Happy Halloween!

Today was Halloween, also known as my favorite holiday. All the fun of the other holidays, none of the stress! No obligations! Just the good stuff you choose to do.

Obviously, I’ve had much preparation. All of my downstairs is covered in decorations. K2 and I did our gingerbread houses a bit ago. I did Wednesday Season 2, as you know.

Sunday K and K2 came over to carve pumpkins. I did a scary face. Well, Sunday he was scary. Like a bright new evil minion ready for mayhem. Today, he’s more of an older over-indulged boss type that tells the other fresh minions what to do. Hey, a week in jack-o-lantern time is like 30 years in human time. Now he’s more of a corporate evil.

Speaking of corporate evil, today was the end of my second week on the new job. So far I really like my coworkers. The people I work with have very sparse cubes, so I’m pretty sure they think I’m crazy because I moved on in. THEN I decorated for Halloween.

The other night I made up a bunch of goody bags to give out at work. So, I’m obviously repping Halloween today. I was in the break room refilling my water and this guy goes “You have bats on your neck!” I say “yep” without looking up from my water bottle. And then he goes “…wait… are those real?” “Yep.”

Hahaha. I’ve never had anyone comment on the bats much less think they were fake tattoos. But I am new and I was very clearly repping Halloween. So I guess you would assume I’d do fake tattoos. I mean, I would. These just aren’t. I did find it hilarious though.

After work I ran by Panera for husband’s dinner and mom’s blueberry streusel muffin. Yes, I know she liked the APPLE streusel muffin, but they don’t make those anymore. Then I used the last bit of daylight to harvest flowers for my ofrenda while Louie smelled all the things.

Tonight, husband and I played the third episode of Dispatch and I made cake for me and Jack. I put together a gorgeous ofrenda for mom and Jack! Tomorrow is Día de los Muertos, after all.

I grew all the flowers. The orange Mexican Marigold were seeded this year just for this purpose. Not as many grew as I’d have hoped. Next year I’ll do more varieties. All the yellow are actually ones that grew from what I planted last year that seeded itself. They all smell heavenly. I can see why this is the flower for Día de los Muertos. Mom would be pleased with this display.

Mom has her Panera muffin, pumpkin spice coffee (also smells heavenly), and those little candy pumpkins. She loved those. I also made Jack and I cake tonight. Jack fucking LOVED cake icing. So I made us a yellow keto cake with the keto cream cheese icing he could never get enough of. That cat fucking loved sweets. I garnished it with some catnip that Louie doesn’t give a fuck about. I have a ton of plants now because Louie doesn’t bother them. Jack ate ALL THE PLANTS. So he’ll appreciate fresh catnip. Mom will probably give him some muffin too.

Still no Trick-Or-Treaters… ever… at this house.

Bed time for me. I hope Jack visits. I hope he at least knows how much I miss him. Mom’s a human, but Jack’s just a cat. So I hope he knows I’d be with him if I could. Take care of him for me, mom!

Progress on Crafts, Decor, and Job Hunting!

Making progress on my epic Halloween diamond painting.  Five of the 8 panels are complete! 

I’m taking a short break to swap to my small diamond painting for Drills and Chills.  It’s a Halloween event where you can win prizes!  This painting wouldn’t count because you couldn’t start until September.  So I’m doing this small one from Michael’s:

You might think I’ll never finish both before Halloween, but I have some time off coming up.  Possibly.  Very likely. 

I might have found a job!  It will be as a contract to the government.  I’ll be doing hardware configuration management in aviation.  It’s working for a temporary boss I had. 

The benefits aren’t as good, but they’re better than unemployment!  And I love my boss.  She won’t be my boss boss cause I’ll be a contractor again.  But my boss only cares that I make her happy, so SCORE. 

Problem is less PTO and not fronting me ANY.  So starting late October with 0 PTO.  Awesome. 

HOWEVER, it is just in time for me to leave my job with a payout incentive to quit.  Right in the nick of time!  I have to choose by Tuesday.  They wanted to try to get me the offer Friday, but it didn’t come so hopefully tomorrow. 

I’m going to take 2 weeks off.  STAYCATION!

I Cannot Stand for this Heathenism!

