Author: cursingcats.com

IKEA Quest: Attach Bookcases Together

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Are you looking for a way to attach your IKEA Billy Bookcases to each other? Are you looking for how to screw them together? Glue? What do other people do?

As the youths say: I got you, fam’

Have you discovered the IKEA Barrel and Bolt Spare Parts 100402 & 100644? Are you searching the breadth of the internet for what goddamn bit size you need for your drill?

I got you, motherfucker.

You see, I am redoing my hallway. I am decluttering it with a beautiful array of IKEA Billy Bookcases. It’s fabulous. After I ordered all my cases and doors, I knew I’d need a way to attach them together. I figured I would screw them together. But I didn’t have them yet so I didn’t know how wide the sides were and therefore what screw size to buy. So I took to the great internet wasteland. I found a better way.

IKEA actually has a FAQ about this. “How do I link my BILLY bookcases?”

You’re home free, baby! But wait, the link takes you to a place to order spare parts. They want a postcode, but you keep getting an error. Why have the gods forsaken thee? Fear not friend, you are on the IKEA site for the Netherlands. Are spare parts only available to the Dutch? Do they get legal weed and free IKEA parts while the rest of us are relegated to IKEA Billy Bookcase Hacks?

Nay. You just need to find the same page on the US (or your relevant country) site. Go to your home IKEA site and find “Customer Service.” Then find the link to order “Spare Parts.” From there, click “Order Small Spare Parts” Bam, motherfucker. Free parts unlocked!

Barrel Bolt & Screw

So you want to attach your IKEA furniture together? You need a barrel bolt and screw. You can buy these at any hardware store or online. But did you know that IKEA has them for the IKEA PAX system? And you can use them for your IKEA Billy system? Oh hell yeah you can!

Yes, You just need a few spare parts. You need the pair: IKEA part 100402 and IKEA part 100644. You will need a pair for each join. I chose to join my short IKEA Billy Bookshelves with two near the top and two near the bottom of each join. For the taller ones, I added two in the middle as well. Order extra. You’re going to wait a while for them so make sure you don’t need to order more. Also, they’re free!

That’s right, bitches: FREE. Straight from IKEA. You can google these part numbers and find them on eBay and Amazon. But those people probably just got them free and are scamming you. Yeah. Just get free ones from IKEA. I got 16 of each. They arrived about a week after the shelves themselves (even though they were ordered the same day). You’re welcome.

What size drill bit do you need?

This is where I hit a road block. I scoured the internet. I looked at Reddit’s r/IKEA. I looked on IKEA’s own site. I looked at the Amazon and eBay listings. NO ONE said what size drill bit I needed. What the actual fuck? So I had to go to Walmart to hold the damn barrel bolt up to drill bits and try to figure it out. I figured it was a 3/16 inch by eye. Thankfully, they had a super cheap set of drillbits though so I got that instead of the single bit I THOUGHT I needed. Look, it has a tool for this shit!

Perfect fit for… the 13/64 Inches hole.

Why doesn’t America use metric again? What the fuck is this Imperial shit? 13/64s? Really? Anyway, no, I do not know what it is in metric. I only have this little tool that came with my cheap drill bits from Walmart. I’m sorry. Google it. Or better yet, I saw that IKEA sells a set of drill bits and a drill. Why the fuck didn’t they try to up-sale me that? I’d have totally bought it! And I’m sure it has the right size. Every order of furniture on the IKEA site should suggest you buy those tools. I’d have bought them, IKEA.

Thinking you can sneak by with that 3/16? You can’t. I tried. I mean, you can hammer it in with enough gusto. I just ended up using the 1/4 bit because that was the next size up I had. Good thing too because I was trying to line up the holes perfectly, and surprise, I don’t drill perfectly straight and parallel holes! So I needed the wiggle room. Even then, I was jamming screw drivers through to find the matching holes.

The videos I have seen have you drill straight through the two sides and attach. I wanted to be a bit more exact. So I separated the cases and drilled through a matching shelf support hole on each case. This way, I knew I wouldn’t screw it up and have a lopsided set of shelves. Cattywampus as we say in the South. But when I lined the cases back up, I discovered: I suck at drilling straight. So good thing I had a little extra wiggle room. I used a screwdriver to find the other hole and determination got me through. Jam that barrel bolt through any way you can and screw in the screw. TA DA!

