Category: Curiosities

On this day, three years ago…

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The below Facebook post was in my memories for today. 2020 was a dark time, y’all. And this was BEFORE mom died. Fuck.

What’s funny is, I still remember being robbed in Animal Crossing, cause that cut deep. That was a place of happy innocent retreat for everyone. So getting robbed on fucking Animal Crossing of ALL THINGS. For fucks sake. How low can people be? You gonna rob people on a kids game when they’re giving you free shit. I’m still bitter about it. This is why I hate people, yall. People are bad.

But I actually forgot about the jaw thing. After the car wreck that wrecked my brain, my jaw would sometimes make a piercingly loud noise when I opened my mouth wide. It bothered husband. I think just because it was so jarring. At some point though, it appears to have stopped!

We never “fixed” the jaw issue, for the record. The physical therapist determined that it wasn’t anything harmful, just annoying. Probably cartilage built up funny when I hurt it in the accident. He said it might wear down and stop. Looks like he was right. Can’t remember the last time it made that noise. (*Que me opening my mouth wide while I type*) Neisen Physical Therapy was awesome. Wish I could afford to go get dry needling and neck work done on the regular. My neck has regressed a lot since therapy.

~~~ START: FACEBOOK POST – AUGUST 05, 2020 ~~~

I’m crying because I got robbed in animal Crossing. I let people in to have my saved up DIY recipes. For free. Someone took all my fossils and harvested the money trees I had around my town square. And yes, everyone agrees it’s my fault. But I didn’t expect to get fleeced in a fucking ANIMAL CROSSING GAME when I was being generous. And I have duplicates of almost all the fossils anyway, had they asked, I’d have given them full dinosaurs.

OK, so I didn’t cry over Animal Crossing. Not really. It’s literally the straw that broke the camels back. The tiniest most insignificant thing that just broke the levy.

There’s just too much going on. I’ve got an interview tomorrow which is awesome, right? But The last phone interview I didn’t get. It’s like the first interview I’ve done where I didn’t get a job offer. Seriously. So I’m like WTF? Did I lose my interview mojo? I’m freaking out now.

But I feel good about the job prospect but it opens a flood gate of other things: 1) back to work. I’ve been out of work since October and to go back to working 9 hour days and waking up early and being tired all the time and not having time to take care of things again? Ugh. And how will it affect my head aches? We don’t know.

Speaking of headaches, now when I can’t figure something out, I don’t know if it’s brain damage or normal. Seriously. I have to ask Husband sometimes. Like why can’t I grasp this? Is this normal?

And the ENT thinks I could benefit from more physical therapy. I’m fine with that, I thought physical therapy was working great on my neck and we finally literally THAT last appointment identified the jaw issue from the wreck. The one that causes my jaw to make obnoxiously loud noises every once and a while that bug Husband. LOL. But he decided my progress was too slow and fucking gave up on me. Can’t trust any body.

Not your lawyer either. Shitty ass lawyer. Now we’re in a lawsuit just to try to recover my lost wages — not even damages or anything. And not even the fact that i lost my job. We’re only asking for what I was due till May when the doctor said I should try work part time.

And never trust a fucking company. I’ve told so many people that and then I fell in love with Boecore. And I trusted them. And I love working for my friend, F. And they were awesome for a few months. They told me ‘oh we’ll keep you on as long as you’re making progress” — then all the sudden with NO WARNING, I get a “we’re laying you off next week” phone call. What the fuck was that? You couldn’t have told me a month ago? Some warning would be nice.

But at Least I have Husband’s insurance to fall back on. But then now there’s a deductible that has to be met. Which is why I can’t afford to go back to physical therapy. I need to go to the gastroenterologist too but I can’t afford that either. I can’t afford shit. I was upset and lonely the other day missing my fair-weather friends and Mexican food when Husband suggested Chuy’s take out But we really shouldn’t because it’s cheaper to cook.

We’ve been set back huge financially. And we thought we’d get my missed wages back, but we won’t. We were deceived. Now we’re set back on our plan of where we expected to be right now. And I know, Husband assures me we’re treading water and won’t lose the house — but we lost HALF OUR INCOME. We can’t go on forever like this. And this is my house Mine. Mine mine mine mine. I’d see it bulldozed before I thought of someone else living in it. I can’t fathom it! I was here every day it was being built. I designed it. I picked literally every single color and finish and tile in here. I sat in my bedroom and watched the sunset before there was even sheet rock.

My psychiatrist says this is all temporary. And logically I kinda know it is. BUT WHAT IF IT’S NOT? How long will it go on? How long can it go on? I miss people. I miss eating out. I miss having money.

And anyone who dares to think I didn’t earn my pay and this house can come say it straight to my fucking face because I will gladly let off some steam. I went to school for 9 years to get that damn degree. All the while being mocked for being “forever a student” even jokingly by my own family. I’ve built my career for near 15 years. I earned that pay check. Every penny.

Why can’t you trust anyone? Lawyers, employers, insurers, the general public that won’t take vaccines or wear face masks. Why can’t people just be good?

Who steals shit in ANIMAL CROSSING FOR FUCKS SAKE? Are you serious with me?

Well praise Jesus for a napping husband to sob on. He’s sweet and loving and not something I remotely earned. And Jack. I’ll go hug Jack.

