aholics that won’t let ANY BALLS drop — she admits just this single part of her job is more than a full time job. She’s been saying it for months and SURPRISE — now she’s leaving. Yall burnt her out.

    So I had a frank discussion with my boss boss. I can do this. But if I do this, I can’t do the rest of my job. Not an option. I have to be at least 51% on my own job. Well, then this job isn’t gonna get done. Her response? Other people are gonna have to step up. And that’s all fine and good to say… but no they’re not. They’ve worked here for 15 years and no one knows what they actually do. Like they just get paid. That’s all they do. She says she’ll take care of it. But he hasn’t returned her calls all of last week. Uhuh…

    And I’m not even close to be done with this training. UGH. I didn’t sign up for this shit.