New friend?

“A bobcat lounges on a dog bed in San Manuel home Mon. The homeowner, who found it upon returning from work, suspects it entered through an unlocked doggie door.”

Listen, I’d like to pretend that I would not approach this bobcat and would immediately go upstairs and call someone. But lets be realistic here. I’m gonna try to make friends with it. I’d be sneaking to the kitchen and throwing it raw chicken. Trying to make it my new cat. I’d be taking pictures. Hopefully, it would growl at me before it ripped my face off. THEN I’d do the right thing before it got worse. But … yeah, part of me would have hope I could befriend it.

I guess it’s a good thing I don’t have a dog door. It’s not just the bobcat either. Man give me a freaking raccoon with with creepy little fingers. I’ll hand it treats it can hold onto with his little hands. Or a FOX! Hell, yeah I want a pet fox. It’s not like I went out and caught it — it came to ME. It wants to live here.

Your pet is not your “baby”

OK yall, we gotta stop with this calling your pet your baby shit. I know im gonna get a ton of flack for this because literally everyone I know calls their pets their babies. Hey, my dad calls his dog my sister. He likes the dog better though, and thats why he’s a bastard.

I know, your pet is your family. You might even, like my father, openly admit you like the pet better than your children. It happens. I don’t want a kid. Have yall met my precious J? He’s my soul creature, my witchy familiar, maybe even my soul mate, but he’s not my baby. He’s a piece of me and will ALWAYS be a piece of me. He’s a splinter of my soul in cat form. I get it.

But I just got a paragraph into a Facebook post about a friend of a friends baby dying and was terribly upset for everyone involved, only to realize, like two paragraphs in, that it was a dog. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE. I thought you were mourning a human child who had been in an auto accident that another human driver was going to have on his conscious for the rest of his life. I repeat: THERE IS A DIFFERENCE.