Category: Plants & Gardening

Listen to the SMEs.

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on Listen to the SMEs.

So THIS is why people just save lemongrass stalks from year to year and no one grows from seed.

I cut those stalks clean not 48 hours ago. This is only the second time I’ve watered them. I cut all the leaves off so they’d focus on root growth. All 8 stalks have new shoots like a centimeter long! Even the one that had like no roots and just a bulb nub.

Y’all, my seedlings have been under 2 inches for like a month. I’ve got them out there with a grow light and a fan on a timer. Gave them miracle grow under watered for three days now. NO DIFFERENCE.

The experts know what they’re doing. Wish I’d done more research months ago and learned how they propagate them before I jumped in with seeds. These stalks were way more expensive than seed, but far cheaper than a lemongrass plant. From now on, we doing this every year.

No pumpkin sprouts yet.

Gardening and Back Aches

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 2 Comments on Gardening and Back Aches

The Squirrel Dilemma

So where were we? Ah yes, I was complaining about the frogs that tried to kill me when I watered my overwintered plants outside for the first time. Yes. I now have three sun ferns and some mandevillas out back plus the same porch plants from last year.

Problem is… squirrels. I love squirrels, don’t get me wrong. But they start digging up all my plants. Every single pot. Look at this motherfucker on my Ring camera:

I couldn’t figure it out. I thought they might be burying the peanuts I feed them. I dug around in the pots and found no nuts. I went to the internet. Apparently, they dig around for stuff that might have been buried last Fall? What the fuck? I just potted these. There’s nothing there, dumbass. Why haven’t I ever seen them dig elsewhere? I hate to jinx myself, but they don’t dig up my flower beds. I don’t see little holes all around my yard.

They weren’t just looking once either. They were digging them up multiple times a day. One day, my Mandevillas had their damn roots exposed! So something had to be done. For what I had out already, I just used the bastard pool rocks. I just put rocks all around the plant in the pot. I’m not sure about this for the ferns though, because they will want to expand. Maybe I can remove them later. We’ll see about those. For the others, it’s a great solution. They haven’t bothered them since.

But what about my lemongrass and pumpkins? Those will be seedlings. I can put rocks around those. So I decided on critter mesh to keep… well… critters away. So I proposed an errand day to my friends. We went to Cat Bird Seat and Lowe’s.

I needed to replace a dying succulent in my table center piece. I needed dirt for my pumpkins and lemongrass. And, of course, critter netting. So I set out with K, K2, and K’s SO.

Don’t shop for plants with friends (AKA “Enablers”)

We went to Cat Bird Seat first. Just a local plant place. They’re super close and also on the way to the big box stores. K2 proposed that they would have a better succulent collection. Unfortunately, they didn’t have a nice colorful one like the one I was replacing. They did, however, have a large selection. I narrowed it down to two little guys. One I chose for the color pop of pink edges. The other for the quirkiness. I presented my two options to my friends to ask which I should go for. They insisted I get both. I told them I only had room for one. They suggested I get another tiny pot and go for “levels.”

Goddammit they were right. I got them both plus a super tiny pot from Lowe’s. A few weeks ago I already added river rocks to this centerpiece because the bottom of the terrarium was showing rust. Now it’s like major upgrade. I already had the main pot on the riser. I just slid it to the side a bit for the little guy. LOOK AT THE LEVELS. It’s so dynamic. And the rocks look great.

PUMPKINS!

So then we headed to Lowe’s. Why Lowe’s? Because Lowe’s and Home Depot are very close together and K was in the left lane which went towards Lowe’s. Highly complex decision making, clearly. It worked out great though. They had a sweet deal on dirt! One cubic foot of fertilized top soil for $2. That’s a steal! I got regular top soil that wasn’t fertilized for $2.99 and thought THAT was a good deal. I need a lot for my 5 pumpkin pots.

Well, they’re aren’t pots, per se. They’re actually nursery bags inside nursery fabric pots. The bags, which won’t break down, are ugly and just for growing, not showing. The fabric pots are nicer, but they are biodegradable. So I combined the two so I can reuse them. Fabric pot on the outside, lined with a bag on the inside. Yes, the bottom of the fabric pot will still be wet, but I hope to get a few seasons out of them. Also, the fabric pots would drain from all areas. With the bag, only the drainage holes will drain.