~~~ END: FACEBOOK POST – AUGUST 05, 2020 ~~~

Reuse and Recycle

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So I’ve been taking excellent care of my tattoo. Only the best lotions and sunscreens. Long sleeves if I’m swimming. Excellent care.

So it occurred to me, I could actually take care of my face too. Right now, in mid summer, my face doesn’t look terrible. That’s because it seems swimming in the pool helps my complexion. Usually though, I have zits and tons of ingrown hairs. PCOS gives me chin and lip and sideburn hair that has to be shaved daily. Every day. So when there’s a zit or something, there’s never time for it to heal. It’s getting shaved over every single day. I don’t wear makeup daily so this makes me very self conscious.

I’ve also got a secret, I don’t use lotion. Yep (or nope?) I never developed a skin care regimen. I don’t even know where to start. But like, I decided I should try it on my face. So I went through all the subscription box stuff I just tossed in drawers over the years and googled easy facial routines. Now I’m doing a routine. Evening: Wash, Toner, Serum, Lotion. Morning: Wash, Lotion with sunscreen. I’m so fancy! So apparently you need cotton rounds to apply toner. So I bought some. But like, these are ugly. How shall I store this?

Oh yeah. That’s right. I’ve been married over a decade, and I finally have a good use for my old leather condom box. Magnificent. I’m so chuffed with my condom box.

Anyway, I’m making an effort here. Does anyone have any advice for sunscreen lotion? I bought some for $18 and it burns my eyes just like every god damn sunscreen I’ve ever put on my face. The only sunscreen I can use on my face is Sun Bum stick. It’s so solid that it doesn’t move or sweat. It’s on ’til you wipe that shit off. Everything else eventually ends up in my eye corners and burns! Help!

Give it to me.

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I went to the Tattoo Expo with K and her boyfriend. I’ve never been to a tattoo expo. We saw some work by legit amazing artists. Then there was one guy who wanted us to get these tiny flash for $200. Are you kidding me? You want to do 10 minutes of line work for $200? NO.

So today ran from 2:00 – midnight. So I figured it would be better in the evening. So we met up at 6:30. And guess what? We missed the good stuff! WHAT THE FUCK? I’m legit going to complain to the organizers. We couldn’t find a schedule for this show anywhere. Big fancy website, no schedules. I even went the the circus people’s website (sword swallowers and stuff) to see if they had a schedule. Nope. Walk in and the first thing they give me is a lovely laminated schedule hour by hour for the whole weekend. Oh look, we missed the circus by an hour! DAMMIT. I’m legit pissed about this schedule thing.

Anyway, none of us were really shopping for tattoos. There were 200 tattooists there from all over. And they do tattoos right there. But I’ve got plenty of work to do on mine as it is. But I tell ya, I did see a lot of flash I liked.