You will need a screwdriver for each side. One to hold the bolt from spinning and the other to turn tighten up the screw. You’ll also need a vacuum for the saw dust.

Oh and DON’T PANIC — your hole is gonna look like shit. This is MDF with a paper overlay. The drill is not gonna leave a clean hole. It’s ok! Don’t panic. Just shove all the edges back in the hole before you put the fasteners in. See how clean it looks?

NOTES:

  • Drilling holes in things means you can’t return them.
  • If you ever disconnect these shelves, now they have random holes in the sides.
  • Do not use the two top and bottom sets of holes that are for door hinges. You might want to add those later.
  • Know where your shelves are going to go because the screw now takes up that hole so you can’t place a shelf at that level.
  • Do this before you install the doors. It will be a bit difficult for one person to reach both sides of the shelves around a door.

So there you go. The info I couldn’t find ANYWHERE. Go forth and assemble custom shelving solutions on the cheap. If you are going to build IKEA Billy case’s, shout out to this man:

That’s PP FlatPack on YouTube fucking pwning the assembly. Look at how he spreads the panels like a fucking deck of cards. His way is far superior to the IKEA way. Look how fucking fast and efficient he is! You know that instruction book/guide doesn’t even have words. Just watch this. I had watched it before mine arrived, took one look at the book, and did it his way. I had them together in no time.

And yes, I will totally show you the hall transformation in another post. I haven’t put the tall doors on yet. (Future me says click here for that reveal.)

I did put the two short doors on and that was a breeze! I thought it would be hard. I couldn’t find any particularly good youtube videos for it so I just used the book. Super easy.

DEADPOOL! Deadpool deadpool DEADPOOL!

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Are you aware that Deadpool 3 AKA Deadpool and Wolverine comes out Thursday? TWO DAYS FROM NOW. Did you know?

So tonight, I’m watching Deadpool. Tomorrow, I will watch Deadpool 2. And you’re damn fucking straight I already have our Thursday tickets. I bought them this weekend. DEADPOOL DATE! Yep, my husbands going to see Deadpool with me!

Let’s Fucking Go.

No seriously, I’m fucking JAZZED. Look at this adorable Deadpool Lego mini figure I got this weekend at Nerdy Noel. I have him sitting on my monitor like he was sitting on the highway in the first movie. See his little legs are even swinging:

And I didn’t know this until after I bought it and had it at home — BUT HIS MASK COMES OFF! His face is all fucked up and everything:

I’m kicking myself for not getting all three Deadpools they had and I don’t know the booths name to contact them. They had Bob Ross Deadpool and also Deadpool in the X-Men in Training shirt from the second movie.

Oh and I had to replace my refrigerator notepad. I had the “Note from Jack” pad but it got lost in moving. Somehow I have the BACK of the notepad, but none of the paper. So I got a yellow one with gold foil that says “Let’s Fucking Go” off of Etsy. Don’t yall act like you put that pad on yellow on accident. Uhuh.

DEADPOOL! I gotta go get dinner and then me and Louie are watching Deadpool 1. And just because I’m seeing it Thursday doesn’t mean I won’t go see it with you. You going another night? I’m down. Let’s Fucking Go. I already know I’m going to be obsessed with it.

Pumpkin Farming Adventures

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Welp, the first pumpkin patch experiment continues. I’m learning a lot. It’s not going as well as I had hoped. Keeping up with their water needs has been a huge pain. I had to get a cheap irrigation line and timer. The timer runs every 6 hours (it was that or every 12). They still wilt in the afternoon heat.

But then, global warming is killing us. Like literally, it’s cooking us.

Then I thought, maybe the water was draining through too fast. So I rigged up milk jugs to fill with the water and slowly disperse it through a pin hole. They perk up right after watering, but I worry how it will affect the fruit.

Slugs have also proven to be a problem. I expected assault from above and so I used insect netting. Turns out slugs were coming out between the mesh barrier and concrete and munching my leaves. I went out one night and saw the fuckers just eating away! WTF?