Anyway, I needed to get these pumpkins out ASAP. I knew they needed to go out in May. After the clusterfuck of lemongrass seeds that wouldn’t sprout, I need to get them out on time. That way if I have bad seeds, I can buy new seeds and still get pumpkins. So I spent the weekend filling my pots. I did NOT buy enough dirt. I figured one bag would be plenty per pot. I was wrong. Each pot took two bags. So yeah, I had to go BACK to Lowe’s on Sunday for even more dirt. (Also, I did look up how big a pot I would need for a pumpkin. 20 gallons. That’s why I couldn’t afford to buy actual pots.)

Now these pots are heavy. Thank god for my garden wagon! I managed to get them all out. I used broken umbrella pieces (not a hoarder) and tennis balls to hold up the critter netting. I used it doubled over and tucked it under the pots on the front and sides. Then I used 3 packs of binder clips to secure the back so I can have access as needed.

Once the vines grow long enough, I will lay out a sunshade over the rocks to keep the weeds out and allow the vines to stay neatly on top. I chose a sunshade because mesh tarps are crazy expensive. I don’t need anything strong, I need something that blocks light but is water permeable. So sunshade! I’ll buy some more critter netting to go over the vines too. Not sure how I’ll hold the netting up as I’m out of umbrella parts.

So may I introduce you to the very first day of my very first pumpkin patch!

But wait, there’s more.

I was researching caring for pumpkins so I can nail this. And everyone kept mentioning planting in July. Why July? I need 120 days to mature on the big ones and 90 on the small — that’s 4 months! Oh… fuck me. October is the TENTH month. So I need to plant them… in the SIXTH month… which is June.

Fuck me.

So if these grow, I’m going to get my small pumpkins in 90 days which is… early August. Yeah… that’s not gonna last till Halloween.

Fuck me.

So I guess this is a tester batch to see if these seeds sprout. Yeah. That’s it. I’ll pluck them when they do and replant at the correct date. Ignore the stupid person.

The Lemongrass Experiment

On to the lemongrass. Well, I fear I planted this one too late. The seedlings are so very tiny. I needed to get the domes off so I moved them to the garage. I’m going to stop top watering and switch to bottom watering with a bit of miracle grow. I also set up a fan to start hardening them up. It will run on its lowest setting for 4 hours on, 4 hours off, rinse and repeat.

Also, I’ve done so much lemongrass research. The reason I had difficulty finding seeds was that no one grows from seed. They grow from last years harvest. At the end of the season, you dig up the stalk and peel away all the leaves. Wash it really good so that there’s no dirt and a little bit of roots. Put all your stalks in a vase with cold water that you change out every week. Then next year, plop the stalk in the ground and your plant comes back. Obviously, I will do this from here on out if my lemongrass is successful.

To give my tiny baby lemongrass a boost, I did buy 8 stalks of wintered lemongrass. I got those planted up today in smaller, more colorful fabric pots. When my seedlings are ready to go, I can put those in there too. Since I want a lot of grass blades, I can plant a lot close together. Each plant will only put out between 10 and 20 blades. I’m growing them for the oils and scent, not for cooking. So I’m not trying to get thick juicy stalks.

They are currently in the garage because I need more critter mesh to cover them before they go outside. Hopefully, I will get them out tomorrow as I do not have another grow light. I should have had enough critter mesh, but I doubled up over the pumpkin patch. So tomorrow, I can add critter mesh and get those out in the sun.

I’ll continue rotating my seedings and hardening them up in the garage until they’re a bit more ready to go outside.

Lord, I Forgot About the Frogs in the Watering Can!

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 1 Comment on Lord, I Forgot About the Frogs in the Watering Can!

This weekend , I repotted and generally took care of my over-wintered plants. Two Red Banana Trees, eight White Rio Mandevillas, and a giant sun fern. They lived in my master bedroom all winter with a sunlamp. I’ve been wanting to get them out because the Mandevillas are starting to smell very sweet. They’re waking up. So this weekend everyone went outside in big pots with fresh dirt.

So today, Monday, I go water them on my lunch break. Another advantage to working from home! So I grab my water can from the front porch (oh sorry, STANLEY’S STOOP). I water the plants there and go inside to get more water from the kitchen on my way to the back deck. I set my watering can in the sink and start filling.

FROG.