There was a booth of a lady selling crystals — like carved crystals and jewelry and stuff. So K and I were looking at the necklaces. I asked her what was good for anxiety and she hands me a white one. Like the most boring of the stones. But she says it’s good for anxiety and getting rid of negative energy. She said it basically says fuck off to bad energy. Oooo. Give me. The card said it was good for sleep too. White Howlite.

According to some random internet search: “It can help reduce your levels of stress and anger, and dispel anger that is directed towards you from others. Howlite works by absorbing negative energy and filling the void with calming properties that help you feel at peace.”

Yeah, fuck the colors. Give me that.

At least it matches everything.

That’s some fucked up shit.

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I’m scrolling Facebook and see this Ulta ad:

A vibrator necklace and a Disney bag. Choose a lane, Ulta! Also is that really a vibrator necklace? How small are the batteries? Surely not. I gotta click that shit.

“The iconic necklace that brought together pleasure and self-expression. Crave’s Vesper is designed to enable beautiful experiences in public and in private, both as a statement jewelry and a strong slim external vibrator.”

Benefits

  • Vesper represents beauty, pleasure, and self-expression. As a stainless steel necklace, it enables the wearer to toe the line between subtle and provocative, to create conversations and to openly express their desires
  • With a removable chain, the Vesper easily turns into a slim external clitoral vibe with a rumbly feel and a smooth rounded tip for pinpoint sensation. Not for internal use

That’s some fucked up shit, yall. Don’t be wearing your vibrators out in public. That’s gross. What is wrong with you people? EW.

Sunscreen Ad?

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So today, I read a post my my bestie M on Facebook that got me off my ass. He posted about suffering from ADHD. Particularly “Executive Dysfunction.” Which, I know nothing about. So I can only say what he conveyed about it. He said he would go for days without eating actual food because he couldn’t make his body go to the grocery store no matter how much his brain told it to. He said, and I quote: “it presents externally to the outside world as laziness, it’s actually a WAR between mind and body to get done what you know needs to get done.”

Wait, do I have ADHD? Yall. Listen to WHEN I read this. So I posted the other day about having a legitimate panic attack. I did. I’ve had a few. Because I’m insanely stressed. You know what I’ve been most stressed about? Needing to clean up the backyard around the pool. Hear me out.

So it’s surrounded by rocks. Every year I have to rake out all the branches and leaves and bullshit that piles up in there and not rake out all the rocks. I need to pull weeds. I gotta spray poisons. It’s a huge effort. And the weeds will just come back over and over and over and over again. All fucking summer. It’s a nightmare and I HATE IT. Those pool rocks were the WORST decision we made with this house. Seriously the number one worst decision. I cannot emphasize that enough. The rocks are my #1 regret about this house. Need more closets downstairs? No, IT’S THE ROCKS. No lighting in the backyard for night swimming? Did you hear me say ROCKS? It’s the motherfucking rocks.

If the rocks weren’t there, the yard guy could just mow those weeds along with all the other weeds. Easy peasy! And this years there’s kind a bigger onus on it. I got the hammock and stand I wanted for Christmas — awesome. So like, I need to clean up and put it somewhere. Maybe buy some paving stones to get to it (BECAUSE ROCKS). So like I need to do this thing. And I’ve needed to do it for a month and I can’t make myself do it. Not because I’m having fun. No, I’m not having fun. I’m napping on my couch because fuck, I’ve got so much that needs to get done and I’m STRESSING OUT.

So today, I wake up and grab my phone. Good weather today and tomorrow. Oh no. The forecast of rain was the reason I couldn’t spray the poison. So that means today would be a great day to do the thing. So I stayed in bed for almost 3 hours. Just going “no.” Because if I don’t get out of bed I don’t have to make decisions. HA! Logic. And then I read M’s post about the grocery store. And I realized I have caused myself actual physical pain over not getting this done. Fuck it, I’m doing it.

I didn’t even eat breakfast. I got dressed in my overalls. I ate half a chocolate bar and grabbed some poweraids and went outside. Note, I actually went back inside to put sunscreen over my tattoo — important for later.