At first, they just terminated two vines early. But by the time I got slug bait/poison, they got to the heart of one plant and the main vine of another. Here’s how they looked this weekend:

Last night, I went out and cut off all the yellow leaves and found the heart of the problem. They had directly attacked the main vine. It has healed, but all that yellow in the middle died. Here it is today:

So frustrating! That’s the Jack-o’-lantern plant that had a month head start over the others. It takes 120 days to mature so it went out early. Bastard slugs!

Still, I’m finally getting some female flowers to pollinate! You can see that I removed the insect mesh since it wasn’t doing any good. I decided it would better serve me to cover more ground to keep out slugs and keep the weed vines from tangling with my pumpkin vines.

The past two mornings I’ve been able to go and fertilize two females each morning. Two minis and two large. Tomorrow, another large should bloom.

Im not sure if it was the slugs or my pinching off the male flowers that was causing my females to prematurely fall off. Maybe both. But now that I’m letting them bloom freely and removed the netting, there are many happy bees. Look at these cuties from this morning:

They were inside the prettiest vine. I think this is the vine that grows the big grey/green pumpkins. Love the variegated leaves and it has the prettiest flowers.

Unfortunately, it’s also the ones where the slugs attacked in the soil. I know because the marigolds I planted there are heavily munched. It is stunted, but still has some growth. No females on that one yet.

Lessons Learned So Far

I was very smart to put down a ground barrier. So smart that I used the insect netting to extend that barrier on the side. I used a sun sail and it is great. It’s thick and doesn’t let water sit long. Also blocks the light out and looks clean. However, I think the double layer of insect netting will serve the same purpose at a cheaper price. It’s much thinner. It will not keep light from the weeds, but it will keep them under it. It also stays wet longer, but I don’t think it’ll be too bothersome.

I like the twine that I tied from the plants (the poles that were holding up the netting) to stakes across the barrier. The vines want to grow towards the south and I’m training them to the East. I just inspect them every day or two to note female flowers and twist the latest growth around the twine. Also, since I’m growing in grow bags, the main plant is about 2 feet off the ground. This led to my first vine folding under its weight (had to use wood trim to support it). The twine has allowed me to slowly train the vines down to the ground while supporting the weight.

As for cons, well, slugs. I’ve got bug repellent and slug killer out now. The vines are so close together that it is murder to walk through for inspection. But I have to keep track of my female flowers. I only have one of each vine so I can’t rely on the pollinators. Maybe two of each type next year? Or make sure I use the same species so they can inter-pollinate? I will judge after the yield.

I’ve also let the vines on the sides spread out to make more room. I’m even letting the Jack-o’-lantern climb the stair railing to get it off the ground and away from the slugs.

The critter netting worked great until I could get everything growing well. Then, I added a layer of compost and a layer of mulch.

Instead of the cheapest timer, it might have been worth getting one with more customization options. Then I could water only in the heat of the day and not every 6 hours. Turn it on when it’s drooping and skip watering when it rains.

Another fail was using a cheap hose. I hooked up the timer with a cheap hose. It burst the next day. No shit. I guess it wasn’t meant to hold water pressure in a bend and full Alabama sun. Had to steal the hose from the garage for it!

This has been a more expensive and frustrating adventure than expected. Especially before this week. For two months I’ve been tracking female flowers only for them to fall off before they bloom. Now that I’m getting possible pumpkin babies, I’m much happier. I do hope they survive so I can watch them grow!

Oh, and I bought little labels to very loosely tie around the females to keep track of them. Super helpful when digging around in there to see if they’re soon to bloom. The females grow much closer to the main stem so you have to push leaves aside to find them.

It’s a big learning experience. I do hope to have something to show for it this Fall! It’s also been nice to watch it grow in that ugly rock corner. Such insanely large plants I started from seed!

Grow, my pumpkins, grow!

Well this lives rent free in my head now.

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So this is now moved into my head. We finally got our stuff moved back in and unpacked. So I posted the boxes and paper on Facebook Market Place to whoever wanted it — Free, of course. Someone came for the boxes and some of the paper. Then I reposted this post for just the paper. It was mostly a copy paste of the original text (hence the “We also” I didn’t edit out).