Now, y’all, my house gets a lot of frogs. My pool has the bubblers that sound like a running river. We live next to apartments with little retention ponds with fountains. We got frogs. These guys:

In the summer they cling to our windows to catch bugs attracted to the lights. During the day they sleep in my pool umbrellas and hide under the pillows. (Always check the pillows and umbrellas before sitting and opening because you will be attacked otherwise.)

So. These things scare me. I can’t explain it because I know they absolutely will not hurt me. But my god they are so quick and jumpy and they will JUMP ON YOUR FACE. Yes, it HAS HAPPENED TO ME. So, if I’m looking for them, I’m cool. Like I might have a jump scare if one moves when I find it, but it’s fine. If I’m not expecting to see one, my god, I will scream. Not like a long scream but an extremely loud full on scream.

Like when husband comes to bed with out loudly stating his presence when I’m “sleeping”. That kinda scream. Like the instinct of “I’m about to die” with the quick realization of “I’m ok”.

And in the summer, these motherfuckers love my umbrellas and my watering cans. Big two gallons of shade. Fuck yeah. Personal frog grotto, bitches. I get it. But I forgot. And you can’t see them in there because there’s only a small filling hole. Like this. Great watering can. Totally recommend.

So when I turn on the water, Big Bertha comes up to the fill hole. I scream. Husband is in work meeting. He usually handles the frogs. It’s ok, it’s in the can still… I get solo cup. I got this.

I get solo cup and quickly pounce over the hole while the waters still running. Got you, bitch! Then I scream bloody murder because there was a baby Bertha in there too and now it’s on my window sill!

So I get the solo cup covered can outside and set it down. Will worry about Big Bertha later. Gotta catch baby. There was much screaming. I get baby Bertha in the cup and run outside to release it. It jumps out of the cup and I scream. Cause that’s what I do. And THEN I have to call out “IM FINE! JUST A FROG!” Cause all the neighbors can here me.

Oy. I forgot about those fuckers in my watering cans. Last year Louie had a field day when I brought the watering can inside so frogs wouldn’t get in it… Not knowing there was a frog in it.

Anyway, I watered the plants with the solo cup over the hole so. Big Bertha wouldn’t attack me and then dumped her out. Now the can is INSIDE.

Why don’t these things come with a lid or a plug? I usually just have to water my deck plants with one hanging out on the can like this the whole time:

Yeah, that motherfucker sat there while I watered every single plant.

Life Hack

Also, I know I’m 41 and the daughter of a gardener extraordinair. I’m also lazy as fuck. So I’ve never over wintered my plants before. Holy shit, FREE PLANTS! I’ve got, like, $200+ worth of plants out there!

The Red Banana Trees with Mandevillas are back on the front porch. They thrived last year. This year, I removed one of the 4 Mandevillas from each pot. I also put them in much bigger pots and made a taller trellis on the side against the columns for the vines to grow up. Last year it was a hot mess and I kept wadding them up in a tomatoe-cage-like structure around the Banana Tree and they were barely contained and the Banana Tree suffered from lack of light.

The small sun fern I bought last year is HUMONGOUS. I knew I’d have to divide it, but I ended up dividing it into three! Three sun ferns the same size as this one was when I bought it.

Also, have you ever devided a fern? For fucks sake, I did not expect that difficulty. I tried to just dive in with a trowel. Nope. So I grabbed my machete. Nope. So I used the saw blade side of the machete. Nope. I ended up sawing the rootball easily enough, but damn, getting through the matted top layer was like WTF? I’ve trimmed hedges easier than that.

They’re fine. Still plenty of roots and green stems for each third. And little bulb things… Are those fern bulbs? Do ferns make bulbs?

I also have the two Mandevillas I thinned out in another pot. I’m going to let them grow over the back stair railing. See: FREE PLANTS.

If my lemongrass works out, I probably won’t buy anymore plants this year.

Overwintering sucks though. I have a cat. Plants a big and heavy. The garage is freezing. So this winter, I have a plan! I’m going to buy a popup green house (basically a popup tent) and put it where my gardening table is. Plenty of room. Stick some grow lights in there and buy a little greenhouse heater. Should only cost $200 all together and it already saved me that much this year!

Probably gonna start a compost heap for dirt too. I got an acre so I can put it way back in the corner of the property.

I watched a lemongrass tutorial and I think I found why the seeds are so hard to get. No one grows it from seed. They pull up the main stalk with barely any roots, trim it down to a few inches, strip off the outer layers, wash off the dirt, and stick them in cold water to over winter. Change the water out once a week and come spring, stick ’em back in the ground. So I’ll be doing that this year if I’m successful.