So MK was actually opening my pool when I got up! Awesome! So this was a bit late to be getting this done. However, it meant I had he and his daughter for conversation as I did it which was super nice. So I pulled the weeds I could get roots on and sprayed the rest. I did not rake up the leaves and stuff, but just doing SOMETHING was massive. So I’m super happy I got that done. Also, note that I took a LOT longer than I expected. Like a few hours. And I only sunscreened the tattoo. So…. there’s a tan line around the tattoo now…

Not sure if that’s a great advertisement for the sunscreen or not. Maybe? I’d still only give it 3 stars out of 5. It’s mineral sunscreen stick so the zinc very much whites out the area — even though it says “sheer.” It was also very thick. So great for a day on the lake. However, I was hoping it would be a good everyday protection this summer. I’m not whiting out my tattoo everyday. So if anyone has good sunscreen suggestions, send them my way. Highest SPF available if possible. I’ll be swimming in long sleeve rashguards but I need something for general daily wear. This ones great for sweaty activities like yard work. Or I guess swimming, if I was gonna risk that.

Anyway, so I treated the weeds! Finally! But tragic news. This year there’s poison ivy in the rocks. Yall, I’m SEVERELY allergic to poison ivy. I didn’t notice it until I was spraying. Which means I was probably all up in it when weeding by hand. UGH. So after I finished up everything, I dumped everything (even the hat) in a hot wash and hopped in the shower. I recruited Husband to scrub my back for me with the instruction to scrub like you’re trying to peel off a layer of skin. I washed thoroughly like 3 times. My skin was squeaking. So I’m praying I don’t get a rash. Dear god PLEASE no rash and hives. PLEASE.

Husband is letting me get a quote to do a ground level patio/deck and removing the rocks. I have literally no idea the ballpark that would even cost. So our builder is coming over and I’m gonna get him to do a quote for the lower patio (concrete, wood, composite? Don’t care) and then a quote for getting this god forsaken evil rocks out of my life. Hopefully, I’ll meet with him tomorrow. I say hopefully because he was supposed to meet with me Friday and then today and neither happened. PLEASE TAKE THE ROCKS AWAY.

On my Arm Lift. And tattoo.

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Usually, I write off my brachioplasty (arm lift) results. There’s multiple reasons. I didn’t get liposuction (would have if I knew to ask!) so I still have really big arms. I also still have that obnoxious fat overhang on my elbow. So I’m usually frustrated with it. Like I went through ALL THAT and still have huge arms. Really? This shit was so expensive too!

Also, when you compare my other surgeries, those are just far more impressive. I had a stomach pouch for years even after I lost weight so tummy tuck — huge. And boobs — they make every single outfit look better. Combine those two, and there’s so much oomph! This is the only time in my whole life where my breasts have stuck out further than my stomach. Seriously. I’m pretty sure I was fat before I grew breasts, so yeah. I mean the abdomen is just a complete overhaul. The difference is amazing. So yeah, I’m usually not too jazzed about the arms in comparison. Also huge scars. I’m not terribly bothered by the scars but I am disappointed that they looked like they would be so perfect and neat right after surgery but have since expanded.

HOWEVER (yes, in all caps), if you look at old photos, the arms do look hella better. They’re not all floppy either. There was a good bit of skin removed there. Before this, I’d never have worn a tank top to work. I’d CERTAINLY never have considered a tattoo sleeve. Fat flabby arms can’t have tattoo sleeves. Now that I have tighter arms and working on a fucking fabulous tattoo sleeve, I’m all about some tank tops.

Whenever an ad for a sale at Lane Bryant or Torrid pops up, I’m like “do they have any work-appropriate tanks tops?” I have a smallish collection of work tank tops hanging in my closet now. They’re my favorite to wear. I gotta show of my sweet tat.

I know it’s a work in progress. I can’t wait till we do the shoulder! But it’s nice and substantial and damn cool already. Hopefully, it greatly detracts from my balding head and acne/hairy/PCOS chin. No seriously, I’m having big issues about feeling ugly so let’s all look at the boobs and tattoo. Oooooooo.