This week, my dumbass job decided that sending me to offsite Agile (the work process) training (which I’ve had three times already) was more valuable than me doing work. It sucked cause I had to get up an hour earlier than usual all week. Then I saw this on Thursday:

You done fucked up A-aron!

NOT. COOL. This is wrong on so so many levels.

  • First and foremost, one of the rolls is backwards.
  • Second, there is no consistency here. They are not facing the same way. This is the kind of quality of work you do? Be wrong or right, but be consistent.
  • Third, the roll placed the correct way will run out first. Because, see, people use that roll more. Because it’s the right way to put the toilet paper. So people who know the correct way it is supposed to be installed (hung? placed?) will be punished and forced to use the cursed roll.

Whats that? “Both ways are correct.” YOU FOOL. Toilet paper comes OVER the top of the roll. And do you want to know how I am 100% positive of my correctness? Because there’s a goddamn patent for toilet paper rolls. Observe:

That man drew toilet paper 6 times and not once did he draw it the wrong way.

Eight Day Migraine

Family Catch-up

Yall know I’ve been stressed. I haven’t been posting a ton, but you remember the family drama, right? My (low contact) dad died and my sisters be crazy and I got tossed back into the turmoil I needed therapy to escape.

Actually, I just looked it up to backlink and I haven’t posted about it since the day he died. That’s how you know its stressful. You stop trying your stress relief and asking for help because it’s just fucked.

Hmm. Wow. How do we update this without a thesis? Dad died, obviously. I don’t get bereavement leave and took unpaid time to be there when he died. So lame. It’s not relevant, but I’m bitter.

So, my sister, the caretaker is kinda of taking charge of everything. Cause My father had a will that left the house to her but he never signed it because OF COURSE. And while he was with his GF for 16 years, they weren’t married and she had her own house closer to her work so they can’t establish common law marriage. So that leaves us with having to get an attorney to settle the estate and all 5 children have to agree to everything and/or get an equal cut.

So caretaker sister was doing that. She had already been doing a bunch of it and keeping everyone totally up to date. Then she went to pick up the death certificates and someone already had. Turns out secret family step brother had picked them up. He claimed it was to be helpful. But really he was getting his own attorney to get power of the estate — which doesn’t matter because the law would still be the same, but some people are stupid. Well, I actually saved the day by telling them that she could just go print a new one for $15 and she did so she beat him to it. But I still got yelled at a ton.

Why? Cause evil secret family step brother is trying to thwart everyone on every single fucking thing. First it was the death certificates. Then he filmed everything in the house to document it so nothing would be lost. Then fighing over what real estate agent to use. Refusing to let movers be paid for by the estate (my solution to “im not helping”) or help himself. And all through all of this shit he lying his teeth off about how he’s doing it to protect caregiver sister. Whatever.

Oh wait — so antifreeze sister and secret family step brother think there is money to be had. Cause dad lived like he had money. And they’re stupid. Dad owed years of back taxes and had a reverse mortgage. So no. I was on team — just let them reposes everything. But my siblings wanted to sell the house because even with the reverse mortgage there was/is money to be made. So I was like sure, I vote to sell too. So then they had to fix shit and pack up the house and move the packed up shit (cause dad was kind of a hoarder about buying ALL THE SHIT). And I got a fuck ton of flack for not being there helping. EVEN FROM MY SISTER IN LAW.

Yall, I wanted to let it get repossessed. I don’t want any of his shit. I’m not the one stealing death certificates and getting my own attorney. Yet I’m getting yelled at over text way too much. And secret family step brother is a total piece of shit. His attorney sent a letter of his demands which was everything with VIN plus everything of any value — plus dads retirement axe and medals. Like everything. Which I find especially scummy because he demanded the only two things the girl friend of 16 year wanted. Fucking piece of shit. I get that both of his parents had personality disorders so he surely does as well — but he has a wife. How is she justifying her husband acting like this? Someone dies and you just run in and try to take it all? I’m told they DID actually try to get the house too. They wanted to take out a reverse mortgage of their own to pay off dads reverse mortgage and they get the house. Yeah… the law don’t work like that.