They also taught me how to weave little grass bundles for cooking and tea. So if anyone wants those, I should have a ton come fall!

Seed Nerds AKA seednerds.com is a SCAM: A Review

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 5 Comments on Seed Nerds AKA seednerds.com is a SCAM: A Review

Putting this out there for all the fellow gardeners. seednerds.com is a scam. They present as a legit company based in California. They fooled me. I made purchase and was notified that I had made an international transaction on my credit card. This is the only indication I had that they were not CONUS.

I called the number to cancel my order. Fake number. I googled the address. Real address — I did street view — it’s a shipping warehouse.

Yeah, that is not an image of a “50-acre farm […which also…] partner[s] with local beekeepers to set up honeybee hives and with free-range chicken farmers to provide help with pest control and composting.”

I sent three emails to cancel the order. They just stonewall and ask for more information. After a few weeks, I get a shipping notice. So I wait for my seeds so I can return them. After all, they have a return policy:

I just need to email them and they’ll send me a shipping label. False. One, they informed me they moved their warehouse to china so I will have to pay to return them. OK, bitches, give me the address. Now I’ve sent six emails with continuous stalls and asking for more information and pictures. Pictures like this of seed packs with NO LABELS EVEN:

When I googled them back in early march, I didn’t find a lot of negative information. Now there is tons:

Seednerds.com review (scam site)
byu/pxlchk1 ingardening

https://www.facebook.com/seednerds/reviews

https://www.trustpilot.com/review/seednerds.com

So throw this hat in the ring. Seed Nerds or Seednerds.com with this contact information:

Business Address: 11010 Juniper Ave, Fontana, CA 92337, USA

E-Mail: info@seednerds.com

Phone: (716) 217-9642

Please call us from 9:00 am to 5:00 pm, Monday through Friday, Pacific Standard Time

IS A SCAM. FRAUD. FAKE. CHINESE ASSHOLES.

***********Update on my Lemongrass************

So out of the THREE packs of seeds I’ve ordered from people — ONE is doing well. The plants came up quickly but do not seem to be growing much — unlike the first set of fake lemon grass that shot up like… well, regular old grass. The third contender hasn’t sprouted a single plant. And obviously, I can’t even plant this chinese shit.

I fear I will not have nearly as many plants as I had hoped.

A St Patty’s Day Miracle!

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So I found myself looking for four-leaf clovers today. I needed to wait outside, and I like to find them. Plus, Saint Patrick’s Day! I did well. Once I found five, I was like well, fuck, I gotta make it seven for the holiday. So I scoured. Number seven was elusive. I had left number one on the steps and was sure it would have blown away before I got the seventh.

I was in my PJs in the front yard on a main road. So I wasn’t comfortable leaving my yard to be the crazy lady on the side of a four-lane main road in her pajamas looking creepily at the ground. I mean, my own yard is enough already. I’m still the insanely weird lady — but like, on a leash. “She’s keeping to her own yard” – ya know? Even though there are MASSIVE patches of huge clovers over there. So like, my hunting area was limited.

I was thinking to myself how I can only do this because I’m really good at patterns. I think others could if they cared to. It’s like those picture puzzles online with a ton of 8’s or something and you have to find the 9. People love those, but they don’t apply it to real life. Don’t look at the clover patch as plants. They’re all equilateral triangles. They’re all perfect 120 angles between the leaves. Just a bunch of triangles. Now find the square. It’s quite simple. I’ve spotted them from the second story of a building before, no lie. Find the 90 degree angles. With practice, they stand out as abominations.

I’m quite good with patterns. I’ve always been focused on pinning the repeats in wall paper, fabrics, carpets. How small is the repeat. It’s quite elegant how some of them work the repeats. Very interesting to break it down to the square they are repeating. You have to break images across the square to hide it well. I’ve never created my own patterns, so there’s still a bit of mystery in how they do it. Anyway, it interests me. And after a few decades of practice, you get very good. Hence my magic power of four-leaf clover spotting.

I was about to give up with my six clovers. I was thinking how I could never find any of the more elusive clovers. The fives, the sixes, the seven leaves — they wouldn’t be as obvious in the way I find them. No squares, no 90 degree angles. And then…

There she was. My seventh. With five leaves.