Screenshots and Text Only below. I didn’t edit out their names in the screenshots cause fuck ’em. I also didn’t edit out anyone’s (including my own) typos.

Screenshots

Text of screenshots (For ease of reading)

Actual Post: FREE! Just had our floors redone and had everything professionally packed. Well, these people must get paid by how much paper they manage to use!

We also have the MOUNTAIN of paper. No, we didn’t try to make that look bigger than it is. It’s that much paper. There is some paper I have flattened to keep for myself. You cannot have THAT paper.

Bring your own garbage bags! Like a lot of garbage bags. You bag it and take it. Do not stay here for hours flattening it out.

Don’t wear dirty shoes in my house. This was all over having to redo the floors.

First who can pick it up gets it. No dibs. I want it gone ASAP.

Comments

P1: You sound like a very pleasant person to deal eith

P2: I was thinking that too

P3: and look at her name, Karen!!!

P1: nailed it

P3: I say she can clean that shit up herself.

P1: I’m betting that’s what is gonna happen.

Nice Woman: Hi Karen I’m definitely interested. PM where to go. I live almost to Athens coming out of madison

P1: make sure you don’t spend hours straighten it out. Oh, and you can’t have the pieces that have already been straightened out. Oh, wash your nasty feet first

Nice Woman: she was very nice I got it all.

P4: Definitely a Karen lol

ME: I don’t see whats wrong with giving away almost a hundred dollars worth of quality paper for free. I thought someone who did paper craft would like to use it. Would make wonderful base for sculpting or paper mache or someone that does parade floats. Or a teacher or community center that does crafts for multiple people. It ended up going to someone who ships out a lot of product.

It’s rude to wear dirty shoes in someones house. That’s just manners.

And why would I give away the paper I took the time to flatten out myself? I only wanted enough to pad my Christmas decorations and to give a friend who is getting a garage soon and will be packing things up.

If someone hadn’t wanted it, I’d have bagged it up myself and found somewhere to donate it or take it off to recycling. It’s clean large sheets of heavy weight paper in an air conditioned room. It’s not a big job to bag up. I just didn’t want to go buy more garage bags because I knew I didn’t have enough. I just figured I’d give someone the chance to have it if they wanted it. Sorry that offends you?

Nice Man: They get paid by the amount of boxes so the more they fill up with paper the more boxes they use so you pay more

ME: Holy crap — that would explain THIS! Even all my canned goods were individually wrapped. This is a tiny tomato paste can.

And a vase of paper flowers was in its own box with nothing else!

I will ask my contractor what their charging model is. This was all due to a washing machine overflowing and damaging the ceiling, walls, and floor. So insurance is covering it all. I’m just paying my contractor (who built my house originally) and he’s the one who contracted out the movers.

I’ve no doubt I was charged heavily for all of this top quality paper as well.

I was shocked when they moved everything back in because we didn’t have that much stuff. But there were almost 10 boxes just from my pantry. Like this tomato can and all my nalogene bottles were individually wrapped as well. 5 cans of pumpkin puree, all individually wrapped in this giant paper. It was insane. I finally had to get my husband to come help me unwrap stuff. Because it wasn’t that we had so much, it was the unwrapping that was taking forever!

They packaged my craft buffet and one of my crayon boxes has about 200+ crayons. They’re all organized in those typical crayon boxes within a box that hold two rows each. Well, they ere packed in doubles. Yeah, not just wrap up the crayon box. They separated out the crayons and wrapped the individual sub-boxes two at a time. In this huge paper.

My husband (and the first lady who took the moving boxes and some of the paper) thought they were just being thorough so we cant claim they broke anything…

But it was literally just being moved from my house to the garage.

Conclusion

WTF? I fucking hate people.

LOOK AT IT!

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An actual custom made Doctor Who production prop from the 2006 Christmas Special featuring my favorite Doctor!

It has the certificate of authenticity with it too!

I’m sure there were hundreds made and used (The Doctor causes an ATM to spew money to create a crowd for a distraction). But to be able to get one 18 years later from an iconic episode – WOW! And it was a Christmas special! And wasn’t this Donna’s first appearance?