So we’re selling dads house and vehicles and, now everything. And now that secret family step brother is fighting us in court, we’re going to have to sell EVERYTHING. Yeah, like even the personal shit. If you want it, you gotta buy it from the estate. Which, I don’t want any of it – but that’s harsh, man. Also, all the money we’re spending to fight his attorney will come out of the estate at the end. He’s gonna get 1/5th of the money no matter what — that’s the law. So why is he making it so difficult? Also, he still has one of the vehicles (illegally) and won’t give caretaker sister the millage to estimate it’s value for sell. Last I heard (over a week ago), she was going to have the attorney demand it be returned or report it missing if he doesn’t. Cause… you can’t have a car that’s not yours. Like what are you even thinking? It’s not in your name. How would you even renew the tags? What is happening?

And yes, I DO have all of these text messages muted. But I still see them. And it’s very stressful. And I’m tried of getting shat on by my family. Also, YALL ARE INSANE. This is a fucking soap opera. The step brother from dads secret family is suing us for everything after his death That’s a bad tv plot.

Work Catch-up

I haven’t posted at all about work. Because it’s a cluster fuck. I don’t know if you follow the news, but the US is kinda going up in flames at the moment. I’m a federal employee. So yadda yadda yadda, we gotta get rid of 2000 people. DRP, DRP2, VERA/VSIP — only half there, guys! So they cut all the probationary people. Not enough. Until recently, I didn’t have to worry too much, cause I’m a term. Meaning I was hired for a term. For the past few years, my company has only been letting people hire on as terms and not “perms” (permanent employees). They just extend the terms forever. So until recently, it didn’t affect me. They had to cut perms. My job wouldn’t affect anything. Well, then they decided that you could only have 10% overage as well — overage is the term employees. We have way too many. So until we get down to our goal staff, we can’t renew terms. My term is up January 17, 2026.

Well, they really need some of us. (LISTEN — there is government fat that needs cutting. You know who it is? The lifers that don’t do work and you can’t fire them. But this isn’t touching those people). So they were extending some terms to get us out of the cut window. But then FRAGO23 hit and they wouldn’t let them extend terms anymore. So I get called into a meeting with 3 up my chain of command to inform me my extension had not been processed yet. FUCK. They extended me and then reneged it!

So now I gotta find a job. Husband got laid off in April and so is in his gap year. SO I HAVE OUR HEALTH INSURANCE. We have savings and no debt so we are so awesome. Like everyone else is fucked and we are crazy blessed. But, I still need insurance. We can’t not have insurance. So I gotta find a job. With insurance. Now. And it’s more stressful job hunting when it’s just you with the insurance. I can’t go on husbands insurance — HES ON MINE.

So I’m job hunting! I’ve been to a symposium, a hiring event, and today I had an interview. Fun. Fun times. Not like everyone else isn’t looking for a job too. I fucking hate new jobs.

Migraine

So suffice to say, I’m fucking stressed to hell. I had my regular followup with my neurologist last month and they were like “how are your headaches?” And I was like really fucking bad. Cause anxiety and stress makes migraines worse. I know this. So I’m like — I’m stressed to fuck and my neck is jank. But they were like — well… we’re gonna do an MRI and more physical therapy for your neck anyway. Awesome.

Then last Monday, I started getting a bad headache. Mostly sound sensitive. PT on Tuesday and it started to become light sensitive. Wednesday we had a meeting with my new division at work.

— Wait — more background — were doing a whole new reorg and it is a CLUSTERFUCK. Like I am on the Titanic. So really, I think God is just forcing me out of this shitty job that he knew I wouldn’t leave due to inertia. —

New division is such an epic clusterfuck that you just can’t even say anything. You just have to go — yep. Ok. You wanna die, fine — lets go play music while the ship sinks. Great plan, AMERICA. So combine that with the Migraine and I left early.

Tuesday I had tried one rescue med. Wednesday I decided to try another. I can’t drive on that one so It meant taking Thursday off too. Yeah, neither worked. So Thursday, I call the neurologist twice. Then again once on Friday. And Friday at close, I get a call that they’re calling in a different rescue med.