Amazing. In my 41 years I’ve never found one above four. Ever. And I look. This one met my pattern — it looks like a four leaf from the top — but there’s a little baby runt leaf sticking straight out of the top. I had husband come look immediately. How special! I took a video to capture it. These are actually stills from the video.

You know, it was a bit sentimental. I haven’t done a lot since mom died. I mean, I’ve done a TON – but there are things I didn’t care to do. I used to decorate for EVERY holiday — I haven’t decorated for Easter in 4 years. Back in 2020, I actually bought a very cute leather journal to keep my four leaf clovers in. I put Jack’s foot print in it. I kept my clovers in it. There’s butterfly wings. There’s even one clover that mom found after searching with me. I made her sign it. I didn’t stop right after her death. There are clovers from 2021. But nothing from 2022 or 2023. Well, I had found a few and stuck them in my little tiny notepad to dry, but I hadn’t bothered to mark the dates or put them in the leather bound journal. It wasn’t fun anymore. My happy book wasn’t happy anymore.

This year I went out and found four a week or two ago. That’s when I noticed the lack of two years in my leather book. I put the clovers I had pressed in, but obviously I could not date them. I think what caused the resurgence was Louie’s one year adopt-aversary coming up. It’s time to add his foot print. It made me think of the leather bound journal. It inspired me to go find some clovers. And today I had thought about it but wasn’t going to. But then K needed to pick up something she’d loaned me. So I was out in the yard waiting as to give it back quickly. No need for them to have to come in and get it — they did loan it to me back in October and I hadn’t returned it yet. So I decided — why not — I’ll look while I’m waiting. Then I got to the must-find-seven.

And I did. But there’s more than JUST the five leaf. I needed a new book to press them. I’ve been using a tiny 3-inch composition notebook I got for free at some convention or training or something. The pages are too marked with dates and wrinkly now. They did a horrible job of pressing the four I found earlier this month. So I thought of a journal. I’ve had it for almost 4 years. I’ve kept it as it was sentimental, but never had a use for it. I knew it was a gift from my aunt-in-law. But I’d forgotten the circumstances. Just that it was thoughtful of her to buy it for me because it’s Star Trek and she knows I like Star Trek. Well, it’s hard backed and I needed a journal to press clovers so I grabbed it.

The card she included was tucked inside. Ahhh. It was a gift from when mom died. She had been thinking about me and saw this journal and thought I could use it. That’s why I’d kept it. It was so sweet and thoughtful of her to buy it and mail it. She wanted me to know I was in her thoughts. The time wasn’t right to use it when I got it. But now the time is right. I think of moms clover when I hunt now. She was so proud to find one. And today I was so proud to find my first five-leaf.

There’s a warmth there. A time to move on a little bit more. Kinda like a sign, if you believe in those things as I do. Louie has been helping to heal my heart of my loss of Jack. And now he’s brought back my clovers and a sweet memory of my mom. And the cherry on the cake is the journal given to me to try to ease my grief a bit making a simultaneous appearance.

Maybe it’s God. Maybe it’s mom being impressed with my overwintering of last summers plants, rescuing plants I normally would have let die to nurse them back to health, and now seeding my own plants for this summer.

I’m stepping into my destiny. Not some awesome destiny where I get a sword and a birth right. Just a tedious one where I stop letting plants die every year only to replace them. One where I nurture the sick plants back to health. One that has me out in my yard in my PJs looking for plants. Maybe one were I grow my own Halloween pumpkins.

I’d kinda rather have a sword.

Weekend in Review

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This weekend, I made Lumalee!

The mouth is pretty jacked up, so ill probably work on that. Also, I feel like the green should have started sooner. Did I do an extra blue row or something? And how did I jack up one leg so badly? I did not notice that at all while I was making it. There are parts of it I am unhappy with, but I think it’s cute. I enjoyed making it. It was very much trust the process because it look JACKED-THE-FUCK-UP until I stuffed it. I should have taken a picture.

I really liked how the designer did the top to split it off into two points — very clever IMO. There are changes I would make if I did it again, but I won’t be doing it again. Super glad I bought an extra skein of blue because I sure did need it. I want to do a red mushroom, but I think responsibly, I should do Mario first so I know I have enough red for him first.