I’m so so so glad it has my Jack in it. I miss him so much. I rub between his eyes and tell him I miss him. (He liked having me scratch right between his eyes sometimes). So I do frequently look at it and touch his little face. And people love it.

Almost everywhere I go, someone comments on it. Seriously. Just about everywhere. “Love your tattoo!” “Gorgeous tattoo!” “Who did your tattoo?” “Is that a cat!?” “Where’d you get it done?” “That work is amazing.” “Holy shit! I love it!” It’s a hype piece. A conversation starter for sure. I love it! Nearly everywhere I go, it’s mentioned.

(And yeah, hopefully it’s drawing attention away from my face. Look at my cleavage or something.)

Review: BAGLHER Pet Carrier Backpack

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It’s time for another review! I told you, I’ve been buy a lot of shit for the cat. This time it’s for his carrier! Or as Amazon likes to call it, the “BAGLHER Pet Carrier Backpack, Ventilated Design, Pet Travel Backpack with Comfortable Shoulder Straps, Thicker Bottom Support, Two-Way Entrance Pet Carrier Backpack, Black“. I don’t know why it says black, because that’s obviously the grey one, but whatever. I got grey for $33.29. Here we go:

I just purchased this backpack for my new cat.  I had two carriers from my previous cats.  However, those carriers were obscenely expensive and had a ton of features I didn’t need.  Like wheels.  This made them heavy and awkward as hell.  So I decided to retire them and find something new. 

I settled on a backpack because I loved the idea of letting my cat peak his head out of the top.  So I looked at a lot of backpacks.  I had a few requirements:

* Lots of mesh for breathing. (No plastic.  Sure that bubble is see-thru and maybe even cute until it gets filthy with nose prints.)

* I wanted pockets for keeping important things like rabies tags. 

* I also decided I wanted the bottom to be solid all the way around.  This way my cat could lay down and have privacy if they were scared. 

I took looks into account as well and picked this one.  It came just in time for me to pick up my new little guy!  I’ve had it for almost a month now and it’s already been through the ringer!  He’s been to the vet.  I took him to the grocery store (because why not).  We also took him for a walk outside and he pooped in it.  So it’s also been washed!  So I feel like I can really review this bag now. 

PROS:

  • Tons of mesh for airflow.
  • The bottom is solid on all sides so my cat can lay down for privacy.
  • Pockets!  I didn’t even expect to use the two side mesh pockets.  However, as you can see in my pictures – my wallet ended up in one and his medication from the vet ended up in the other. 
  • Three entryways.  Both sides of this open up wide and the top opens.  I find it easiest to stick him in the side. 
  • Washable!  Did I mention he pooped in it?  Well, I washed it and we’re fine!  I was afraid the bottom liner would shrink.  It’s just zippered over a piece of cardboard-ish material (see photo).  I popped it in the hot wash and air dried it and it fit back perfectly.  No shrinkage.
  • My cat can sit up.  I had never considered that my cat might want to sit up instead of being forced to hunch down as in a traditional carrier.  But he really likes to sit up.  He’s laid down in it once.  But he vastly prefers to sit up.  The top opening lets him look out perfectly. 
  • The fact that it’s taller than a normal carrier means I can buckle it in!  See my photo to see my cat buckled up and sitting pretty ready to go for a ride in the car.
  • Soft carrier.  This is a must for me because I had a cat that would throw herself against the side of her carrier in a panic.  So I always go for a soft carrier for cat safety. 
  • The smaller footprint makes carrying this around less awkward. 
  • It’s a backpack, so you can wear it hands free.
  • I love the way the top opening rolls up and velcros in place.  I leave this sitting around with the top open in case my cat wants to hop in it in to sleep. 
  • The top handle is nice and secure – thick and comfortable to hold.  I like it for carrying.  It’s not just for looks. 
  • It’s a good looking bag.  I got the grey and don’t mind it sitting out in my house.  It’s not ugly. 
  • It folds up for storage.