Well, insurance doesn’t cover it. And their office is closed now for the weekend. The no cost help-pay option only works if insurance covers part of it — then the drug company pays the rest. So that’s no help. GoodRx price was $1,200. FOR HOW MANY? 10 pills. Can I get less? Hold. We can do 3 pills for $400. How much is a fucking dose? 1 pill. How much is one pill? $140. Fucking fill it.

Two days missed work, three rescue meds — one of which cost $140 — didn’t fix the migraine. So Monday I’m at work and my stomach is just going “im gonna barf im gonna barf im gonna barf.” I can wok through pain, but working through “im gonna barf” is significantly more difficult. So I call the neurologist again — I’ve missed 2 days of work and spent over $150 and you haven’t fixed it. And they’re like — yo you gotta go to the hospital or urgent care then. Wait WHAT? What the fuck can urgent care do?

So I call Urgent Care. They can give me two shots. Then if that doesn’t work, the next day, they can hook me up to some IVs. Holy shit, why didn’t anyone tell me this last week? I’m on my way.

So I go and they’re like rate your pain. I fucking hate rating my pain. I have a high pain tolerance and I really think that a 10 should be “I’ve cut my hand off but I can still talk and answer this question.” So I learned that you don’t give them a number, you tell them how it is affecting your life. So I was like driving makes me want to cry, I feel like I ate ecoli tainted mexican food, I’ve missed 2 days of work, and I paid $150 for a PILL. ONE PILL. Do you know how much ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY DOLLARS IS? And now I’m here even though this means I have to work late to make it up. “So 8 then?” Sure. Oh and, obviously, my head feels like it’s in a vice grip, but we discussed that’s easier to sit through than the barf thing.

So they gave me a shot in each side of my ass on Monday.

It’s Wednesday and I think we’re finally over the hump. I did think it was totally gone but I do admit that typing this, I have a bit of a headache.

It’s stress. Stress is going to kill me.

Confession Time

I just watched a YouTube video about high sugar drinks we had as kids.  It brought back a sin from the past. 

I have a confession to make. 

Some time between 2007 and 2010 I was working really late and saw one of these babies in the work fridge:

Hug Fruit Barrels

A red Fruit Barrel.  I stole it and drank it right there.  I actually still feel bad about it.  It wasn’t even as good as I had remembered, but it might have just been tainted by sin. 

That’s the only time I ever took something from the office fridge.  Also one of only two times I can even think that I stole something and felt bad about it.  Well, wait, I did take a traffic cone in college but I actually DID feel bad about it and “gave it back.”

The other time I was like super young.  Like kindergarten-ageish.  Mom found me playing with a little plastic furskin figurine.  It was probably from a McDonald’s type meal.  She asked me where I got it and I “got it” at daycare.  She told me that was STEALING.  I still feel bad about that one too.

Also, holy SHIT!  FURSKIN! I’ve thought about my little furskin with his list boot for like 4 decades and couldn’t ever remember what they were called!  This guy:

Furskin

I got him for Christmas and very promptly lost his boot.  I was distraught while we looked at Christmas lights! I LOST HIS BOOT!

Lot of trauma with me and Furskins, apparently.  Also, I’m laughing that it came from Wendy’s.  Cause we also had the little Rhonda and Randy Reindeer from Wendy’s.  Did Wendy’s just have amazing toys in the 80s?

Also furskin is literally fur+skin which is weird.  And that boot wasn’t held on with anything.  Just a freaking plastic tube on his leg.  You can’t expect my 4 year old self to not lose that.  God, I was so upset about that boot. 

I thought you didn’t form memories until you were 5?  If that guy was really from 1986, that would make me 4.  I was in the back passenger side of the car while we looked at Christmas lights and I realized he was missing a boot and was crying.  BECAUSE HE LOST HIS BOOT! 

Smartassing for Amusement. 

One thing I do far to much at work is to smart ass for amusement.  Not just this job.  Every job.  If you send out a tone-deaf email, my fingers just take over and start typing. 

Today we got a safety email about strong scents in the workplace.  Basically strong cleaners, perfumes, air fresheners, soaps, lotions – all that – can be harmful to people who are really sensitive.  We need to be mindful of our coworkers. 

Background: they have been putting a new coating of tar on our roof for months.  It was supposed to be two weeks back at the beginning April.  Don’t ask me.  But the smell is acrid.  It’s causing lots of people headaches and makes my eyes burn. 