The Christmas blanket saga continues. But I’m honestly thinking of putting it aside. It’s not a project I am enjoying at all. I hate the yarn. I have more amigurumis I want to do — but I also really want to do a sampler blanket in greys. I could pick a yarn I actually LIKE. And each rectangle will be a different stitch. I think I’ll pick like three shades of greys — like this kit on Amazon that I am not going to buy:

1) I’ve had to buy compression gloves because working the Christmas blanket has hurt my hand.

2) I’m not enjoying it. It’s a chore, not a fun hobby.

3) The sampler blanket would let me pick a yarn I enjoy working with and that isn’t so damn hard to work with!

4) I’d get to learn a lot of new stitches. And it would keep changing up and not being a slog because once I finish one rectangle, the next would be totally different.

So yeah, thinking of putting the Christmas blanket aside for more enjoyable projects.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Also this weekend, I washed the cars! I meant to wash mine inside and out, but I only got the outside done. But I also did Husband’s car. And I put it off for so long that I was still washing at dusk and got to see BATS IN THE BATHOUSE!

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I bought some of these camisoles at Duluth Trading. I’ve been living in them since. I would live in camisoles if I could. I get hot so easy. And if I’m cold, I can throw something on over it. But I can’t live in camisoles because I don’t like not wearing bras around people. I’m sorry, I’m an older generation and I don’t like my nipples showing. My boobs are awesome and do not need support — but I still have pointy nipples. Also, my mom was always braless at home growing up and it embarrassed me. Sorry mom. I wouldn’t have worn bras 24/7 either for my kids. Fuck that.

Anyway — these camisoles have the worthless “shelf bra” built in. BUT BUT BUT — with PADDED CUPS.

Holy fuck, it’s like I unlocked a new life reward. The camisole stays in place — no nip slips. and also NO POINTY NIPPLES.

Yall, they were on sale and I bought one of every color. And when the season changes, I’m gonna see if they have more colors and buy them too. You think I’m kidding? Husband is reading this thinking I spend too much money — honey, have you noticed me wearing that purple one, then the grey one, and now this teal one? Have you seen me wear anything else for like over a week? Do I have too many camisoles? Fuck yes. Burn all the others if you want to use that line of thinking. These are all I want now.

I can go out to the mailbox. My sister slept over and I didn’t have to put on a bra. I can answer the door if needed. No bras or robes required. I can live in my camisole now. It’s fucking amazing. BUY THIS SHIT (Clicky). 10 out of 10, 5 stars all the way.

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EDIT: FUCK, How could I forget? I started my first ever seed babies!

It’s all lemongrass. Lemongrass is crazy expensive, I learned last year. SO I’m just seeding a fuckton of it. It keeps mosquitoes away. I’m also gonna try to grow pumpkins this year!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Crochet pattern by AzeliaCrochet.

We’re building a deck!

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 2 Comments on We’re building a deck!

We’re building a deck for the pool! I’m so excited! Like, I’m so excited, I think I’ll clean up the chair hammock and give it’s wooden bar a paint refresh. I’m gonna put both hammocks on the deck so when K2 falls asleep in the new one, I can chill in the hammock chair.

And I can have lots of plants ’cause I can water them with the hose now! First on the list is lemon grass! It keeps mosquitoes away. I can only find tiny little lemon grass plants. But when you see pictures, you see big bushy bunches of lemon grass. How do I get that? Do I have to seed it in Spring to get that? Is that a next year thing? I’ve got a big ass pot so I could have a huge bush of it. Maybe even drop a tiki torch in there! Yeah! I asked on nextdoor if anyone has any lemongrass to spare.

Lavender is supposed to be good for mosquitos too (good meaning, they don’t like it). My first priority is keeping mosquitos away from me.

They’re gonna start on the deck next week!

YAY!

New Garden Tools!

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I got new garden tools! As a near-40-year-old, spiffy gardening tools bring me great joy. Tis the season to spring clean the flower beds! Especially since I’m having surgery next week. Shits gotta get done before then. I called out the lawn guy for an estimate on cleaning up the branches in the yard and cleaning the leaves and branches from the pool area. He tried to up-sell me on letting him take care of my flower beds. He said trimming and mulch could really spiff them up. Well, I usually take care of that myself. I just hadn’t got around to it yet. Plus I don’t like my azaleas over-trimmed. They’re supposed to look natural, not square. And don’t dare trim my spireas! They’re not yet full grown. So last weekend I got my ass out there and weeded and put down and ungodly amount of Preen (supposed to keep weeds out). And I ordered myself some new goodies.