CONS:

  • Not super high quality.  You get what you pay for and this is insanely inexpensive.  That means your gonna sacrifice a bit on quality.  In this case the bottom is only cardboard and the zippers are not exceptional. 
  • Yeah, that harness clip is worthless.  I had hopes of buckling in my cat so I could open the top for him to poke his head out.  Not gonna happen.  The harness clip is on a long tether and attached to the top of the shoulder straps.  Meaning your cat can easily and comfortably get out and sit beside this thing.  I’m actually contemplating cutting if off and sewing a shorter length to the middle or bottom of the bag. 
  • It’s a bit small.  The dimensions are 12″L x 10″W x 15.5″H.  So that means the bottom pad is only 12” x 10”.  My cat can curl up in there – but he’s only 9.5lbs.  I’m afraid he might outgrow this.  For the price, that’s fine.  However, be warned – no medium or large cats.  Only small cats. 
  • I wish it had support around the sides.  Some bags have steel support to keep their shape.  This does not.  So sometimes when wearing it as a backpack, the top can scrunch and take away some of the head room. 
  • In practice, when walking with this as a backpack, there’s a lot of swaying for the pet inside.  We found that my large hips swing a bit too much so we switched to my very slender husband for the walk.  Even then he was swaying back and forth a good bit. 

SUMMARY:

I’m super happy with this purchase.  I gave it 4 stars because it is by no means perfect.  I probably won’t be using the backpack feature anymore.  However, I like the taller bag with a smaller foot print.  It’s easier to carry and buckle in the car.  Also my cat likes to sit up and see what’s going on.  Love all the mesh and various entry ways.  Already had to clean up a worst-case-scenario and it’s still as good as new! 

100% worth the price.  One of my friends already asked him to send him the link so he could purchase one. 

Yes, that’s a gratuitous tattoo shot. You’ll survive.

Tattoo Update – Sleeve Session 3

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Friday, we did a bit more work on the tattoo sleeve. I haven’t been excited for this session for two reasons. One, it was small session to finish up what we didn’t last session before we break for summer. Two, It was gonna hurt. Elbow and inner elbow. Yikes. We had done the pumpkin “shard” in this area last session and it was the most painful bit so far. So it was safe to assume this whole appointment was going to suck. Also, the last one hadn’t went that great. But a tattooin’ I went.

I was right, it hurt. Surprisingly the elbow more than the inner elbow. But jack has a tail now and some bright red leaves. We’re breaking for summer now so I can heal up and use my pool!

Tattoo by Devon Greig of Alchemy Tattoo.

So after last session, it was clear we weren’t on the same page of where this tattoo was going. So I told her that after this session, I wanted to get some sharpies out so we were on the same page when we pick up in October. Well, she wanted to do that FIRST (that’s why you see all the sharpie on my shoulder in that picture). If she used the sharpies after I was tattooed, she’d have to toss them because of contamination. So we played around with markers beforehand.

We had a pretty solid concept of what was going on above Jack, and that is next place we’re going. I also came around to the idea that it doesn’t have to wrap around my arm. I love the sharp relief of the detailed leaves againt my bare skin. Also, it’s pretty damn impactful and distracts from my scars as it is. Plus the detail is so fine that I wondered if it would get muddied and lost with too much. And you’ll also recall, I wasn’t thrilled with adding more “stuff” I didn’t care about just to take up space.

We had discussed a squash vine below — going down my arm with squash blossoms. However, I had a better idea. If we’re doing flowers, why not do flowers I liked? Also K and I discussed doing matching dahlias or poppies. So I thought, yeah I could do fall flowers… like… from MY WEDDING BOUQUET. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not about celebrating my wedding (though I do love my sweetie). It’s about how gorgeous that bouquet was and how it was totally my ascetic. It would look great with this tattoo. So I pulled up some pictures. She was completely onboard! So this appointment was like the opposite of last.

So we decided to pull a flower in the top (it’s still mostly leaves) and some berries so it would be cohesive. We added swirls. More leaves. Bats! We bulked up the design towards the back of my arm. I told her the areas I wanted to cover (apparently this is a surprise to some. I don’t like when sleeves just cut off at the top of your arm. I’m not a barbie doll with a removable arm seam. I like the idea of how robotic arms connect — like the shoulder is part of the whole thing. Or as I’ve said, raglan sleeves. So my vision was always it going up onto my shoulder). So she played around with sharpies for almost an hour.