And my favorite Doctor! He wasn’t my first Doctor (that was Eccleston), but by far my favorite!

Holy shit, I must now quest to get David Tennant to sign it.

The other day, I watched a whole segment on YouTube from the British Museum about this:

I gotta hang this up. I’ll put my old school 3D glasses with it!

LOOK AT IT! How can I get David Tennant signature? Does he even do CONs on the US?

Bring back the stocks?

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Today I learned the difference in stocks and pillory thanks to Reddit!

Stocks vs Pillory WITH PICTURES:

STOCKS

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stocks

PILLORY

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pillory

Why did we get rid of stocks?

I always thought “stocks” referred to the pillory! I didn’t even know the actual stocks was a thing!

So I get that the pillory is kinda harsh cause they can’t sit and all, but why did we get rid of stocks? I’m 100% seriously asking this question.

You just sit there with your feet bound for people to judge you. As long as someone’s making sure the people in the stocks are safe, it doesn’t look too bad, honestly. Set some up on courthouse square. Most of the pictures even have multiple stocks in a row. So you’re sitting there WITH someone to chat with who’s in the same predicament.

This is way cheaper than a jail cell for like sobering people up or just minor offenses where you get community service or no time. Or for people let off with a fine. Like politicians. One hour in the stocks for the Instagram.

Seriously, this sounds like how I always had to stand against the wall in the back of the cafeteria for talking too much. Like, most days my ass was standing in the back of the cafeteria. Same thing. I was heavily bullied in school, but standing in the back of the cafeteria never particularly bothered me. Way better than detention. I’d get told to stop talking while I was standing there.

Men be living on easy mode

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Guys be living on easy mode and don’t even know it. I know that’s not a grand revelation. Duh. We all know this. But it comes down to the smallest things.

My house has been a construction zone for a month. Workers in and out most days. My cat lives at my friends house. That mess is still on going but the end is in sight. So why am I saying this? I gotta put on a bra.

Every fucking day. I’m working from home but if I wanna go get a drink from the garage, I gotta put on a bra because there’s strangers in my house. Does my husband have to do this? No. He can roll out of bed and go to the grocery store. Can any woman do that? NO.

You might be telling yourself that I don’t have to wear a bra. Technically true — but I’m 41 and fat and my nipples always poke through everything. And I don’t like showy nipples. So just to leave my bedroom, I gotta put on a bra. Men don’t have to do any of that shit.

Thank you for listening.

Presidential Election Candidates

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Biden is 81 and Trump is 78. Do you think either one of them could navigate a self checkout? I propose a test:

  1. Send them to Walmart with a list of 5 regular grocery items.
  2. Have them estimate the total cost of their transaction.
  3. They have to get to Walmart ALONE. I understand that the secret service may have to tag along, but they are to offer no assistance. They have to locate and drive to Walmart alone.
  4. They shop alone for their items.
  5. They go through the self checkout. And yeah, they wait their ass in line. Maybe put makeup on to disguise them.
  6. Then they must navigate and drive back to the starting place.
  7. Compare expected cost vs actual cost for fun.

Think either one could do it in a reasonable amount of time without visibility struggling at any part? And they’re supposed to represent ALL OF US.

I wonder if they could even pump gas and pay at the pump.

Do you think they know about tap-to-pay?

Most Americans can’t even dream of when they’ll finally be able to retire. What’s retirement age now? 67. If you wanna retire, you gotta work and grind for 47 years. And that’s assuming you save up to be able to retire at all, and don’t start working before age 20. I started working at 15.

These out-of-touch motherfuckers could have retired 13 years ago. Most people don’t even live long enough to reach their age.

THEY HAVE OUTLIVED THE AVERAGE AMERICAN MALE LIFESPAN (76 years).

And that’s the current male life span. Trump (the younger of the two) was born in 1946. The average American male life span when he was born was 64. He’s 78.

He turned 16 in 1957.

  • Gasoline (not 10% ethanol bullshit, either) was 28 CENTS a gallon.
  • TVs were black and white.
  • Leave it to Beaver hadn’t even PREMIERED YET.

He turned 21 in 1967. THE PRIME OF HIS LIFE.