There are multiple signs posted all over that you may notice a strong smell but it is nontoxic.  No one believes that bullshit.  But at least I sit on the first floor so it’s far better than the poor fuckers upstairs.  Also, I could move to a hot desk in another building but whatever.

So I get this email about strong lotion and my fingers just take over “You are aware…”

I do this because the responses always amuse me.  I’m a pot-stirrer.  I never claimed I was anything better. 

Anyway, they just replied that the materials used are “known to give off certain fumes or odors during the application process. […] Please rest assured that the materials chosen have been evaluated by <BLAH BLAH Industrial Hygiene Team>, are compliant with safety standards, and precautions were taken to minimize any impact on employee air quality.”

Uhuh.  Sure, DuPont. 

Manspreading the Whole Room

I just had a man enter my office (which contains three cubicles) and manspread the whole ass room.  I have never seen this.  I instantly hated this person. 

There are people who command with their presence in a quiet way.  This was not that.  This was not a natural, respectable, commanding (think Reacher from the TV show with Alan Ritchson, not the movie.  Or anything with Henry Caville or Alan Ritchson where they just stand there quietly but respectfully).  This was an extremely annoying “I’m important” imposition. 

He walked in, went to the center of the room, spread his feet apart, puffed out his chest, crossed his arms over his puffed out chest, and very loudly and firmly (in a quiet office sitting) said “officemate, I need your attention.” I said (disrespectfully) “she’s in a meeting.” Cause she was literally hosting a TEAMS meeting with her headphones on.  I’ve been listening to it for an hour and a half.  I fucking hate return to office. 

So she asks her meeting to give her a second and she informed him she’s in a meeting and asks who he is.  He says he’s with <<Insert bane-of-my-existence dumpsterfire here>>.  They need to talk to her.  He clarifies it’s nothing bad.  She clarifies she’s in a fucking meeting. 

So he told her to come to his office when she’s done, explains where it is, his name – way too much time taken from someone hosting a meeting.  He should have just said, I’ll send you a message or an email, but no. 

What an asshole.  I’ve never seen someone just come in and demand to be seen and heard like that.  Just fucking manspreading over the whole room.  Fuck off. 

And I know he isn’t high ranking military as they wear uniforms.  Even our directors aren’t such assholes.   

UPDATE: Oh it’s a head hunt.  Blood shall be spilled over this new dumpsterfire flare up.   

This Day is Sus as Fuck

I’m having a wonderful morning.  And I am suspicious.  I never have a good morning.  Am I going to die?

My husband is happy and woke up before me.  Hopped out of bed and went for a walk before my zombie ass even got out of bed.  He hung out with me while I got ready for work.  It was really nice.

Had nice clothes clean and not wrinkly to wear.  Husband complimented that I looked good. 

I brushed the cat.  Headed to work in a good mood while husband started unloading the dishwasher.  No traffic.  I usually hit the red light and have to wait three light cycles to get to the gate.  There was no one.  I pulled up to the white line.  I literally check my clock, because am I late?

No line at the gate.  All gates open and no one in front of me.  Am I sure I’m on time?  The clock says I am. 

Saw a crow, said hello.  Got a good parking space, WTF?

On time to settle in before joining my early daily stand up. 

WHAT IS HAPPENING?

Like I’m seriously just suspicious.  If I die: I love you, husband.  Take care of Louie.  JACK BETTER BE THERE. 

*Break*

So I couldn’t post this from my phone because WordPress is having issues.  I figured I’d post when I get home. 

Walmart just called me.  (I had actually emailed them with photos and the order number plus a link to my post).  They offered to replace everything in that order PLUS refund it.  But I’m not a shitty human.  I already got a refund for the popcorn and everything else was still sealed so I’m gonna use it.  Like I’d feel really bad if I accepted that.  I’m neutral chaotic, not greedy.  

SO THEY GAVE ME A HUNDRED DOLLAR GIFT CARD. 

What is happening?  This is not my life.  If that 3:00 all hands actually ends on time (4:00) when it always runs to almost 5, I’m going to call my husband and tell him I want a natural burial.