Not only did this get us on the same page, but she was able to sketch to fit my anatomy and take pictures for when she does the actual templates to apply in Fall. Also, this made me SO EXCITED. I am so sad we can’t fit in another session before summer! Look how AMAZING this is going to look:

Tattoo and sketches by Devon Greig of Alchemy Tattoo.

As you can see, we played around with the front a lot. Turns out I wanted less there than I thought. I am IN LOVE with the back. My swirls! I’m also confident the green frame behind Jack was an excellent choice.

So I am pumped. We scheduled my appointments for October, November, and December to get the top done (I hope?). Then we can schedule some Spring appointments to get working on the lower arm. I’m very thrilled with where this is going.

Cat Food. Also Mario.

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Louie

I’m trying to review a lot of the things I’ve purchased for Louie. Which, of course, is a lot of things. But I can’t review these odor eliminating products. Why? Because I just chunked everything available at the problem so there’s too many variables.

I have charcoal bags. Charcoal and baking soda litter freshener. Gel odor absorbers. A little soapish paw print that I tossed in the litterbox. Bath and Body Works Plug-In and candles. Cause Louie has some kind of digestive issues.

I mentioned his gas problem in a previous post (clicky). So I took him to the vet the day after I got him. They prescribed him prebiotics and they did a lot! His gas is a million times better. Our house had just smelled like cat diarrhea. Now we’re doing good. However, his poop smells beyond foul. Yall, it’s bad. Hence the barrage of odor solutions. It’s been two weeks so it’s not anxiety. So time to switch his food. I researched foods for pet food specific for this problem and was recommended Blue Buffalo: Grain-Free and Natural Balance: Limited Ingredients by Google. I asked the vet what they would recommend but they said they don’t recommend specific foods because different food work for different pets. Kinda sounded like bullshit, but whatever.

So Blue Buffalo is good ingredients, but don’t I need to figure out what he’s having issues with? So I chose Natural Balance: Limited Ingredients. We’re switching now. He hasn’t noticed because he’s a vacuum. I hope this gets rid of the smelly poop. I’ve got the house under control, but once you open that litter closet — DAMN.

Also, as to him being a vacuum. I feel bad. I free fed Jack and Tabitha so they always had food available. I tried that with Louie and he ate more than a days worth in like an hour. So Louie gets fed twice a day but he eats it immediately. So I feel bad for him. But I don’t want him to turn into a basketball either. No conclusion to the paragraph, I just feels bad, ya know?

Mario

Have you seen the new Mario movie? It’s fucking fantastic, if you have not. Well, if you like Mario it’s fantastic. It’s a kids movie so we’re not looking at Oscar material here. However, if you know the Mario games and appreciate them, it’s awesome. I was worried because I don’t like Donkey Kong and he’s obviously a big part of it — but Seth Rogen played him great. It was basically just Seth Rogen in a monkey suit and it was fine. Also, Bowser was Jack Black. And it was HILARIOUS. Jack Black is obsessed with Princess Peach and want to marry her. Jack Black sings about her. It’s perfect. I love Tenacious D, so I’ve had the “Peaches” song in my head for over a week. And that’s impressive considering the lyrics are mostly just “peaches peaches peaches peaches peaches.”

The absolute standout though — Lumalee. In Bowser’s prison, there is a demented Luma. We cut to Bowser’s prison throughout the film — the penguins are there (OMG, I have to have some kind of King Penguin merch). Luigi ends up there. And Lumalee is always there. And all Lumalee wants is the sweet release of death. Yall, demented Luma is so fucked up and amazing. I have no idea how they decided to put that in the movie — but my god, it made it wonderful. Lumalee is constantly dancing and singing and user his magic — but he’s dark as fuck. He calls Luigi “more meat for the grinder” when he arrives. And when he’s about to die in the climax, he lays down in his cage and says “finally.” Of course they’re rescued and all you see is Lumalee laying there saying “boooooooo.”