  • Gas was 33 cents a gallon.
  • Minimum wage was $1.40 per hour
  • PBS was starting.
  • The handheld calculator was INVENTED.

Biden is even older.

We’re so fucked.

Why isn’t there a maximum age for this shit? They shouldn’t even be allowed to drive at that age (unless they pass a driving test every year).

UPDATE!

What if we put them on The Price is Right!?

The Washing Machine Incident Phase II

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So, you may have forgot, but back in February, we had The Washing Machine Incident. The upstairs washing machine leaked while we were in the shower. It leaked through the ceiling, walls, and light fixtures below. That weekend, we had to have mold remediation cut holes in the drywall and run insanely loud industrial fans for 4 days to dry it all out. It traumatized the cat.

It also ruined the floor right below it. We can’t patch that floor because they no longer make our floor — because of course they don’t. So all the floor that touches that area has to be replaced. Hello open floor plan! That’s our entire downstairs. Entrance, living room, dining room, kitchen and hall all need to be replaced.

Sounds cool. Free floor. But it’s not.

One, dark floors aren’t in style anymore. And we can’t pick just any floor. We still have a staircase and the flooring upstairs that it has to match. So with dark flooring out of style, we were severely low on choices. I PRAY this floor looks okay. We are going from engineered hardwoods to vinyl plank which should be awesome. Vinyl has come a long way in the eight years since we built. It should be better by not showing foot prints (I hate that about our current floor) and not scuff/scratch/dent so easily. The engineered hardwood also hasn’t held up great in high traffic areas. It’s easy to chip off those corners in some areas. So it’s an upgrade even though it’s cheaper. Weird. I hope it doesn’t look too shiny.

We had, like, two options. No really. Two options. We originally had three when we came home from the store. They didn’t follow Builder’s instructions though and showed us floor that couldn’t be glued down. So the flooring lady had to find whatever she should that she thought might match and bring it buy. Two. Just-a-two. One we liked the color better and one we liked the finish better. We went with the color. I HOPE IT’S NOT SHINY. Also, when I say we liked the color, I mean to match our cabinets. It’s weird. The cabinets and floor both pulled very dark red when installed. Now they pull orange where the sun has faded them. It’s better than yellow, but we had to account for that. Sorry, beautiful mahogany swatch.

We wanted our builder who did the house to do everything, so we had to wait until he had time. He’s in high demand and doesn’t have time for shit. We were willing to wait though. So now here we are. A few month’s later, we’re ready to go.

The Moving

The moving happened Wednesday. Being that the whole downstairs floor is being replaced, we had to move out the entire downstairs. Including kitchen appliances. Yep. Even the fucking pantry.

We’ve living upstairs. With a refrigerator and a toaster oven in the garage. Also, I bought a bunch of storage totes for the pantry stuff because we’ve had mice in there before.

That’s fun. They broke my refrigerator too. They didn’t put it back together properly and shoved the drawers in. Broke a piece of plastic that the drawer slides on. It’s not terrible and invisible once everything is in place. However, I have very little hope when it comes to them moving it back in. I’m worried. I’m going to ask builder to make sure he or I are here to watch them move it.

It’s really weird. The downstairs echoes so much that even locking the door is heard throughout the house. And if we want a drink or snack or anything, we have to go to the garage to get it and bring it back upstairs.

Thankfully, we both work upstairs. Husband uses his office for work and play. I have no desire to do that. I need to have separate work and relaxation locations. My relax location is the livingroom. That’s where I live. And they took that away. So…

My Nook

Remember when I moved my old apartment couch into the bedroom to make a “nook” to escape when my in laws were visiting? Well, this is where I hung out during the weekend of the remediation. And it’s where I’m hanging out now. Only this time, it will be for a month. And there’s no kitchen. Anyway.

We moved all the downstairs plants up here so they can still get care. I’m a very “out of sight, out of mind person.” That’s how I killed the gorgeous gigantic peace lily. I put in the guest bedroom, and forgot to water it regularly. (NOTE: When gifting plants to people with pets, look up toxicity, for the love of god). My office has plants but it doesn’t get as much light as our bedroom, so we brought up the card table and put everything in here.