Natural burial in comfortable clothes.  Like just wrap me in some linen or whatever in comfortable clothes (But ones I look good in.  I don’t wanna be a slob.  I like the outfit I’m wearing today.) Also, I want to actually be dressed, not just look dressed.  No shoes, no makeup.  Don’t forget Jack’s ashes!

I don’t care where it is, but I want it to be a forest near a tree that turns pretty colors in the Fall.  If we can spring for it, creepy ass angel statue coving her face cause she crying ala the weeping angels. Or just creepy ass angel in the woods. 

I don’t care if there’s a funeral or not.  Seriously, I don’t care.  If you wanna hold one, you do you.  I’d like for you to be at my burial.  That’s all, no family.  My besties can come if you need support. 

You get all our stuff and my money.  Give my nephews a bit of cash. 

Also a bit to M, K, and K2.  They’re my peeps and made my life better.  If you’re not gonna appreciate Gregory and my bird bath, make sure one of them gets it. 

Thank you for a great day. 

Middle-Aged Show ‘N Tell

When you find a nice thing and you have to show it to everyone because we stopped having show ‘n tell after kindergarten. Which, BTW, we need to bring back. You know how we have fucking bullshit Lunch ‘n Learn topics every Thursday? And fucking Wellness Wednesday lunches? Well I want a TEAMS call show ‘n tell! I wanna eat my lunch and watch my coworkers show me fancy things. Or their pets. Or their favorite new pen. Whatever they want. I’d tune into that every god damn week AND participate. So here is my latest Amazon review:

This review is for the PU Leather Tissue Box Holder with Magnetic Closure in Silver Grey.  Or as Amazon calls it, the “PU Leather Tissue Box Cover Square Tissue Box Holder with Magnetic Closure, Decorative Tissue Holder for Bathroom Bedroom Office (Silver Grey).” And let me tell you, the PU Leather Tissue Box Holder with Magnetic Closure in Silver Grey has absolutely no right to be this awesome.  It’s a tissue box, yall, not a jewelry box.  I’ve had jewelry boxes that weren’t nearly this nice. 

This box is so fantastic, that I’m skipping right over the fact that normal tissue boxes are ugly and obnoxious.  Do I need a rainforest print in my living room?  No.  Do you sell solid colors?  Also, no.  We’re skipping that. 

What is this box even made of?  I can’t bend it.  And it is actually rather weighty.  My cat can’t even knock this off the table – and he’s gonna try.  There’s a magnetic closure on the bottom (some tissue box covers don’t even HAVE bottoms) and when it closes, there is a very satisfying thunk sound.  And yall, it’s LINED.  Not just with paper – it’s lined with the velour type felt that jewelry boxes are lined with. 

I say again to you, good sir, why is this box so nice? 

I tried to take some close-up pictures to show you the craftsmanship.  Look at those straight lines and seams.  Look at that lining.  Look how perfectly square the lining is cut and applied to in the inside of the bottom of the tissue box cover that no one will ever see.  Look at the hole!  The PU leather isn’t just cut out at the hole, it’s finished and sewn.  Oh and whatever non-trivial material this thing is made of has been covered in another layer of matching PU leather very well folded over and then sealed with the way-too-nice liner.  I’m actually holding this in my hands flipping it around wondering how they got this perfect curve so nicely covered without a seam going down the hole – wait!  I picked it up again, after typing that, to examine this sorcery again – there is a seam, it’s just nearly invisible.  I only noticed it by feel.  Thank you, because I’m a crafter and I was confused by that impossibility.

The only downside it that the “silver grey” is metallic.  I’m putting this in my living room so I’d have preferred a matte finish.  However, if it weren’t so dang nice, I could just put it in the bathroom and it’d look great in there. 

I’m going to start showing guests the tissue box, aren’t I?  Being old is so weird. 

I see that they make a version of this that’s got a compartment for remotes.  I’m not gonna act like I don’t want that for my desk at work.  And another for my night stand. And one for the guest room. FIVE STARS.    

five stars

//END OF REVIEW

Yall. Blog reader yall, that is. Just to compare. I want you to see see the god awful piece of trash I reviewed last week:

I only gave it two or three stars but I really wanna go back and make it like 1 star now.