The move ends and it’s good — we’re all happy. Them Lumalee pops up to say that was a happy ending. Except now there is nothing left but the emptiness and the void. What the actual fuck? I’m sorry to the parents that had kids there who heard me say “what the fuck” every time Lumalee said something. I’d want Lumalee merch, but I feel the only way it would be good is if it had the lines from the film. Like maybe a stuffed Lumalee and when you squeeze it, it just says dark shit. 100% would buy.

Review: Made4Pets Modern Cat Tower

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 2 Comments on Review: Made4Pets Modern Cat Tower

This review is for Louie’s new cat tower. Or, as Amazon likes to call it: “Made4Pets Cat Tree Modern Cat Tower Featuring with Fully Sisal Covering Scratching Posts, Deluxe Condos and Large Space Capsule Nest.” This is listed at $159.99 right now, but there was a $17 off coupon on it when I ordered.

Not sure where to start this review.  A pro/con list?  Let’s start with getting the package.    This thing was packaged wonderfully.  Was there a ton of excess trash because of that? Yes.  However, I appreciated that the acrylic bowl was situated in custom cut styrofoam to keep it from getting damaged.  I also liked how organized all the assembly bits were in their neat tray.  Just don’t open them upside down, like I did. 

First, I laid everything out.  Then I was intimidated.  I love assembling furniture, but I have to say, this had a lot of pieces.  The first thing I noticed, out of the box —  All of the particle board pieces are completely finished on all sides – even those that meet and don’t show.  That’s really nice.  I wasn’t thrilled that the front and back pieces are just thin laminate and not solid “wood.”  However, I did note that it would be easy to switch those two pieces so this tree could face left or right.  That’s nice.  The biggest con was the assembly method.  It uses cam lock fasteners.  I hate these things.  They just don’t make for sturdy fasteners.  They give too much wobble. 

The instructions were pretty good.  I’d watch the video first.  I did not.  Had I done that, I probably wouldn’t have done step 6 upside down and had to back track.  Do you know how hard it is to get cam locks out?  Real hard.  Note that on the piece with the two entrance holes, there are predrilled holes towards the top for the top stair.  It’s not just symmetrical. 

Also, I posted a picture with some markups.  100% switch steps 11 and 12.  This is stupid – do 12 first.  That saves you from “some” of the gymnastics to get step 11 done.  Good lord, good luck.  You’re going in blind – literally, and trying to fasten things you can’t see at strange angels upside down.  God speed. 

That said, my cat was all over this thing during assembly.  He loves it!  I was putting the rug mats on and he was already climbing it and getting in my way.  He went under the bowl and started attacking those four scratchers immediately.  I sat him in the bowl and he started attacking the corner balls.  Tons of fun for the cat.  He hasn’t been into hiding in the boxes, but I, at least, appreciate the very fluffy butt pillows that are in there. 

I found that he loved the bowl if I put him in it, but wouldn’t jump in it on his own.  I think that’s because he can’t see that it’s a solid place to jump.  So I put a blanket in there.   I know, this limited the adorable toe beans and scrunched-up-cat-cuteness, but it’s probably more cozy with the blanket anyway.  Even if it does distract from the clean aesthetics.  Now that the blanket is in there, this is his GO-TO spot.  He just trots up the stairs and gets in his little bowl.  My husband says that’s mostly where he hangs out when I’m at work. 

I bought this for the high bowl for him to hang out in.  I wanted him to have a high place to sit in the window.  This is perfect!  He sits in the bowl and watches the people go by in the front window.  I have to leave those blinds open for him.  It is his favorite spot in the house.  I also bought this for the clean design.  Thank you so much, for not covering this thing in carpet!  I hate those ugly cat trees!  Also, if he barfs on it, I can wipe it up or wash the part he barfed on (the rug pads are velcroed on). 

So in summary, I do love the finished product.  If it was screwed together and not held together with cam locks, it would be 5 stars for SURE.  Even with the cam locks, it’s pretty sturdy.  My cat has leapt at this thing and it’s been completely fine.  He loves it, I’m happy with the look.  It’s great.  So I give it 4 stars.