Of course, I brought up my laptop and table. That is what I do. But what about the TV? I usually have my firestick playing videos while I play on my laptop. For a weekend it was fine, but a month? So I also brought in the small guest bedroom TV. Why don’t I just use the guest bedroom? Well, there’s just a bed in there. Not a couch.

I have a pretty damn sweet nook going on. I love all the plants being around me. I have a great view during the day time. If I had a minifridge for drinks and snack I’d be rocking and rolling! The only shelf stable snacks are trash. It’d be nice to have a minifridge for drinks and yogurt and salami and cheese snacks. But not worth the expense for just one month. No use for it after this.

I have a fan too! The bedroom’s ceiling fan is broken. We’ve bought a new one to replace it, but we have not yet done that. So zoom in here to my using a full sized ceiling fan in the box as a table for my small table fan pointed right at my face. I solve problems. Extremely comfy couch too.

It’s gonna be a downgrade for the nook when everything goes back to normal. I don’t do bedrooms with TVs. But I am going to keep some plants in here. I like the plants.

What About Louie?

I already told you that the weekend of fans traumatized the cat. We didn’t think it would be bad because we were both here. We were just upstairs. He mostly hang out on this couch with me. But now he’s so jumpy all the time. He jumps when the AC kicks on now! So this whole thing was not going to be good for Louie. Also, he tries to escape out of any door the second he thinks you might be about to open it. He’s watching. Fucking all the builders and people who have come over have let him out. So he had to go.

What? No, I didn’t get RID of my cat. He’s staying at K’s house. He stayed there over Christmas and did great. So she has graciously agreed to let him stay there during this hot mess. I dropped him off Tuesday before the movers came on Wednesday. Friday, I even went over for a sleepover! Cause my house is weird as fuck now and I miss my cat. Did he snuggle me all night because he missed me? No. He’s Louie, not Jack. But look, he did go to sleep touching both of my feet. That’s significant Louie love right there.

I can’t remember the last time I did a sleepover that wasn’t family. Like, did I even do sleepovers in high school? But K’s guest room has been converted to Louie’s room because she has three dogs. So two baby gates in the doorway allow Louie to jump through but not any dogs. And it has her old purple mattress and I’ve never slept on a purple mattress before. She even has a nightlight and fan cause she knows me. AWESOME.

Though, to be honest, the sleepover made me feel worse. Louie let me have lots of his little five-minute snuggles. Where he wants all the snuggles and fake purrs real loud to ham it up. He can be so so so sweet in short bursts. Yet he was still very alert. I was afraid he couldn’t relax and was too high strung. Even though he doesn’t like the big dogs, he’s still all up and about walking around the house and laying on the floor. Weird cat. Strangely, he fears the big gentle dogs but not the small very active dog. Louie, you need to reprioritize.

In the morning, I grabbed some yogurt to eat in the living room. Louie just wanted to stay in his room and wail at me to return. This made me feel terrible. And having to leaving him again was heart wrenching. I wish I could explain to him that I love him and it’s just temporary and he’s gonna come back home!

I miss him too. I MISS MY FUZZY! I know. As husband and K both say, he’s fine. He’s happy with all the entertainment. I just miss him. I worry. K sent me pictures of him purring in her face today though and that made me feel LOADS better. So he is getting some of those good short pet sessions in. I’ll probably, actually feel really bad when I bring him back to our extremely boring home. I did after Christmas.

Two of her dogs just switched weeks to stay with her mom (joint pet custody). So it will be more calm. I hope he makes friends with their big gentle dog. They could be buddies! They made excellent progress over Christmas. I have hopes.

And Now

And now we wait. Drywall guy should be back tomorrow. I think floor work will begin Wednesday. I worry drywall will hold them up though because one of the seams was done poorly and will need redoing.

Also, the construction dust is EVERYWHERE. We have all of the rooms upstairs shut but the hall and railings are covered in dust. We also have to do that while they’re working because they leave the doors open so we turn the AC downstairs off and raise it really high upstairs and just try to keep it in our offices.

Three more weeks? Maybe? Hopefully not more? RIGHT?