First, a hedge trimmer. Last year I didn’t trim my hedges. It was a year of mourning. In the years before that, my mom would just bring up my sisters hedge trimmer for me to borrow that once a year you need one. Well, moms gone. So I bought my own hedge trimmer.

Click the picture for the link. Why this one? Well because all of my garden tools are 40 volt Black and Decker. This means all of my $100 batteries fit all of my equipment. Do I need three batteries to get through trimming my hedges? Nope. But I sure do need at least two batteries when I’m doing a lot of weed-eating. Keeping everything from the same line of products means a lot of cross versatility.

I was so excited to use my new hedge trimmer that I trimmed hedges on my lunch break Wednesday. Ah, the perks of working from home. I wish I had a before picture. It’s just so satisfying how nice and clean everything looks with just a bit of a trim. My Japonicas needed a hair cut badly. The azaleas got just a tad bit of a trim to even them out and keep them below the window line. I particularly like a hedge trimmer because it makes me feel so powerful. I shall cut ALL THE THINGS. But not my arm off — like a chainsaw. Chainsaws are terrifying. Hedge trimmers are satisfying without being terrifying.

What else did I order? A garden wagon.

Don’t make fun of my garden wagon! I need this thing. I hate my freaking wheel barrow — it always wants to tip over. And every year it needs new air in the tire. So I finally got a garden wagon. With solid rubber tires that won’t ever need air. And it’s huge — holds more than the wheel barrow. Holds 220lbs too! And it folds up! Fuck yeah it does! No disassembly required, just folds up. What?

God willin’ and the creek don’t rise, I’m gonna use it Sunday to pick up all those branches I trimmed and haul them off. Then I’ll use it to drag bags of mulch over to where I need them. Then Mr C can load it with 8 bags of fertilizer I bought and walk the property line and fertilize my arbor trees. Then this summer, I can use it to haul all those 40lb bags of salt and pool chemicals out to the pool. Or a load of chairs for a party.

What I’m saying is, I’m excited about this wagon.

Gardening and Weeds

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | 3 Comments on Gardening and Weeds

I’ve been doing a lot of gardening and weed assassination the past two weeks. It started because I want to get the pool area ready for staining the fence next weekend. Well, that includes before and after pictures and the weeds back there were a bee and dragonfly haven. Good for the bugs, but man it looked bad. So last weekend I did roundup all over the rocks. This weekend I took a weed-eater to knock down all the weeds.

They did not go quietly into that good night. Not only did the round-up not kill them off, but they didn’t like my weed-eater. The battery died halfway through the area. So I had to wait for it to charge up again. Then when I got going a second time, it ran out of string/line. I finished the job but inhaled so much solid pollen that I couldn’t sleep for the stopped up nose that evening. Fucking weeds. Don’t surround your pool with rocks for easy upkeep. It is the EXACT opposite. It would be so much easier to just mow some grass.

I also weeded my front flower beds because in for a penny, in for a pound. I purchased my new pool hat early so I could garden in it. It’s for sun protection, after all. I had Mr C come down and take a picture of me all gardening and being housewify. I posted it to Facebook because it made me feel so mature. Not mature in a “I can do what I want” way but more of a “I have special outfits, gloves, and hats just to garden in now — I AM the old lady from Steel Magnolias now” kinda way.

My sister commented with a matching pictures of my sweet momma in the same get up gardening in her yard. (Thats me on the right in the hat).

Mom was usually the one to weed my flowerbeds. She couldn’t sit still and got antsy, so she pretty much weeded everything every day. I mean, realistically, thats how you stay on top of it. You have to constantly be on those bastards. Sadly, this year it’s just me. Miss you, momma. But I’m super proud of my flower bed. Look at those Candy Corn Spireas! I just adore them. (See, middle age. Men buy cars and electronics, women nest).

Also I treated the bats to some new life under the bat pole. I got them some additional day lilies (they already had yellow, now they have red too) and some purple summer plant the guy at the nursery recommended. Holy shit there’s a lot of bat guano under that pole. First night I counted 37 bats leaving. There has to be more than that in there now judging by the piles of guano. I need to scope it out one night this week and see how many we’re up to. I really hope I didn’t scare them too much today by gardening under their house. I didn’t hear them screeching at me and I tried to be fast.