I know that, in a year, I’m going to be happy we got new floors. They will hopefully wear and look better. They should have longer life than our older floor. They shouldn’t show my every foot print. They should be more durable. We won’t have the chips and scratches we have now. It should be good. Just gotta get through this mess.

WHAT IS THIS? A school for ANTS?

Posted on | by cursingcats.com | Leave a Comment on WHAT IS THIS? A school for ANTS?

Look at this hat, yall. I’m looking for a new pool baseball cap. So I searched for “Baseball hat ponytail.” Amazons fucked up algorithm showed me a “men’s baseball cap” first (Sponsored ad, of course) and this abomination:

My scalps gonna burn right through that damn thing. AND no ponytail elastic — FAIL.

OK WAIT — before we move on — what the actual fuck is this? This one doesn’t protect your scalp or block the sun from your eyes. Why does this abomination exist?

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Anyway, new topic. Also, I do understand the irony in this next situation.

So did you read my last post about how life saving and amazing my new BedJet is? Well, you just got the summery. So it blows air into a cloud sheet to keep you cool under the covers. Awesome. Until…

Yeah. Four times now, I’ve woken up a sweaty mess because Louie is blocking the air vent. Is Louie doing this to be near me? Fuck no he’s not. Louie isn’t a mushy lover. He has NEVER slept on my side of the bed (on occasion when we sleep late and he’s waiting for me to get up and feed him, he’ll be on the bed — on Anthony’s foot corner). And he’s not sleeping with me — hes RIGHT on the air output.

So nearest I can figure, It’s the vibrations or noise? The only place I feel anything from the BedJet is right there at the outlet — you feel the air blowing inside the sheet and therefor against your feet so it’s kind of a waveform/vibration feeling.

If he was on either SIDE of the airjet, it wouldn’t be a problem. However, hes completely blocking any air from dispersing into the sheet. This is a problem yall.

Yeah I get it hahaha, that’s so funny.

NO IT’S NOT. I’m SWEATING. I’m hot. Today, after I took this picture, I had to get out of my PJs and put on new underwear because I was so sweaty. I had a good thing and now I don’t. How do I fix this?

I just moved the nozzle to the side of the bed in hopes that maybe that will help? I don’t think it will, but we’re gonna find out. Is there a fabric that he would find very uncomfortable? Keep in mind that covering the counters in parchment paper had zero affect on him. Like would he do it on a tarp? Is there an very offensive pointy side of the velcro fabric?

And yes, I get the irony. For over a year, I’d wish and wish that he’d want to sleep in bed with me. Now it’s NOT COOL. I didn’t even intend that pun there.

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Lastly, an update: Our floor is getting fixed! They’re coming to pack up our entire first floor including kitchen appliances and move it all into the garage. They’ll be here Wednesday at 8:30am. So this is great!

And terrifying. Cause this week they’ll move stuff and fix all the dry wall. Then they wont start on the floor until like next week. I think next Wednesday? Or was it the NEW floor is going in Wednesday? I don’t know. But multiple week thing. Gotta move all our shit. Living upstairs and out of the garage. For lunch and breakfast, I gotta go in the garage where my fridge is and pass workers. I’m not looking forward to this.

Also, the mold remediation with the loud fans did something to Louie. It fucked him up. He’s all jumpy and scared of noises now. So we gotta get rid of him before any of this goes down. We can’t traumatize the cat again. So K is gonna take him in Tuesday night. But it’s gonna be MORE THAN A WEEK. And I already feel so bad leaving him! And also, like how often do I visit? Like I’m lazy and I don’t wanna go visit all the time — but he IS my cat and she doesn’t live far away. So like how often is often enough to not feel guilty? You know the answer is no amount. I will feel guilty no matter what.

So I did up a huge list of shit that’s gotta be done because I am stressed. Today, I wanted to lay on the couch and be a depressed crying blob of anxiety paralysis. However, my sweet husband kept looking at my list and going “hey we can do this” — and doing a lot of it himself. Like we tidied up the garage and got a table ready with the toaster oven. We clipped Louie’s nails. We put the card table in the master bedroom and moved all the plants upstairs. Then we took a nap and I planted some plants.

Yall, this week at work is also gonna be a SHIT SHOW. A fucking huge shit show dumpster fire. It’s not good.

STRESS